Why I’m telling my daughter to marry RICH: Some might call me anti-feminist, but I wish MY mother had instilled in me how crucial money and status are in a partner… Anyone who says wealth can’t buy happiness is kidding themselves!

A stately home on an acre of land, an immaculate black VW Beetle – electric of course – on the long gravel driveway and a wardrobe packed with designer clothes, shoes and handbags. As for the preferred pet: a pack of Saint Bernard dogs (yes, that’s a cross between a Saint Bernard and a Poodle).

There will also be regular foreign holidays: Lapland at Christmas, Florida in the summer. Oh, and a second home in the mountains for skiing of course.

My 17-year-old daughter, Lara, has mapped out her future with laser-like precision. She even has a Pinterest account, where she keeps ‘vision boards’ of where she’s getting married (the chic spa hotel Luton Hoo is a current favourite). She has also decided on the names of the two children she wants to have (although she won’t share them with me).

And while she may not know the identity of her future husband, she knows one thing for sure: the size of his bank balance.

Lara is unapologetic about her desire to marry a rich man. And instead of ruminating on what some might consider a depressing retrograde goal, I’m right behind her.

My 17-year-old daughter, Lara, has mapped out her future with laser-like precision. And while she may not know the identity of her future husband, she knows one thing for sure: the size of his bank balance

She even has a Pinterest account, where she keeps ‘vision boards’ of where she’s getting married (the chic spa hotel Luton Hoo is a current favourite). She has also decided on the names of the two children she wants to have (although she won’t share them with me). In the photo: Luton Hoo Hotel

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying she should sit back and forget about her education. She goes to a private school and got only As and A*s in her GCSEs last year.

She has her sights set on Oxbridge and is keen to study classics before converting to law. She then plans to work for one of the London law firms in the ‘magic circle’.

Admittedly, her reasoning for pursuing academic success is that she believes such institutions will help her achieve the ultimate goal: meeting a like-minded, very wealthy man. She even goes so far as to say she would like to marry the boss. Some may shy away, but why not aim high? I support her 100 percent.

What mother doesn’t want the very best for her daughter? Anyone who says money doesn’t buy happiness is kidding themselves. That’s damn well possible!

We tell ourselves these downright outdated stories to justify where we are in life. Of course you can have money and love. If only because money ensures that you can really actively choose to buy the things that make you happy. I have friends who are extremely wealthy and have long and happy marriages; and I also know people who live in social flats and who are not happy.

It never occurred to me that mothers would criticize such ambitions for their daughters. But when a recent post on a parenting forum asked, “Be honest! Has anyone ever planned to marry a rich man and/or encouraged his daughters to do so?’ it caused an uproar.

Commenters on the thread said everything from “Marry a rich man and you’ll earn every cent” to “Would I pimp my daughter to an older rich man?” That’s a no from me.’

They say women have certainly made progress since the days of Mrs. Bennet in Pride And Prejudice. But the fact that a woman has a good career herself does not mean that she wants to ‘get married’.

Lara is smart and ambitious, but I don’t want her to be the breadwinner – can you imagine that? I’d be shocked if she picked up the slack (not to mention the bill) for a beta male with low expectations in life.

Even £50,000 a year wouldn’t be enough. In an ideal world, her husband would be making a six-figure salary at his peak – of course! We live in expensive times and you have to keep up.

But in all seriousness, the current cost of living crisis has focused everyone’s attention on how much harder it is to buy a nice house, drive a car and start a family of your own.

People might think I’m anti-feminist and say I’m doing Lara a disservice by encouraging this kind of attitude. But I really wish my mother had impressed on me the importance of money and status when I was Lara’s age.

I had a normal middle-class upbringing in Hertfordshire. My father was a surveyor and mother stayed home to take care of me and my sister. We went to the local high school and I was 19 when I had my first serious boyfriend, who was a musician. (Sadly, he died years later of a drug overdose at the age of 40.)

He was one of the very unwanted boyfriends in the line. That’s why I’m glad Lara doesn’t look like me.

