Scientists have discovered that a person’s birth order directly affects his or her dating choices.
The theory is based on the idea that the order in which you are born influences your personality traits and the dynamics of your relationships.
The core idea is that opposites attract. In other words, people seek partners whose birth order matches their own, the licensed marriage and family therapist explained.
For example, eldest daughters and youngest sons often have opposing character traits, which makes them a better fit for each other. Wright herself is an eldest daughter married to a youngest son, so she can attest to this.
Understanding what your birth order says about you can even help you “predict” who you’ll be attracted to.
Scientific research shows that a person’s birth order has a major influence on the type of romantic partner he or she seeks.
“In my experience, both professionally and personally as a firstborn, firstborns tend to receive more attention and resources from their parents,” Wright told Business Insider.
“It can lead to higher academic performance, better leadership skills and a more conscientious character.”
The youngest siblings, on the other hand, “often develop more social and outgoing personalities,” she said, because parents tend to take a more relaxed approach to raising their younger children.
Therefore, the oldest and youngest siblings make a complementary romantic match, with the firstborn naturally inclined to take the lead, while the youngest is eager to cooperate.
However, dating someone with the same birth order as you can lead to disaster. For example, two firstborns may fight over who gets to control certain aspects of a relationship.
On the other hand, two younger children may have difficulty finding structure and dividing responsibilities in a relationship.
For only children or middle children the theory is less clear. They can identify with both the oldest and the youngest children.
However, there are certain personality traits that are specific to only children and middle children. These people may be looking for a partner who complements these aspects of their personality.
For example, middle children are often very adaptable and good at compromising, so they may pair well with firstborns.
Only children are often intelligent, conscientious and independent and therefore fit in well with the youngest children.
The birth order theory has caused quite a stir on social media, with many people on TikTok and Instagram confirming that their own dating history supports the theory.
“I’m the oldest daughter and all my relationships have been with the youngest sons,” one TikTok user said.
“I’m stunned,” she added.
But birth order dating theory isn’t a hard and fast rule. Ultimately, every relationship is unique and can’t be defined based on assumptions about what makes two people compatible.
“We can’t speak in absolutes, whether it’s who you are based on your zodiac sign or your birth order,” Wright said.