Why should I put money away if I will never make enough to live the life I want? Money psychotherapist VICKY REYNAL reveals what to do…

I work full time at a local bookstore and try to save a little money every month. I am 28 years old and one day I would like to have my own place and a family.

But my friends keep saying it’s hopeless to even aspire to such a future when we’re saddled with student debt, home prices are only rising, and the cost of living is rising.

They say I might as well enjoy my life, spend what I earn, travel and have fun. Part of me thinks they’re irrational, but why save if I’ll never earn enough to live the life I want?

Money psychotherapist Vicky Reynal answers: It sounds like talking to your friends has left you quite discouraged about your future financial prospects. It’s difficult for many people in your generation to feel like they have much agency in achieving a financial future similar to the one they saw their parents achieve.

What your friends are describing is known as “doom spending” and it’s clearly tempting to them because it makes them feel in control, at least over their short-term pleasure. That’s much easier than being left with the powerlessness and ‘financial helplessness’ that comes with putting away money, but feeling like it won’t do you any good in the long run.

But this kind of baleful spending could be a short-sighted strategy – not just financially – but also psychologically.

Firstly, because you may find that the benefits of spending (such as the highs we get from buying something we like and being impulsive with money) don’t last long, while the guilt that sometimes follows means that you may not ultimately feel better about spending money. a consequence of your expenses.

You may also feel guilty if you are not fully convinced of this strategy, and part of you knows that it will harm your freedom to change your mind later. It will also decimate the pot of money you’ve built up.

Second, if expenses come from the “wrong” emotional source, they can easily spiral and you may end up spending more than you can afford.

What do I mean by ‘wrong’ emotional place? Instead of it being a deliberate and conscious choice (“I’m going to enjoy this money and I’m happy to do so”), it comes from anger. Or perhaps spending becomes the way you deal with your financial worries about the future.

But if you find yourself in debt as a result of mindless and impulsive spending because you are angry and frustrated, you may have sabotaged not only your future financial prospects, but also your short-term financial situation. And that won’t help how you feel.

In fact, it will add financial anxiety to the mix of feelings you have because you will have compromised your short-term financial resilience due to your inability to cover unexpected expenses. Instead of feeling freedom, you may be left with a sense of uncertainty and instability.

I am not advocating that you continue to have false hopes, but rather that you focus on what you can do to be in a better financial position in the future. Consider alternatives to the financial goals you initially set out to achieve if they seem unattainable.

Maybe home ownership feels unlikely. So can you allow yourself to replace these with goals that still seem worthwhile and that – with a little smart budgeting – you can still enjoy achieving and find satisfaction in achieving?

You can allow yourself to feel the anger of the uncertainties you face, such as the high cost of living, the frustration at the uncontrollable nature of the factors that affect you in a real sense (such as inflation).

But instead of acting out the feelings and almost spending your hard earned money out of anger, acknowledge them, talk about them with peers and then think about what is in your control.

Having a small nest egg that over time and a little exponential growth (compound interest in financial terms) can yield more than you intuitively think.

It may not be the down payment you dreamed of, but it can be a good enough amount that will still give your future self a sense of achievement and freedom to make an investment that feels valuable and that will give you a sense of can get satisfaction. by.

I invite you to consider whether that isn’t more worthwhile than impulsively spending money for the short-term highs without considering the future.

Your current self may not care now whether money is available for larger investments in the future, but your future self may think differently. Your future self must also be taken into account so that you don’t sabotage your future options.

• Do you have a question for Vicky Reynal? Email Vicky.Reynal@dailymail.co.uk