Warning signs your ex was a narcissist

Psychologists have shared warning signs that your ex-partner could be a narcissist.

The signals are related to their inability to bond, something that people with the disorder struggle with.

That’s probably because they see themselves as a hot commodity and have an abundance of romantic options, which leads them toward infidelity and a shorter relationship.

Studies have shown that narcissists use a one-sided dynamic in their relationships, seeking validation, admiration, and reassurance while offering nothing in return.

Without the excitement that comes with looking for a new partner, the narcissist feels incomplete and his over-inflated ego can make him believe he is more desirable than he really is, experts claim.

According to a study published by the University of Georgia, “narcissists not only perceive that they have alternatives to their romantic relationship, but also report paying attention to and flirting with them.”

The study’s researchers theorized that one possibility is that the narcissist always “goes for the better deal” and looks for a more attractive partner who they believe is better than their current partner.

Another possibility is that because narcissists are constantly seeking thrills, the pursuit that comes with acquiring another partner seems to fit.

It gives them a rush of excitement that often diminishes when their new partner wants a closer and more personal connection.

It has also been suggested that the narcissist simply fears abandonment and wants to end the relationship before he or she becomes too emotionally involved, thus opening themselves up to pain.

A 2020 study Researchers at the University of Groningen in the Netherlands have found a definitive link between narcissism and relationship dissatisfaction, which often results in infidelity.

‘Narcissism is associated with poor relationship functioning, such as a lack of relationship commitmentlow emotional intimacy and sexual aggressionincreased interest in sexual processes and high levels of infidelity,” the study said.

‘Narcissistic romantic partners are less faithful, less emotionally intimate, less likely to associate sex with intimacy, and desire to have multiple sexual partners.’

Other researchers have also found that narcissists tend to devalue their partners and view themselves as superior rather than showing appreciation for their many qualities and traits.

In any quality relationship there is give and take, with each person demonstrating partner enhancement, meaning they view their partner more positively than they view themselves.

Without this aspect of the relationship, narcissists view their partner negatively, creating discord and hostility that is often revealed through verbal or physical arguments and conflict.

They don’t have the ability to celebrate their partner’s achievements, which creates an unfair relationship where one person is more invested than the other.

Some narcissists may view their partner’s successes as rivalry and may experience their daily interactions with them as more negative or accusatory, according to a study. study from Albright College in Pennsylvania.

“Narcissists tend to blame others for their problems and are particularly sensitive to signs of rejection,” wrote the study’s lead author, Dr. Gwendolyn Seldman. Psychology today.

These types of people have a need to be constantly validated and demand that their partner take endless care of their ego.

“Partner enhancement can ensure that a partner’s intentions are not perceived as mean or malicious,” say Anna Czarna and Magdalena Śmieja, who co-authored a 2022 study about narcissism and partner improvement, told Forbes.

“Couples who demonstrate partner improvement deal more effectively with conflict, use less negative communication, and have higher relationship satisfaction,” they continued.

‘Such couples are also more likely to progress in the union, moving from dating to engagement and marriage.’