It wasn’t an admission I saw coming from Jackie O, but it is one I applaud her for. But publicly revealing that she is a recovering addict concerns me – and not for the reasons you might think.
Admitting you have a problem with alcohol and painkillers is a brave step for Jackie O, star host of breakfast radio program The Kyle & Jackie O Show. By doing this, she helps other women who may be struggling, opens the door for a more open discussion about addiction, and is vulnerable and honest – something I always appreciate in people.
Author Amanda Goff was struck by the courage of Jackie O (pictured) when she admitted her addiction to alcohol and prescription drugs. However, she fears Sydney’s eastern suburbs are not the place for a woman in the early stages of recovery
That hasn’t stopped the trolls, who are out in force, bleating about the fact that she only did it for publicity.
Jackie is a smart woman, she knows the media, she is the media. Of course, she knew that her confession—that she had checked into California’s Betty Ford Center in 2022 for alcohol and drug addiction—would boost ratings, make headlines and promote her memoir, The Whole Truth, which coincidentally is out today comes true. .
But I don’t care. I respect anyone who admits to having a drinking problem. It’s not easy to make yourself vulnerable, especially when you’re such a well-known public figure – and I should know. Although I am not yet as famous as Jackie, I have been in the news regularly since I admitted in 2014 that I was not only a top journalist and mother of two, but also worked as a high class escort under the name Samantha X.
Samantha X is the main character of an explosive anonymous book called Hooked: The Secrets of a High-Class Call Girl, which I admitted was actually my memoir.
And like Jackie, I came clean a few years ago about my battle with addiction.
My tumultuous relationship with alcohol lasted ten years, with the last three or four being the worst. I was a binge drinker: I would down a bottle of champagne on a night out, get drunk and suffer from a hangover for days.
“If anything will give you a champagne and drug habit faster than you can say ‘bags’, it’s Sydney’s east,” writes Amanda (pictured). “I’ll tell you: if you want to get clean in the east, you have to work extra hard, because it’s not just the rents that are high here, but the people.”
One morning, when I was 44, I woke up in a hotel room in Melbourne. I was hungover, depressed and suddenly felt the urge to jump. I called my girlfriend in a panic and she took me to a 12-step recovery meeting that same day. That was six years ago and I haven’t had a drink since.
Alcohol is very difficult to give up if you only use willpower. It is the most addictive, dangerous and widely available drug in the world, but I didn’t want to die, so I stayed at the meetings and learned to face the problems I was trying to numb with alcohol.
I don’t know Jackie personally. She interviewed me once on her radio show, almost ten years ago, when I came out as Samantha
We’re both the same age (okay, she’s maybe a year younger at 49), we’re both in recovery and we both live in Sydney’s eastern suburbs. I’m in Bondi; she’s a six-minute drive away on the quiet streets of Clovelly – in a $13.25 million oceanfront palace.
If there’s anything that will give you a champagne and drug habit faster than you can say “bags,” it’s the East. Those who want to get clean in the east have to work extra hard, because it’s not just the rents that are high here, but also the people.
Fast cars, fast lifestyles – and fast addictions.
I have lived in Bondi Beach for 25 years. Bondi is iconic. It’s exactly how the media portrays it: beautiful people, models in string bikinis walking through the streets, beautiful surfers with bare chests.
But the healthy lifestyle is a contradiction because we all know that if you scratch beneath the surface, most people in the East drink cola and champagne more often than they jog on the beach.
Amanda said she was hungover for days and had toxic thoughts when she drank. She is pictured on the left after a night out and right on the way to the airport, nursing a hangover amid her drinking problem.
Actually, they do both, which has always shocked me. After a night out, I spent the morning crying in shame, hugging my toilet bowl, without making the Bondi run to Bronte.
The East is full of Peter Pans – middle-aged men (and women) who refuse to grow up, who spend their afternoons snorting and drinking before school and rummaging through tissues on Monday mornings after hard weekends. It’s a superficial lifestyle: being seen opening wellness studios or promoting the latest sportswear online, as well as snorting lines from a dirty toilet in a bar in Double Bay.
Nice when you’re 25. A real problem when you’re 45. A tragedy if you are 50 years or older.
I’m not directing this at Jackie – she made it clear what drug she was addicted to and it was prescription painkillers, not cocaine. I speak to all the women over 40 who still do this.
And I know they are, because they tell me. They want to know how I managed to untangle myself from the hell that is addiction. They know how hard it is, not just getting sober, but… to stay down to earth in a place like Sydney’s eastern suburbs.
They want to know how I did it because they need help. They know that their Friday night “wines and rules,” their “mummy relaxation drinks,” have spiraled into full-blown perimenopausal alcoholism.
They know that their drug use – whether it’s Valium, a little Coke here and there, a bottle of wine or two – has become a daily necessity. But what they don’t know is how to escape the toxic situation they’ve gotten themselves into.
They realize that saying no to their group of party friends – and I use the word “friends” loosely here – is harder than you might think. Everyone loves keeping up with the Joneses in Bondi, yet I know the secrets these gated gardens hold. I know there are functioning ice cream addicts running businesses, health gurus with cocaine habits, mothers picking up their kids from private school with a few glasses of white wine.
Amanda has lived in Bondi Beach for 25 years. The beautiful bikini-clad women and beautiful bare-chested surfers are just one side of the coin (stock image)
I’m not going to sugarcoat it; it’s really hard to stay sober here. Staying sober when everyone around you wants to party is a challenge.
That’s why, after almost six years of not drinking alcohol, I still go to recovery meetings. I need to be reminded of how bad it has gotten and how bad it can still be. Rehab is great as a circuit breaker, but it’s the constant meetings and constant vigilance that keep you sober.
My social circle is very small now. I choose solitude and sobriety over being seen at the newest restaurant or going to the newest bar. Some may call me boring, or say I have changed. I to have changed. Thank God I’ve changed! Changing saved my life.
But Bondi hasn’t changed. The east will always be the east. Parties will always be parties, and the lifestyle will always be there.
Jackie – it can’t be easy for you in your world, and hats off to you for your level-headedness.
It takes a strong person to live in Jackie’s world and stay sober. As we say in the 12-step program: simple, keep it simple, one day at a time.
I wish her the best of luck.