We organised our entire wedding in TWO DAYS after finding out my dad’s cancer had spread

By William On Aug 21, 2023

A couple staged their wedding in just two days so the bride’s father could escort her down the aisle – after his cancer worsened.

Mary Grace Quigley, 33, of Croydon in Adelaide, Australia, was devastated to learn that her father Barry, then 79, probably had not long to live.

Barry discovered that his skin cancer had spread to his lymph nodes and doctors advised against surgery.

Medical professionals said he probably only had a few months to live — so Mary was heartbroken that her father probably wouldn’t live to see her and her partner, Thomas Stapledon, 34, get married months later.

Their families gathered to organize an entire wedding in less than a week so that Barry could be there.

Mary Grace Quigley, 33, from Croydon in Adelaide, Australia, married her partner, Thomas Stapledon, 34, in a wedding they planned in just two days

Mary organized the wedding so that her father could walk her down the aisle – after his skin cancer worsened

Barry had been diagnosed with a stage four cancerous tumor on his neck in November 2022 – which had quickly grown out of nowhere.

It originally started as a skin cancer before spreading to retired teacher Barry’s lymph nodes.

The following month, doctors told Barry and his family that it was bad news and they would not advise surgery – and he probably only had two months to live.

Mary and Thomas had recently attended a friend’s wedding where not all of the bride and groom’s parents were able to attend.

When they heard Barry’s prognosis, they realized how badly they wanted both parents at their wedding, so they knew they had to act fast.

Mary suggested Thomas, an audio engineer, on the phone on December 15 to get the ball rolling.

On December 15, Mary proposed to Thomas in a non-traditional way – by phone, as he was infected with Covid at the time.

Then they began exploring how to have a short-term wedding — after the first celebrant they contacted was booked up for the next six months.

This included using a dress Mary already had, Thomas’ mother and aunt helping prepare a cake, and family helping them decorate their backyard.

Their big day went ahead thanks to a last-minute reveler who heard their story and stepped in to help.

Mary was devastated that her father would probably not see her and her partner, Thomas, get married again (pictured on their wedding day)

Mary, an online content creator, said: “We agreed that if we had the chance to have all of our parents there, we wanted to do it and have that special moment.

“I wanted my dad to know that my husband is taking care of me, so it’s okay if he’s not around. I thought it might give him more peace of mind.

“We had recently moved into a place with a big backyard, so it came together perfectly when we were planning it last minute.

‘On the day itself we wouldn’t have wanted it any other way, everything went perfectly.

“It’s heartwarming and emotional to think how many people contributed to make that happen.”

Skin cancer (non-melanoma)

Skin cancer is one of the most common cancers in the world. Non-melanoma skin cancer refers to a group of cancers that develop slowly in the upper layers of skin.

The term non-melanoma distinguishes these more common types of skin cancer from the less common skin cancer known as melanoma, which can be more serious.

Around 147,000 new cases of non-melanoma skin cancer are diagnosed in the UK each year. It affects more men than women and is more common in the elderly.

Mary was devastated to learn that her father Barry, then 79, probably didn’t have long to live (pictured together on Mary’s wedding day)

Incredibly, despite only having two months to live, Barry has defied all odds and is still fighting on

Thomas’ mother and aunt help prepare a cake and family helps them decorate – their backyard with flowers and disco balls hanging from the trees

But after hearing Mary and Thomas’ story, the celebrant offered to reach out to others in the area who could help — and soon they had a date on the calendar.

Mary said, “We went to her that afternoon and she completed all the paperwork.”

Thomas still wasn’t sure if they would get married that soon – so Mary started planning things on the off chance that he decided to go for it.

He decided to go through with it on December 22 – two days before the wedding on Christmas Eve.

With only two days to go, they rushed to get everything ready.

Thomas’s aunt, Shirley Quinn, and his mother, Rosemary Stapledon, organized a last-minute wedding cake.

A friend of the family, Bill Fragos, came forward to host a barbecue for their 50 guests.

At midnight on the day of the wedding – December 24 – the whole family was in the dark in their backyard setting up decorations. Flowers were picked from Mary’s mother’s garden and some were bought from the local central market

Mary pulled a white dress she had never worn from the back of her wardrobe, which became her wedding dress

Mary on the morning of her wedding with flowers picked from her mother’s garden

Mary pulled a white dress she had never worn from the back of her wardrobe, which became her wedding dress.

MARRIAGE BREAKDOWN:

Photography: $500

Reveler: $440

Mary’s dress – From Ebay about $100 second hand which happened to be white – meant to wear to a birthday party but never worn

Cake – Tom’s aunt arranged for a cake maker she knew, who stepped in at the last minute. Costs a few hundred, but is covered by Tom’s family

Wedding car – free from friends of Tom’s sister

Flowers – made by Mary and Tom’s sister, from Mary’s mother’s garden and some from the local central market

Mary’s engagement and wedding ring – passed down through family

Tom’s wedding ring – a special Irish ring from his aunt

BBQ food – Tom’s friend brought it, who had a family event and had a lot of meat left over

Decorations and chairs – Tom’s family brought them everywhere and set them up.

Helping with making cutlery, glasses and drinks – everyone joined in, but Tom’s mother did most of the work – and brought extra cutlery and glasses

At midnight on the day of the wedding – December 24 – the whole family was in the dark in their backyard setting up decorations.

Their families had to bring items such as cutlery and chairs from home to make sure there was enough for all the guests.

Mary said, “So many people have helped make that happen. It’s heartwarming and emotional how many people have contributed.’

Incredibly, the morning of the wedding everything was ready to go – except for the vows, which the bride and groom sat together that morning before the guests arrived.

The whole day cost the pair just $940 (£740) – just for the reveler and photographer.

The day, December 24, 2022, went exactly as they had hoped, despite the short notice and the fact that it was Christmas Eve.

Mary said, “It was absolutely perfect. We didn’t warn anyone to come, but everyone came – a friend came from the interstate.

“It was so perfect and never would have happened if we weren’t in this horrible situation with my dad, so it was kind of a happy ending.”

Incredibly, despite only having two months to live, Barry has defied all odds and is still fighting on.

A conversation Thomas’s sister, Catherine Stapledon, 28, had with a colleague at work about the wedding at short notice led to them learning that the colleague’s brother was a specialist neck cancer surgeon.

After other doctors told Barry it wouldn’t be worth operating on, the surgeon took over Barry’s case and had surgery on January 20 of this year to remove his neck tumor.

Since then, follow-up scans in late July showed the cancer was gone, thanks in part to their marriage.

Thomas wasn’t sure if they would get married that soon – so Mary started planning things in case he decided to go for it

Mary said, “I can hardly believe it. If we hadn’t been married, my sister-in-law would never have had that conversation.

“So Dad wouldn’t have had the surgery and he wouldn’t be here right now.

“Our wedding was already great, but knowing it saved my dad’s life really made it the best day ever.”

Barry said: ‘Everyone seemed to think this was the best wedding they’ve ever been to. I don’t know if that happens at every wedding!’