- Bernadette Purcell, 45, from New Jersey, is a licensed clinical social worker
- She regularly shares mental health advice for personal growth on TikTok
- Purcell recently shared the five components of an untrustworthy person
A mental health therapist has revealed the warning signs of someone being untrustworthy that go beyond catching them in a lie.
Bernadette Purcell, 45, from New Jersey, is a licensed clinical social worker and author of the self-help book Divorced As F* In Seven Spiritual Steps.
The content creator known as @therapiebernhas nearly 70,000 followers on TikTok, where she regularly shares mental health advice to promote personal growth.
In one of her videos she outlined the five components of unreliable people to watch out for in your relationships.
Therapist Bernadette Purcell, 45, from New Jersey, outlined the five components of unreliable people to look out for in your relationships
Purcell warned that you should be wary of anyone who ‘makes excuses for their actions’ and refuses to take responsibility (stock image)
Purcell first advised being wary of someone who “makes excuses for their actions” and refuses to take responsibility.
She noted that an unreliable person will ‘blaming others for situations they find themselves in.’
The therapist explained in one last video that someone who takes no responsibility ‘sees everything as an attack’ and will ‘adapt to the circumstances.’
She gave an example of a friend who went on the attack after you calmly told them they had hurt your feelings.
Purcell demonstrated how they would try to deflect and say something dismissive to undermine the other’s feelings.
‘Oh, you’re so sensitive. Besides, that was two days ago… You know how stressed I was that day,” she said, pretending to be the friend in question.
The expert warned that an untrustworthy person will try to “change or rewrite history to make themselves look better.”
“Every situation seems to put them in this amazing light,” she said.
Purcell explained that they will also “change or rewrite history to make themselves look better” and “use guilt or flattery to get what they want.”
Purcell added that they will also rely on manipulation and “use guilt or flattery to get what they want.”
Finally, she pointed out that untrustworthy people “lie a lot.”
“That may seem obvious,” she said. “But what is not clear is that they are finding it very difficult to keep their promises.”
Purcell shared another clip that many people ask her how to know who to trust and when to trust, especially if they are just getting out of a relationship.
Quoting author Charlie Wardle, she said: ‘A bird sitting in a tree is never afraid of the branch breaking, because it does not rely on the branch, but on its own wings. Always believe in yourself.’
“When you emphasize trusting yourself, the actions of others become a lot less important,” she explained.
“Because the trust here is that no matter what comes your way, you trust yourself to know that you can handle it.
‘So concentrate on your own flying ability and not on the branch.’