It’s the million-dollar question: What do women want? Flowers, romance and a diamond ring? Maybe 20 years ago, but today’s women book male escorts for one thing: sex.
And a lot.
With dating harder than ever, work schedules busier and time our greatest asset, women say they’re tired of their time being wasted by men they claim have lost the art of gentlemen.
I was Australia’s most famous escort for ten years. I also had a busy escort agency for women over 40 and also had an advertising platform for male escorts. Not only do I have hundreds of men who entrusted me with their deepest darkest secrets, but also women.
They told me why they booked male escorts and what their secret needs were. I know why a 46 year old divorcee spent $60,000 in five years on male companions and I can assure you it wasn’t for the talk.
Amanda Goff, aka Samantha X, was an escort in her late 30s (above)
While it takes two to tango, and women can be just as tricky in the dating game as men, ghosting, drama, and less emotional attachment were reasons why women preferred to book online.
I recently wrote that men saw female escorts for connection. Women don’t need connection like men; we get our emotional needs met through our friends, family, even our pets.
Women don’t want to talk for hours on end. We do that enough in our real lives.
Women want the F word: fun.
Here are the top three reasons why women pay for sex. Guys, please don’t shoot the messenger.
1. They want their confidence back
Hhaving kids changes women’s bodies. Gone are our flat bellies and sassy breasts. Just as it is joyful, motherhood can be a drain on our self-esteem and can make women feel unsexy and unwanted.
One mother said her secret sexy liaisons with a young male escort made her feel alive again and restored her self-esteem. A CEO in her 40s claimed that some men would refuse to be seen with her in public because she was overweight, but that her male companion would “proudly show me off his arm.”
2. They want good sex
“I was tired of men coming to eat what I cooked for them, and the food was always more satisfying than the sex,” said one divorcee. Women confess that they want to be with a man who “puts her pleasure first,” not a quick bam before disappearing.
Random men were into sex “for their own satisfaction,” said a former sex worker, as she “wanted to get down to business” with someone who was visually appealing without the headaches, stress, and time constraints of a relationship. Fear of being ridiculed and not being good enough was also present, with women wanting to express their sexual fantasies without being judged and with clear boundaries.
Goff said women definitely don’t want hours of endless talking in the bedroom. They don’t need connection, they need good sex
3. They want to be respected
The consensus among women was that social media had a lot to answer for. “Some men think it’s okay to introduce themselves by sending pictures of dicks and be rude, thinking it will get them somewhere,” said a former female police officer. “I’ve had men who also want sex the first time we meet and assume that ‘all women are easy’.”
A senior executive told me that the men she’d dated “nag too much about their ex-wives” and were intimidated by her independence. There were complaints that some men get confused by today’s expectations, are afraid to approach them, and don’t even buy their dates a drink on a first date. It was the convenience of booking an allotted time, knowing what to expect, ‘getting it in’ without the games, and most importantly, walking away knowing you still have your power.
Not all women, and certainly not all men. But the male escort industry is booming. I personally know men who make hundreds of thousands of dollars in this game, who get paid to go on five-star vacations, gifted apartments and motorcycles, arm candy at corporate events, and even the third party in a marriage.
Of course, being the sexpert that I am, I booked a male escort myself – for research purposes, of course. How did it go? I’ll tell you next time.
‘Samantha X’ or Amanda Goff, is a former escort, author and columnist
The male escort industry is thriving with men making hundreds of thousands of dollars in this game, says Goff