>
Jackie Kennedy’s Secret Service agent revealed that the former first lady was prepared to die with her children during the Cuban Missile Crisis.
Clint Hill, 90, who worked under five presidents, said that as the nation panicked over fears of nuclear war with the Soviet Union in 1962, the first lady remained calm and patriotic.
Tweeting during the 60th anniversary of the Cold War confrontation, Hill said he was charged with securing the safety of the first family, but Jackie refused to hide.
‘When I told Mrs. Kennedy we would take her and the children into the shelter if there were incoming missiles, she said she would take John and Caroline and walk onto the lawn like brave soldiers and face the same fate of every other American,’ Hill wrote.
It is among the many stories Hill has shared of his time with Jackie, and his latest upcoming memoir, My Travels with Mrs. Kennedy, revealed the Secret Service agent attempted to take his own life following the assassination of President John F. Kennedy, according to excerpts given to People Magazine.
Clint Hill reminiced of his days on the Secret Service with Jackie Kennedy during the Cuban Missile Crisis and following JFK’s assassination. Pictured: Hill (left) and Jackie (right) shopping for souvenirs in Rome, 1964
Hill famously jumped on top of JFK’s car (above) when the president was shot to death during a motorcade in Dallas Texas, in 1963
This is the first time Hill, 90, (above) has opened up about his own personal struggles following the shocking murder of the president and his grieving family who Hill protected
Discussing his memories of the Cuban Missile Crisis, Hill said Jackie (left) remained calm under the fear of nuclear war
Hill said Jackie refused to hide in a shelter with her two children, instead opting to ‘face the same fate of every other American.’ Jackie is pictured with her kids, Caroline and John Jr.
Pictured: Jackie playing with her son, John Jr., in front of the White House lawn, where she was prepared to stand in should nuclear war break out
Hill recounted the story on Twitter during the 60th anniversary of the Cold War incident
Hill’s latest memoir also goes into his personal turmoil and attempt to take his own life following Kennedy’s assissination. He said he was haunted by the moment he jumped on the president’s car and looked at Jackie’s horrified face (above)
Hill’s latest memoir about his days with Jackie Kennedy comes out October 25
In his book, Hill said he was consumed by feelings of guilt and failure when the president was shot on November 22, 1963, in Dallas, Texas.
‘It was the time when everything changed,’ Hill wrote. ‘Mrs. Kennedy had lost all the things associated with the Presidency and the children no longer had a father.’
Hill said he remained guarding Jackie and her family, accompanying them to their regular trip to Palm Beach, Florida, the following month.
On the night of December 29, 1963, Hill couldn’t stop thinking about the presidential assassination and walked into the ocean.
‘Guilt and anguish consumed me,’ he wrote. ‘All I could think about was Dallas.
‘I was running as fast as I could, my arm reaching for the handholds on the trunk but it was like my legs were in quicksand,’ he said of the moment Kennedy was shot. ‘Mrs. Kennedy climbing out of the back seat, her terrified eyes looking but not seeing me, like I wasn’t there.’
Describing his suicide attempt, Hill wrote: ‘Tears streamed down my cheeks, and as the cold water enveloped my legs, and then my chest, and up to my shoulders, the tears turned to sobs. I wanted the water to swallow me up.’
Hill said he was ultimately saved by a Palm Beach police officer, who dragged him out of the water.
It is the first time Hill has publically discussed his suicide attempt, noting that he’s glad to finally open up about it.
‘Somehow, there is a sense of freedom in no longer keeping that darkness to myself,’ he wrote. ‘People will judge me, I’m sure. But no one — no one — has ever walked in my shoes.’
Hill (above with Jackie on a trip in Italy in 1962) said that following the presidential assassination, he was racked with feelings of guilt and failure. He attempted to walk into the ocean after accompanying their grieving family to their Florida home
Hill served as Jackie’s personal guard and followed the first lady on all her trips. He said everything changed for him and her family following her husband’s murder. The two are pictured walking out of the Middleburg Community Center, in Virginia
‘Mrs. Kennedy had lost all the things associated with the Presidency and the children no longer had a father,’ Hill wrote of the assassination’s aftermath
The newest memori is the first time Hill (above) has revealed his suicide attempt
The memoir, which is out on October 25, mainly recounts the travels of Hill and Kennedy and serves as a sequel of sorts to his 2012 bestseller, Mrs. Kennedy and Me.
It includes anecdotes of Kennedy’s 1962 lunch with Queen Elizabeth in Buckingham Palace, and her trip to Morocco in 1963 to visit King Hassan.
During the African trip, Hill joked about the moment the first lady and her sister, Lee Radziwill, dined with the king’s brother and unknowingly ate desserts that contained cannabis, known as mahjoun.
‘Mahjoun, as it turns out, was the Moroccan version of hash brownies,’ Hill wrote.
Hill kept in touch with Jackie Kennedy for a few years after he stopped working for her and was reassigned to serve Lyndon B. Johnson.
In the immediate wake of Kennedy’s assassination, Hill accompanied Kennedy’s body to Parkland Memorial Hospital.
He was then tasked with buying a casket and ensuring it safely transported Kennedy’s body back to the White House.
For his services to the first family and in quickly covering up the president’s body during the shooting, Treasury Secretary Douglas Dillon presented Hill with an award for bravery in December 1963.
Pictured: Hill accompanying Jackie (up front) through Boston Public Gardens as fans of the first lady join them
Hill kept in touch with Jackie Kennedy for a few years after he stopped working on her security detail
Hill also reminisced about the time Jackie and her sister, Lee Radziwill, accidentally ate desserts laced with cannabis during their trip to Morocco, where such treats were common in the king’s court. Pictured, Hill accompanying the sisters during a trip to New York in 1964
Hill has always lamented that he wasn’t fast enough to use his body as a shield to protect JFK. Pictured: Hill (left) looking on as the president and first lady greet supporters outside the White House in 1962
Hill often accompanied the Kennedy’s on their trips to their Palm Beach home, where the agent attempted to take his own life. Pictured: Hill looking after John Jr. as the president makes a phone call in the Florida home
Yet it wasn’t until after he retired from the Secret Service in 1975 that Hill would seek help for his trauma over the assassination.
He was diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder and spent six years in seclusion, according to the Sun.
From 1976 until 1982, he drank heavily and rarely saw anyone besides his wife and two children.
‘I just didn’t care about anything and I didn’t want to have contact with anybody,’ he said.
As a result, he says his children were forced to grow up ‘pretty much without a father.’
But finally in 1982, he realized he needed to change if he wanted to live –after a doctor friend warned he would die early if he didn’t stop his pattern of destructive behavior.
In 1990, he was able to return to Dallas, where he walked around Dealey Plaza and looked up at the sixth floor window where Oswald fired his shots.
In 2013 his book – Five Days in November – was published to coincide with the 50th anniversary of JFK’s assassination.
Since then, Hill has gone on to share his stories serving the White House.