Whether it’s a one night stand or a long-term affair, cheating has been the heartbreaking downfall of many relationships.
But scientists say there is more than one way a person can be unfaithful to their partner.
In an analysis of more than 300 studies, researchers at Stony Brook University found three different types of infidelity, most of which involve no sexual activity at all.
In addition to sex, cheaters can also engage in “electronic infidelity” by sexting or participating in online relationships.
Partners can also cheat by forging deep emotional bonds with someone outside their relationship.
This form of adultery appears to be even more common than sexual cheating, with 35 percent of men and 30 percent of women admitting to ‘romantic infidelity’.
The researchers warn that this could lead to a situation where partners have very different ideas about what counts as cheating.
Lead author Dr Benjamin says: ‘For the average person, this underlines the importance of clear communication in romantic relationships about boundaries and exclusivity expectations.’
ROMANTIC INFIDELITY: Dave Grohl (right) recently admitted to cheating on his wife Jordyn Blum (left) and fathering a secret baby with another woman. Researchers say that developing deep emotional relationships with someone other than your partner is a common and particularly harmful form of infidelity, which does not always include sexual behavior.
As simple as cheating seems, scientists have found that definitions and beliefs about infidelity can vary widely.
In a meta-analysis of research on the topic of infidelity, researchers collected 305 different articles that contained data on the rate of infidelity.
The resulting dataset included interviews and surveys of more than 500,000 people and provided new insights into the different forms of cheating.
Of those surveyed, 25 percent of men and 14 percent of women admitted to having been sexually unfaithful.
Dr. However, Warach and his colleagues write in their article published in Personal Relationships: “Forms of infidelity that include non-sexual components are at least as common, if not more common, than infidelity that is purely sexual in nature.”
Electronic cheating, which includes behaviors such as online flirting or engaging in sexual conversations over the Internet, is admitted by 23 percent of men and 14 percent of women.
According to the research, this has only become more common in recent years as the use of social media and digital technologies have become more widespread.
Similarly, twice as many women admitted to having been romantically unfaithful as to having had a sexual relationship with someone other than their partner.
SEXUAL INFIDELITY: Kevin Hart (right) admitted to having sexual relations with another woman while his wife Eniko Parrish Hart (left) was pregnant. Sexual activity outside the relationship is the most recognizable and most studied form of infidelity, but researchers say it may not be the most common.
Despite how common these forms of adultery were, they were also the most overlooked by researchers.
Only 9.5 percent of the studies included in the meta-analysis addressed emotional infidelity, while electronic infidelity was addressed in only 5.6 percent.
What makes this particularly problematic is that both digital and emotional cheating can be just as, if not more, harmful than sexual forms of infidelity.
The researchers point out that a partner may feel more betrayed if he discovers that his partner is in a long-term romantic relationship than if he learns about a short-term indiscretion.
Yet the data collected in this analysis also points to a surprising lack of taboos surrounding non-sexual forms of cheating.
Previous research shows that people are much more likely to admit to sexual infidelity when they are anonymous than during in-person or telephone interviews.
However, when discussing romantic infidelity, there was no difference between anonymous and personal methods.
The researchers write: ‘The absence of this finding for emotional infidelity is consistent with research suggesting that it is less stigmatized than sexual infidelity.’
ELECTRONIC INFIDELITY: Former footballer and BBC Sport presenter Jermaine Jenas (left) admitted sending inappropriate text messages to women at the BBC while married to Ellie Penfold (right). This form of infidelity has become increasingly common with the rise of social media and can involve online flirting, having sexual conversations or exchanging explicit images.
Combined with a lack of communication about what counts as infidelity, this can lead to serious relationship problems.
Dr. Warach tells PsyPost: “Research has previously shown that individuals have widely varying perceptions of what these terms mean.
“What one person considers ‘infidelity’ may be different from what their partner understands.”
However, the problem with defining infidelity is not only influences partners in their relationships, but also scientists trying to understand the psychology of deception.
Of the 305 articles examined, about 30 percent used extremely vague terms such as “cheated on” or “been unfaithful.”
This leaves it unclear whether the infidelity in question was sexual, electronic or emotional in nature.
Dr. Warach concludes: ‘Our research shows that inconsistent definitions and measurement methods contribute to confusion about the prevalence of romantic infidelity in the research literature.
‘This is a major problem for our research field.’