Unearned praise is not as effective as sincere plaudits if you want people to like you, experts say

Everyone loves a compliment, but empty flattery won’t get you anywhere, scientists have discovered.

Researchers found that — whatever the old adage may say — undeserved praise isn’t as effective as sincere praise when it comes to getting people to like you.

A team from Japan examined the brain activity of participants who received sincere feedback or insincere flattery after completing a task – and found that activity in parts that control feelings of reward and pleasure was higher when the praise was earned.

As an example of flattery, where a compliment does not necessarily reflect a person’s true qualities or abilities, they cited, “You are the most intelligent person I have ever met, not to mention your charm, wit, and good looks.”

While sincere praise might be, “This meal is delicious—it’s clear you’ve put a lot of thought into it.”

In the journal Frontiers in Human Neuroscience, the Tohoku University researchers write: ‘Using functional magnetic resonance imaging, we measured brain activity when healthy young participants received sincere praise or flattery after performing a visual search task. A higher activation was observed during sincere praise than during flattery…implying a rewarding effect of sincere praise.”

They added, “Sincere praise is a social reward, but the effect of flattery is controversial,” explaining that the “reliability” of the compliment is important. Previous research has shown that flattery has a negative effect on how trustworthy someone is perceived to be, as it is ‘untrustworthy’ feedback.

A separate team of researchers previously discovered that compliments can improve performance just as well as being rewarded with money.