There is an objectively correct number of Minions, and this isn’t it

There is one specific Minion joke in Despicable Me 4 what I can’t stop thinking about. It’s so simple, but every time I think about it I laugh. Basically one of Gru’s Minions gets stuck in a vending machine and he can’t figure out how to get out. The entire movie. So he’s just constantly in the background of whatever is happening, sleeping on stacks of chips or reading a book called The vending machine dietMore crazy things are happening on screen, but he’s stuck behind glass.

It’s hilarious, but it made me realize that while Minion-filled scenes often descend into annoying nonsense, there is a proper way to use them, an ideal amount of Minion jokes to sprinkle in between other scenes — a Golden Ratio. The Minions were only a small part of the original 2010 Despicable Mebut they have since overshadowed former villain Gru and his family in the larger cultural landscape. But by putting them front and center, you miss what Minions do best.

The Despicable Me films work best on both a story and comedy level when filmmakers use the Minions sparingly and don’t overwhelm scenes with them. While the vending machine gag is one of the best pieces of business in Despicable Me 4it’s not the only Minion joke in the movie. Far from it.

The chaotic yellow guys are polarizing. Some people love them so much that they buy limited-edition Minion Crocs, build elaborate meme pages around them, or spend endless hours wondering what Minions taste like. Others have a visceral hatred for them, a rage that causes them to reject every Despicable Me franchise project. I used to place myself in the latter camp, but I’ve developed a grudging fondness for the bespectacled beans, thanks to a longstanding inside joke with a friend. Still, they’re never my favorite part of the Despicable Me films, which are more engaging and creative when they embrace wacky world-building around theatrical villainy like a day job.

That running background joke really highlighted how hilarious the Minions can be when they’re not the center of a scene. And I laughed out loud when Gru uses his little minions as a baby-care team, rushing in to change Gru Jr.’s diaper as if they were changing the tires on a race car. Those jokes work because they’re in the background of larger scenes, and they play off the other humorous antics going on, adding another layer of goofiness to an already weird world.

Scenes that are Minions and only Minions? There’s not enough contrast between the silly blobs and other slightly more grounded (but still quirky) characters. Scenes with just Minions are a bad feedback loop, reminiscent of when you put two voice enhancing imitation apps together and they turn a simple statement into an annoying cacophony. Minions just aren’t nuanced or variable enough to carry a scene if they’re the only things in it.

Image: Lighting

An example: in Despicable Me 4all the minions who are not Trapped in vending machines or serving as Gru’s pit stop crew, they take a bus to the headquarters of the Anti-Villain League, the spy agency where Gru (Steve Carell) and his wife Lucy (Kristen Wiig) work. They’re terrible bus riders, blowing bubbles, throwing a party, and annoying the bus driver, who gets up and tries to put them in their place. But the sheer mass of Minions quickly overwhelms him, rushing forward in a literal wave as they race toward the building. It’s a long scene where the Minions all melt into one pointless, gibberish-spewing entity. The film crew goes to great lengths to make that idea seem strange and vivid, but with any sense of character or specificity stripped away, it just ends up feeling like a drag. There’s nothing unexpected or interesting about the Minions as they literally dissolve into one big, yellow blur.

Scenes like this give the Minions their worst reputation. It doesn’t help that there are two Minion-centric spin-off movies built primarily on Minion-Minion interactions. After 30 interactions built around their high-pitched voices, gleeful cruelty to each other, and over-the-top carelessness, it’s hard to remember that they can actually be engaging and surprising when they’re allowed to have personality, or when they’re used to emphasize the main characters rather than being an endlessly repetitive side-story. Like any kind of particularly strong artificial seasoning, Minions can add some much-needed oomph to an otherwise dull movie scene. But rely on Minions too much, and even a decent movie will be drowned out by their sugary sweetness. Given how often Minions inundate the Despicable Me movies, it’s all too easy to forget what a good low dose of Minion antics can do for the soul.

Despicable Me 4 is now in theaters.