I made the mistake of going into my first marriage with my heart and not my head. My ex-husband had absolutely no income to speak of when we met in 2004.

I was 30 and somewhat blinded by the fact that he lived in the US. Within a year he had moved to Britain to live with me and I was soon pregnant with Lara.

That’s when the hard work really started. I found myself working three jobs (in commercial rental, evenings at Marks & Spencer and somehow I also fit in some work in John Lewis merchandising).

Unsurprisingly, I was exhausted throughout the pregnancy – and the horrible morning sickness I experienced didn’t help.

My then-husband managed to get a job in a warehouse for a major retailer. We were barely upwardly mobile.

Lara is unapologetic about her desire to marry a rich man. And instead of ruminating on what some might consider a depressing retrograde goal, I’m right behind her

That said, because I always had a strong work ethic, I had a pretty decent nest egg, which meant that when Lara was born, I was able to take a few years off before returning to the real estate world. I had climbed onto the property ladder in my early twenties and was already on my third home: a four-bedroom townhouse in St Albans.

Fast forward to today and I have a flat in Dubai, as well as a few other properties I rent out in the UK.

After splitting from my ex in 2008 when Lara was two, I now live in a beautiful four-bedroom house in Hertfordshire with Lara, my second husband, Nicholas, 64, a sports broadcaster, and our son, Zack, now eight.

People often assume that because Nicholas works in television, we’re in on it, but that’s not the case. He is now freelance and there are no overnight guarantees in the fickle world of entertainment.

We paid £15,000 a year in tuition for Lara until Nicholas was suddenly made redundant in 2015. When I explained that I had to take her out of school because we could no longer afford it, she was offered a scholarship. If they hadn’t, I would have stopped going on vacation, gone to cheap supermarkets, bought clothes from thrift stores, basically I would have scrimped and saved to keep her there with the exact same peers I know all shops will open. kind of doors for her later in life.

Research consistently shows that to get ahead in life, the old adage “it’s not what you know, it’s who you know” still holds true. Just this week, a survey found that just under a third of young workers secured their jobs through a personal connection. Private school fees may be a stretch for us, but Lara is already in good company: one of her friends is the daughter of a Manchester United footballer.

Lara has been at boarding school since she was 16 and is doing incredibly well academically.

I push both my children to do well. “Strive to be the best” is a pretty good motto to live by. That’s why I’m picky about the kind of money Lara marries with. I would be concerned about someone who has never lifted a professional finger in their life and prefers to live off a trust fund. Where is the ambition? I want her to be successful and be with someone who is also the best they can be.

It was after watching Legally Blonde at the age of 12 that Lara first announced her desire to marry money. Yes, she was inspired by the character Reese Witherspoon, who proves everyone wrong by becoming a successful lawyer, and Lara wants a brilliant career of her own. But she also wants a rich husband.

Money will not only give my daughter a comfortable life, but also choices. If, when she has children, she wants to stay home with them, she can. Likewise, if she wants to go back to the office right away, decent childcare won’t be an issue for my grandchildren.

She plans to establish her career first and start a family in her 30s.

Lara is just starting to date. We both agree that we shouldn’t have tattoos or piercings. Such visible marks are a total barrier to a decent life and the opportunities that come your way.

Moreover, Lara is so innocent that her ears have just been pierced.

I recently asked if there were any serious boyfriends on the horizon. Things can change so quickly with teenagers.

I got the usual mature response from my daughter: “No, Mom.” School is my priority, friends certainly not.’ She had a date last month and I warned her not to kiss the boy unless she was sure they would see each other again. Your first kiss is the one you will remember forever.

I didn’t have to worry. Lara told me he had no ambition and he made the fatal mistake of announcing that the Latin club was stupid.

Lara certainly doesn’t need my help in selecting the right dates. I’m sure she’s got her head spinning on that one.

I’m glad she’s moving up a social class. There’s no shame in being upwardly mobile. No matter what the naysayers say, money really does make the world go round.

As told to Samantha Brick