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A woman refuses to attend baby showers and weddings of people who ‘don’t make the effort’, claiming it is ‘offensive’ when she is invited ‘just for the gifts’.
Lanette Rincon, 30, of Loveland, Colo., finds it “extremely rude” when people she doesn’t spend alone time with or see or hear on a day-to-day basis ask her to hit big milestones. base.
He claims to make exceptions for friends and family who live across the country, only turning down invitations from them if he doesn’t have time to join the celebrations.
Lanette says she thinks a lot of people invite her to baby showers, birthdays and weddings “just for the gifts” and says she’s making sure to say no to those she wouldn’t classify as close friends or family.
Lanette insists that her attitude stems from experiences with former co-workers and friends who she claims regularly post on social media with their social circles.
It left her feeling like she had “never thought about her” until she was invited to a big life event.
She shared the controversial version on social media, stating that she finds it “extremely offensive” when she is asked to spend money on milestones in other people’s lives if she is not included in their “life progressions”.
Lanette Rincon, 30, of Loveland, Colo., refuses to attend baby showers and weddings of people who “don’t make the effort,” saying it’s “offensive” when she’s invited “just for the gifts.”
You find it “extremely rude” when people you don’t spend time with individually or see or hear from on a day-to-day basis ask you to go for big milestones.
The business manager said: “I heard someone talk about something similar a few years ago and it really resonated with me, it’s like a social media trait.”
‘I never hear from some people for a lunch or a coffee date or a girls’ night out, but they only invite me to the big guys when they need the numbers.
‘If I don’t get invited to regular stuff, then it’s incredibly offensive to be invited to big stuff.
“If they had invited me and wanted me to bring a gift, I probably wouldn’t end up going, and if I did, I wouldn’t bring it, but it depends on the circumstances.
‘Recently, in the last couple of years, I was dating this person, but they soon turned on me by actively trying to hang out with them and getting unreciprocated.
Lanette’s video explanation racked up more than 1.5 million views on TikTok and received a mixed response from users.
“And then when it came to a big event, like a wedding or a baby shower, that they needed the extra numbers for, I heard from them.
“When you show up to that wedding, for example, you feel awkward and you don’t know how to talk to them and then you end up in a difficult position.
Or when people ask how you know the girlfriend, it becomes awkward.
Lanette is aware that not everyone feels the same way, but she wants to point out that everyone has their own rules.
“I think everyone has their own level of boundaries and self-respect,” he said.
“People have their own image of what a friendship looks like and it’s all personal preference.
Taking to her TikTok to explain, Lanette insisted that her attitude stems from experiences with old co-workers and friends who she says regularly post on social media with their social circles, but don’t invite her.
“And for me it’s about self-esteem and the level of boundaries you want to set with people—knowing your value as an individual and as a friend.”
“I have my circle and we all respect each other and we all have that mutual understanding.”
Lanette’s video explanation racked up more than 1.5 million views on TikTok and received a mixed response from users.
One disagreed, commenting, ‘Hell no, I can’t keep up with all the little things. Happy to show up and support big milestones, if it was important enough to be invited.’
Another said: “Except I don’t do movie nights or girls’ nights or anything like that, but I wish the important people in my life were there for the big moments.”
Others agreed with Lannette, saying, “It’s funny how I only get invited when my presence requires me to bring a gift.”
While another added: ‘Absolutely. I have cut so many people out of my life this year because of people like this.
Lanette admitted that others told her she was being “mean” and “childish” and that she should “grow up.”
She said, ‘Like I said, I think every person is different
‘My answer is that it’s okay to have different ways of doing things.
“Set your own limits that you have with your friends and that’s it.”
Lanette tries to avoid confrontation when she can and doesn’t often reveal why she might not come to something.
She said: “I don’t really disclose because I’m not really a confrontational person, but when I feel like I’m being taken advantage of, I just say I won’t be available at the time.”
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