This iPhone 16 Pro color rumor is making me sick…

I am not a complex guy, despite what my therapist (who lives in my head) claims; I like things to be simple and stark. I am a boring dark tee kind of guy. I don’t like beers that pretend to be liquid chocolate or mango. And I think Space Gray is the best iPhone color.

The rumor of a so-called ‘Desert Titanium’ color for the yet-unofficial but highly anticipated iPhone 16 Pro is making my stomach turn.

Maybe I’m just 187cm from a lack of imagination. Or maybe I have such a vision of aesthetics that I find a white room ambrosia to my eyes. But something about this tipped colour scheme rubs me the wrong way.

I’ve seen it advertised as a bronze color – which I’m not opposed to, as I’m currently testing out the rather nice Christopher Ward C63 Dune Bronze watch. But that’s made of real bronze and develops a patina, softening it from a slightly too yellowish hue to a warm brown.

In my time with the iPhone 15 Pro Max so far, however, I’ve found its titanium chassis to be nearly immune to smudging or marking (it’s even survived a few hard drops), let alone discoloration. That’s something I miss compared to the lovely iPhone 13 Pro.

So there’s no chance of a bronze-colored Desert Titanium iPhone 16 Pro developing a patina. Which means you’re stuck with a phone that stubbornly clings to a hue that’s neither the buttery yellow of caramel nor the warm glow of gold (I think gold iPhones have no place on this planet, by the way), but something sickly somewhere in between.

Tough bronze

Bronze is also the color of losers; don’t attack me.

It’s basically the second medal, which to me has a bigger sting than just a ribbon or certificate saying you’ve taken part. Bronze means you’ve done your best but still missed out on the higher podium places. And as a former British 200m freestyle bronze medallist, I know what it’s like to have that metal body around you.

The only exception is the bronze on the aforementioned watch, and even then it feels a bit try-hard with its desire to age quickly.

So yeah, I’m really not sold on the idea of ​​a Desert Titanium iPhone 16 Pro. I reserve the right to change my mind once I see the phone in person, because I’m fickle like that. And there’s more than enough room for this rumored shadow to never see the light of day.

Outside of Desert Titanium, the iPhone 16 Pro’s other colors seem to appeal to me the most. I was expecting gray, white, and Space Black hues, but Space Gray still isn’t here, much to my chagrin.

Of course, with the next Apple event scheduled for September 9 – check out our guide on how to watch the iPhone 16 launch event live – we’ll soon see which iPhone 16 rumors turn out to be true and which were complete bullshit. And Ny Breaking will be in Cupertino to cover the ‘It’s Glowtime’ event live, so I’m interested to see what my colleagues Lance Ulanoff and Jacob Krol think of the new iPhone 16 colors in general.

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