Where are your manners? Study finds the word ‘please’ is used less than one in ten requests but researchers claim it is NOT a sign people are becoming less polite

It’s the magic word, of course, but it seems like ‘please’ is losing its power.

Today, the word is used in fewer than one in 10 requests, a study shows.

Researchers from the University of California, Los Angeles recorded 17 hours of conversations in shops, hairdressers and at home, and analyzed the number of times people said ‘please’.

They found that it is used in only 7 percent of requests – and often only when confronted by someone who is grumpy, clumsy, or has already rejected a request.

The research, published in Social Psychology Quarterly, also shows that women are less likely to say “please” when addressing other women than men.

Researchers from the University of California, Los Angeles (pictured) recorded 17 hours of conversations in shops, hairdressers and at home, and analyzed the number of times people said ‘please’.

That helps explain why women are less likely to get a please: they only get one 5 percent of the time, compared to 8 percent for men. Andrew Chalfoun, a sociologist at UCLA, says: “Policymakers have warned of a rise in incivility caused by a fragmentation of social ties and have tried to curb these trends by promoting civility.”

However, he said that “please” was not necessarily a sign of politeness, but was simply used when social situations required it, such as when dealing with a difficult person.

Dr. Chalfoun added: ‘This particular use of ‘please’ explains its scarcity. “Please” is not a general indication of politeness.

‘It may be tempting to conclude, as many have, that the rarity of ‘please’ is yet another sign that we are becoming less polite.

“Yet this research suggests that ‘please,’ like ‘thank you,’ is not an all-purpose courtesy sign that should be used whenever possible.”