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A woman has opened up about how she was harassed by a random man for three months after being polite to him at a restaurant, saying he showed up at her workplace twice claiming to be an “old friend.”
Patty Brem, 44, of California, shared her terrifying story on Twitter last month as a warning to both men and women. The teacher explained that the stranger tracked her down after she naively told him which high school she worked at.
“This experience has forever changed the way I act around strangers,” she said. BuzzFeed. ‘I will never give out personal information, even if it seems innocent. I feel like I’ll always have my guard up from here on out, instead of willingly being nice.
In her series of tweets, she recalled how she met the man at a salsa bar nearly two hours from her home and had a polite but brief conversation with him.
Patty Brem, 44, of California, revealed on Twitter that a man she was educated with two in a restaurant harassed her for three months.
The teacher recalled talking briefly with the man at a restaurant nearly two hours from her home and telling him that she asked him what school he worked at.
‘He asked me where I was from and what I did and I told him. He was familiar with the city I live in and he asked me what school I taught at, so I mentioned the name,” he wrote. “It turns out that he was familiar and he referees some of my school’s football games.”
Brem said she told him to “have a good night” before sitting down to dinner with her sister, who then noticed the boy looking at her. He and his friend ended up sitting at the table next to theirs.
They made polite conversation and exchanged names before finishing their dinner and driving home.
“A couple of weeks went by and I got an email in my WORK inbox from the guy asking me to come out sometime,” she shared. “I never gave him my email address, number, or even my last name. I’m a little scared, but don’t reply, delete and get on with my life.
Brem received another email from him a few weeks later. This time, he said that he had recently refereed one of her school games and was “bummed out” that she wasn’t there.
Once again, she deleted his email without replying because she didn’t want to cheer him up.
Weeks later, he emailed her at work asking her to go out, but she ignored him. She later found out that he showed up at her school twice looking for her.
On December 13, she was having a conversation with the principal and vice principal when the school administrator came in and said that her “old friend” was at school and wanted to “hi” with her.
“I’m confused and bewildered as to who he could be talking about,” she explained. “My assistant manager says, ‘Oh, he came yesterday too, but you had already left. He asked me what time you got off work.'”
Brem realized it was the man from the restaurant when his last name was called, and she explained the situation, emphasizing that he wasn’t a friend.
He not only asked what time I finished, but also wanted to know when I used to leave school and from which door I left.
After being told that she was not available, he went to his car but did not leave. When the director came out, she drove one block and continued to wait for him. That’s when they alerted the school resource officer.
The man started circling the school in his car while one of his co-workers followed him until he stopped. He finally left after being told “a few choice words” by his colleague.
Brem said it took multiple tries for the man to finally leave, calling “one of the scariest days of my life.”
“An innocent and polite conversation with a stranger 3 months ago gave me one of the scariest days of my life today,” she concluded. Men, be better. Ladies, be careful out there.
Speaking to BuzzFeed, she said she blamed herself for being friendly with him and sharing his school’s name.
Brem has been on high alert since the incident. She began to park near the entrance of her school and asked her co-workers to walk her to her car. She is also careful to lock her doors and keep an eye on her vehicle when she is driving.
The police told him that he could apply for a restraining order if he tried to contact her again. He was also advised to tell her never to contact her again in case he sent any more emails “so there would be a paper trail.”
Brem hasn’t heard from him since he showed up at her school, but he wanted to share his story as a reminder for women not to share personal information with strangers and for men not to cross boundaries.
“It’s scary to be a woman in this world,” she said.
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