We won’t force our children to learn to read and write
One couple has revealed that they won’t force their three young children to read or write — and will even let them set their own bedtimes.
Adele and Matt Allen, both 39, from Brighton believe in ‘child autonomy’ and say their children Ulysses, 12, Ostara, eight, and Kai, four, can make their own decisions.
The couple first met deadlines when then-year-old Ostara shocked viewers by urinating on the floor during an episode of This Morning in 2016.
Since then, the stay-at-home mom, Adele, has shockingly revealed that her kids don’t stick to a set schedule, bedtime or meal times in what she calls an “unschooled” approach.
In addition, the couple refuses to vaccinate their children and instead look to natural and herbal remedies for when they feel bad.
Adele and Matt Allen, both 39, from Brighton (pictured with their children) say they will not force their three young children to read or write – despite criticism from other parents
Ulysses, 12, Ostara (right), eight, and Kai (left), four, get to make their own decisions — including setting their own bedtimes
The pair have eschewed the “cruel” and “lazy” labels thrown at them by other parents, with the pair defending their actions, saying their children have now forged a strong sense of identity.
“Our son was ten years old when he started to take an interest in reading and writing,” said Adele.
“He just took pen and paper and taught himself,” she added.
‘The kids go to bed when they want, wake up when they want, because we don’t like alarm clocks and we don’t have fixed meal times. We just make food when they are hungry, and as they get older they make their own food.’
“We never force children to do chores. But we do actively encourage them to help. They help us take care of our animals, garden in our allotment garden and keep their rooms tidy.’
Adele – who breastfed her children until they were three – explained that they have no need for school and would prefer the children to go their separate ways, with a little guidance from her and Matt.
“We’re just following their lead,” she said.
“We don’t use the education system. Instead, we let our children go to school. That means they have to show interest in something so that we can investigate it together with them.’
The frugal mother – whose daughter famously urinated on the floor during an appearance on This Morning in 2016 – also refuses to vaccinate their children
Ulysses, (pictured far right) 12, was ten years old when he began to be interested in reading and writing
“Because they’re not in a classroom, there’s no pressure to do certain things at a certain age.”
“We believe in children’s autonomy and empowering children to take control of their lives, make their own choices and decide what happens in their lives instead of being dictated to.”
However, this does not mean that there is no guidance. It’s about involving them in the decisions.’
And so far, the mother-of-three says their unconventional parenting style has paid off, with their eldest Ulysses picking up passions for animals and computers, while daughter Ostara has taken up sewing.
She also shed light on her and Matt’s natural lifestyle, which she says progressed naturally after she got pregnant.
The eldest Ulysses of the bunch has picked up a passion for animals and computers, while daughter Ostara (pictured) has taken up sewing
Kai and Ostara together with the family dog. The children do not follow a strict routine and instead enjoy a more fluid schedule
She said, “I didn’t have medicalized births and we started doing things differently and outside of this system.”
“We have not done any vaccinations for our children, which people say is cruel of us, and we are not using the health care system. Instead, we use natural and herbal remedies.”
“We just focus on natural remedies and grow our own herbs so the kids are involved as well.”
“People also think we are cruel to the children because we don’t use health care or believe in vaccines. It really pisses them off.’
And for the haters who call parents “lazy,” Adele says they could be completely wrong, given the sheer amount of work and effort it takes to raise their kids.
“People have called us lazy, which just makes me laugh, because our parenting style is the opposite of lazy.”
“They don’t see our lifestyle in action. It is fully reflected in the fact that we don’t have as much free time as adults because we don’t have the routine of putting the kids to bed.’
‘Every day looks different with us. We don’t have a strict schedule that we follow every day.’
“And we always monitor the children, their emotions and how they feel. We don’t just send them to school for teachers to handle. We have to respond and adapt to how they appeal.’
“I think it could be confused with permissive parenting, where there are no boundaries or guidance, but we do have boundaries, but no arbitrary rules.”
“We take full responsibility for their development.”
Adele says fellow parents label her “lazy” but they couldn’t be more wrong, due to the sheer amount of work and effort that goes into raising her kids
The parents believe that their unconventional parenting method gives their children a strong sense of identity
The news comes as the wife and mother revealed she wouldn’t turn on her radiators except in “extreme” circumstances – and would instead use a minimal amount of lighting in her home.
Last year, the thrifty mum stressed that central heating was dangerous and said she didn’t want to expose her three children to “health risks” posed by radiators.
The couple is also known for sparking controversy with their “off-grid” parenting updates on YouTube and Instagram.
And in 2019, the family of five revealed they were claiming £900 a month in benefits while living in council housing, while Adele’s partner Matt worked just a few hours a week as a yoga teacher.