Tragic final words of doctor, 33, before he died by suicide – and his stark warning to hospitals everywhere
A doctor who committed suicide left a heartbreaking suicide note saying he had ‘run out of gas’ as he warned of the enormous pressure doctors are under.
Dr. Will West was in his third year of ophthalmology training at the George Washington University School of Medicine and Health Sciences in Washington DC
His suicide at the age of 33 devastated his friends and family, as well as those he worked with.
The dedicated doctor, who was nicknamed the ‘Iron Will’ for his determination, said it was not a single event that led to his death, but emphasized the enormous pressure of his stay, which his family say did not prevent him from seeking help.
“To those who will be negatively affected by my actions, I am so sorry. “I’m simply out of gas and have nothing left to give,” West wrote in the note he received from the American channel WashingtonPost.
Dr. Will West, who committed suicide, left a heartbreaking suicide note saying he was ‘out of gas’ as he warned of the enormous pressure doctors are under.
‘I apologize that this is the best I can do for the farewell. Many of you deserve better, but you can’t talk about these things much in advance, so a note will do.”
In the days before his suicide, West, of Sandy, Utah, reached out to his younger brother David and appeared to check in on his other siblings to make sure everything would be okay after his death, his brother said .
David, who is also completing his medical studies, explained that the grueling conditions of residency, which often include 80-hour work weeks for relatively little pay, can take a huge toll on students’ mental health.
But worse, clinicians are often afraid to speak up if it will harm their career prospects, David said.
Doctors are required to disclose mental health treatment when applying for certain jobs.
West had been diagnosed with ADHD and depression, but he did not seek hospital care despite seeking treatment in Utah for fear of professional repercussions, his brother said.
“Imperfection is not allowed,” David explained. ‘Neither is weakness. When it is there, it is treated with contempt instead of an opportunity to learn and grow.”
West, pictured with his ex-girlfriend, was in his third year of ophthalmology residency at the George Washington University School of Medicine and Health Sciences in Washington DC
His suicide at the age of 33 devastated his friends and family, as well as those he worked with
This was something West alluded to in his suicide note.
“For those in positions of authority over residents, a simple reminder that we come to you seeking the possibility of a better life,” he wrote. ‘Some of us have challenges you don’t see or backgrounds you’re not aware of.
“I hope that an effort can be made to understand, support and guide residents, rather than simply judging them and guiding them to their highest potential as physicians.”
But he also specifically warned his employers sternly.
“To be clear, there are other people here at GW who are at real risk,” West added. ‘There are other residents currently fighting a real life and death battle, a battle that is being waged both inside and outside the clinic/hospital.
“Often that struggle can produce symptoms that look very much like laziness, lack of motivation, or a waste of intelligence, all unforgivable sins in our profession.”
In his obituary, West’s family described his death as “unbelievably heartbreaking” as they paid tribute to their beloved son, brother and uncle.
“He was such a cheerful spirit and could always make us laugh, loved to have fun and always had a mischievous twinkle in his eye,” the obituary reads. ‘He was always up for adventure, in his own way.’
West was nicknamed ‘Iron Will’ because of his steely determination, which was evident even as a child
But his suicide note describes the enormous pressure at work, as well as his belief that access to mental health care would ultimately damage his career
In lieu of flowers, the family requested donations be made to Dr. Lorna Breene Heroes’ Foundation, which aims to support the mental health and wellbeing of medical staff.
The charity was founded in honor of the physician of the same name, Dr. Breene, who committed suicide after undergoing psychiatric treatment during the Covid-19 pandemic.
Her brother-in-law said she feared accessing treatment would mean her medical license would be revoked.
“You are faced with the decision of whether you will jeopardize your future career, which is often your mission in life to care for others and use your talents to do so, by caring for yourself in the way you know you would.” have to do. Stefanie Simmons, the organization’s chief medical officer, said.
In a statement, the hospital said the safety of all its students and staff “is the university’s highest priority.”
“At GW, like other medical training programs, we recognize that the residency experience can be personally challenging and that residents may require professional support for their well-being,” the statement said.
West is remembered as a caring, “fun spirit” who always made his loved ones laugh
West’s empty corner desk is decorated with flower arrangements and his hospital gown
“The University is aware of and is committed to eliminating the culturally ingrained stigma that has long hindered physicians’ willingness to seek help for sometimes life-threatening mental health conditions
‘The GW School of Medicine and Health Sciences (SMHS) provides resources to support residents’ physical, emotional/mental health and overall well-being – including free confidential consultations.’
But three months after West’s death, his colleagues held a rally for mental health benefits and better hours and pay.
Many said they identified with Will’s struggle but had encountered barriers to getting help at the hospital.
Although the university claims it is doing all it can, the empty corner office once occupied by West and now decorated with floral tributes is a poignant reminder of how desperate the situation can become.
If you or someone you know needs help, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline on 988.