Elliot Page has revealed that he knew he should have been born male from the age of four, and he asked his mother when he was six, “Can I be a boy?”
Page, 36, came out as transgender in December 2020 and is one of Hollywood’s most high-profile trans stars.
Juno’s Oscar-nominated star published his long-awaited memoir, Page Boy, on Tuesday.
Page writes about his extreme gender dysmorphia – describing his struggles to come to terms with who he was, and describing disturbing incidents of confrontation with a stalker and self-harm.
He explains that he knew from a young age, growing up in Nova Scotia, that he should not have been born female.
Elliot Page, 36, is photographed Tuesday in Manhattan’s Times Square with his mother Martha Philpotts. The pair were in New York City for the unveiling of Page’s billboard in Times Square, promoting the memoir
Page’s billboard was pictured in Times Square on Tuesday
Page said he knew from the age of four that he should have been born male
He tells of a date with a woman named Sara, in Manhattan, and Sara asked, “When did you know?”
Page writes, “I knew it when I was four years old.
“I went to the YMCA Kindergarten in downtown Halifax, on South Park Street across from the Public Gardens.
“I mainly understood that I was not a girl. Not in a conscious sense, but in a pure sense, untainted.
“That sensation is one of my earliest and clearest memories.”
Page writes that he tried to pee standing up because he felt it was more natural.
“I was stunned by my experience, separated from the other girls, stomach cramps as I stared at them,” he writes.
Page asked his mother, Martha Philpotts, a public school English and French teacher, at the age of six if he could be a boy.
She replied, ‘No honey, you can’t, you’re a girl. But you can do anything a boy can.’
Page has claimed he had sex with Juno co-star Olivia Thirlby ‘all the time’ while they were filming the hit 2007 movie (pictured)
Page wrote of Thirlby, “It was on. I had an all-encompassing longing for her, she made me long in a way that was new, hopeful.’ He added that it was one of the first times someone would make him orgasm (pictured together in 2007)
Page, photographed at the Oscars in March 2022, publicly came out as transgender in December 2020, but revealed that he started feeling “like a boy” from a young age
Page writes of multiple crushes on girls at school, and at the age of eight felt moved while watching Sandra Bullock in the 1996 movie Two If By Sea – which was filmed in Nova Scotia.
He writes of feeling ‘my heart is beating for Sandra Bullock, my eight year old self doesn’t understand I was in love again’.
“Twenty years later I would have dinner with my friend Catherine Keener and Sandra at the famous Craig’s in Beverly Hills.
“Sandra looked so cool, in jeans and a hip rocker T. She was kind, funny, and grounded, just as my eight-year-old self imagined.
“Oh, these strange roads we travel.”
Page also revealed he had a secret relationship with Kate Mara after coming out as gay in 2014 – and while she was dating Max Minghella (pictured 2017)
Page also describes a terrifying episode in which a pedophile stalker began to follow him, eventually pursuing him for five years before he was arrested.
The saga began with his first television role, when he was 11 years old, in a CBC series called Pit Pony, which aired from February 1999.
“In the beginning he became a friend, albeit a secret one,” he writes. The stalker was in his twenties and became a “secret pen pal.”
“I made a stupid website in high school when we were learning HTML in computer science class,” Page writes.
“The man who had seen me on CBC found the website and contacted me through that website.
Over the course of a few emails, a bond began to grow—a companionship.
“We wrote about our grievances, our loneliness, our incongruity with our surroundings and with ourselves. Children’s drama for me, something different for him.’
Page writes that he “began to express deeper feelings” that made his stomach growl, but he didn’t want to lose a friend.
The man said he came to Halifax from Toronto, where he lived. Page eventually convinced him not to, and managed to distance himself.
Page remains one of the most high-profile transgender men in Hollywood
But when Page moved to Toronto himself at age 16, he resurfaced — knowing Page would be there.
The emails piled up. He added pictures of me with my eyes closed, photoshopping himself with huge angel wings above me, staring down.’
The stalker captioned the image: ‘I’m going on you in the clouds of heaven.’
He also sent Page links to missing children websites and lyrics to the Creed song “My offer.”
Page told his friend and roommate Wiebke, and soon after, the stalker emailed Wiebke and several other friends, claiming to be a long-lost friend of Page’s and wanting his address to surprise him with a visit.
Page called the police and the man was arrested.
When Page told his father Dennis, who had divorced his mother when Page was two, Dennis was furious with Page for allowing the man to contact him, saying, “I’m going to come to Toronto and kick your ass.” give ass.’
Page was issued a restraining order and the man’s photo was shared with classmates and teachers.
But soon after, the stalker found Page and confronted him on the street, stroking his shoulder in downtown Toronto as Page walked toward a subway station.
The stalker said to Page, “You look familiar.”
Page describes the terrible fear and certainty that he was about to be stabbed to death. The stalker tried to convince Page to go with him, but Page managed to yell and the man ran off.
He was later arrested and diagnosed with schizophrenia.
Page refused to press charges and he agreed to live with his father and seek mental health treatment.
“It all ended rather abruptly,” Page writes.
“And if there’s anything good in all this, it’s that he’s finally been seen. He could now get support for his pain.
“I hope he got the help he needed, I hope he never did this again.”
Page says the episode increased his self-harm and eating disorders.
Page wrote that his father’s reaction was also something that traumatized him.
“If I didn’t deserve care right then, if I didn’t deserve security and love, when would I ever?” he is writing.
“That phrase has lived in my body much longer than the man’s threats, his obsession, his fingers stroking my arm.”