A relationship expert has revealed the sexual goals all couples should have to improve their intimacy.
Todd Baratz, from the US, is a licensed sex therapist and shared his tips that couples should embrace to spice up their sex life and overcome issues in the bedroom.
The psychotherapist’s goals included having conversations about fantasies and kinks, as well as planning sex, giving your partner sexy surprises, and expressing desire for your partner outside of the bedroom.
He also recommended making noise and talking while doing the deed, learning how to masturbate each other, and saying “lovingly” no to sex.
Todd, who has specialized in relationships and sex for 13 years, said that while many couples experience sexual problems, very few communicate about sex.
Todd Baratz (pictured) is a licensed sex therapist and shared his tips couples should embrace to spice up their sex lives and overcome issues in the bedroom
“These challenges could include a decrease in sex drive, difficulty coping with varying levels of sexual desire, or timing issues,” he wrote in an Instagram post. after.
“Sex is a quintessential relational issue that couples must anticipate in any long-term relationship, similar to other challenges that may arise.”
To combat these problems. which, according to Todd, are “typical relational issues that couples should anticipate in any long-term relationship.” he offered eight goals to strive for.
His first tip is to have ongoing conversations about sex, eroticism, kink, and fantasy.
Good sex requires good communication. No special technique, taste or Olympic position,” he explained.
“Most people are uncomfortable talking openly about sex because they’ve just never done it.”
Todd advised couples to “push through” any discomfort and start talking as soon as possible and to remember, it’s not just one conversation, but multiple and ongoing chats that will break the barrier.
The sex therapist’s second goal is to teach others how to satisfy yourself by calling masturbation the “GPS of Pleasure, Excitement, and Orgasm.”
“People don’t automatically know how your body works without being told and most genitals need their own unique types of stimulation to get pleasure,” Todd wrote.
He said not only to make a sound of approval when something feels right, but to “literally demonstrate” what they should do by guiding a partner’s hand and showing them where to go.
Third, Todd told couples to try expressing their desire for each other outside of sex by texting, taking notes, or whispering in each other’s ear if their partner is thought to be good looking.
Todd encourages people in intimate relationships to create sexual surprises for each other, whether it’s putting on a certain outfit or whispering exciting words
“Desire isn’t just something that happens during sex. It can happen all the time if you let it. Capitalize and make sure your partner knows you want them on a regular basis,” he said.
According to Todd, the best sex is usually expected rather than spontaneous, so it’s important to schedule it regularly.
“Set a time, send nasty sexts up the run, plan exactly what you’re going to do, build that tension and excitement,” he suggested.
“Keep in mind that scheduling sex doesn’t have to be a calendar invite, it can be a simple verbal appointment for some fun.”
Todd encourages people in intimate relationships to create sexual surprises for each other, whether it’s dressing in a certain outfit you know your partner likes or whispering exciting words.
‘Surprise them, be creative. Nothing is sexier than knowing that your partner wants to please you and has done something especially for your pleasure,” he said.
Another goal Todd says is important to achieve is learning how to “lovingly” say no to sex.
According to Todd, the best sex is usually expected rather than spontaneous, so it’s important to schedule it regularly
“Don’t mean ‘NO!’, say ‘You’re hot, I love you and love having sex with you, but I’m tired/bloated/not in the mood’. Be nice!’ he advised.
“Remember, it can hurt when an offer for attention — sexual or otherwise — is rejected. So use common sense and be nice.’
A normal part of any long-term relationship, says Todd, is that different levels of desire between couples and sex drive diminish over time.
“Develop strategies to deal with and cope with the differences. This is crucial or sex will be filled with resentment and fear. Not hot,’ he said.
Finally, the relationship expert said not to be quiet, but to make noise and talk to each other while they were at it.
‘Make noises. Breathe, talk dirty, push boundaries. Also, ask your partner what they like,” he said.
“Make sure you tell your partner the words that turn you on/off, especially when it comes to your body and genitals.”