Writer, 62, reveals unbearable grief of losing only child to anaphylactic shock aged 25
A writer who lost her only child to anaphylactic shock has exposed the heartbreaking reality of her struggle with grief.
Tina Hedin, 62, says she has been on the brink of shattering since the devastating death of her daughter Kierstin, who she called Kiki, at the age of 25.
Her nightmare began on January 8, 2023, when Kiki developed a severe food allergy that couldn’t be reversed with her EpiPen.
She was rushed to Massachusetts General Hospital where she was placed in a medically induced coma, but sadly died just days later on January 13.
“I entered the world of grief and discovered that when the worst happens, the cruelest thing is that it doesn’t kill you,” Hedin wrote of her. blogging. “The pain makes you wish you were dead, but you still have to move on.”
Writer Tina Hedin, 62, who lost her only child Kiki (far right) to anaphylactic shock, has exposed the heartbreaking reality of her struggle with grief. In the photo: mother and daughter with father Eric
Kiki had a severe food allergy reaction on January 8, 2023 that could not be reversed with her EpiPen
Hedin exposed her grief in her blog, Letters from Turkey Town, which she uses to cope with her loss
The grieving mother has turned to writing to help cope with her loss and her place in the world now that she no longer has her only child.
She cherishes the last time she was with Kiki, the day after Christmas in 2022 when they pored over an art book – a passion they shared.
In a separate essay for the New York TimesHedin describes breaking down over something as trivial as losing a bottle of water at the gym, because “some days I just couldn’t stand losing anymore.”
“I used to be the mother of a 25-year-old,” Hedin wrote. ‘I used to have a young person who loved me, belonged to me, connected me to the world of young people.’
After she was first admitted, Kiki’s parents prayed that she would make a full recovery.
“She is a strong girl and has always been a fighter, so we only think of positive things,” father Eric wrote.
Since her daughter’s death, Hedin has packed up her life in New Hampshire to hit the road in a van with her husband.
The couple both had a very close bond with their daughter and were left bereft by her death, a loss compounded by the death of Eric’s mother in the same year.
She was the couple’s only child and died just days later after being placed in a medically induced coma from which she never woke up.
Kierstin, or Kiki as she was known, died on January 13, 2023 at the age of 25 after suffering from anaphylaxis
Hedin described how the pain of her loss makes her wish she were dead, but she has to keep going
“We don’t cry in public anymore, or not often,” Hedin said. ‘But December is a minefield. I find myself getting irritated and upset and crying over nothing. However, it is not nothing. It’s the only thing. The irreparable.’
In a post on Facebook on the anniversary of his daughter’s death, Eric’s sadness was still palpable.
“One year ago tonight, Tina and I rested our heads on Kiki’s chest and heard her last heartbeat. “We stayed with her for a while afterward, put lotion on her, brushed her hair, talked to her and held her for the last time,” he said.
“Since then, there have been all the firsts without her: birthdays, Halloween, Christmas, Father’s and Mother’s Day, and each has been a challenge.
“I don’t want to be thought of as the poor man whose daughter died, but as the man whose daughter lived a wonderful life and left such an impact on so many.”
The couple now plans to honor their daughter by getting the same tattoos as them.
Hedin also channels her grief in her newsletter ‘Letters from Turkey Town’.
Eric Hedin says he wants people to think of him as ‘the man whose daughter lived an amazing life and left such an impact on so many’
Kiki’s story has echoes of the death of Órla Baxendale, 25, (pictured) who suffered an allergic reaction to cookies from a Connecticut store so severe that not even her EpiPen could save her, according to lawyers for her family.
“It’s not all sad here,” Hedin wrote. ‘My inspiration to write does not come from my daughter’s death, but from the strength of her life, her sense of humor and the love that lives on.
Kiki’s death was one of a thousand deaths from anaphylaxis that occur annually among Americans. A fatal outcome is a rare, but very real threat to allergy sufferers.