The seven signs your husband is having an affair with a work colleague by relationship expert CHARLOTTE FOX WEBER

A shocking number of extramarital affairs begin in the workplace – some studies put the figure as high as 85 percent – ​​and it’s no surprise given that many of us spend more time at work than at home.

One reason is proximity. Men can be remarkably unimaginative and lazy when it comes to who they set their sights on, and they can be influenced by someone they see every day in the office.

You’re more likely to connect with someone you spend a lot of time with, especially if there’s conflict (or even boredom) at home. Plus, flirting can be a way to make your job seem more fun and amusing, but our natural human tendency to eroticize stressful situations means that harmless crushes can quickly spiral out of control.

One of the reasons that workplace affairs can be so insidious is that the office is a relatively easy place to hide an affair. Any sexual interaction can be easily hidden behind the seemingly virtuous cloak of “staying late.”

Worse, it can convince you that you’re doing the right thing by continuing to work hard – and provide for your family – and having some fun along the way.

So if your partner is glued to his phone by the pool this summer, or even answering “work calls” while on vacation, these are the signs he could be hiding something…

He stays late at the office

The concept of ‘overtime’ is a grey area, where a man has complete freedom to live his adventures.

Meetings are one thing, and working overtime to meet a pressing deadline is just as acceptable, but if he mumbles something vague about staying late to “network,” he may be abusing an ambiguous space that could encompass anything from a fun night out without you to hours of chatting.

It’s perfectly reasonable to ask what exactly overtime entails, but don’t accept a suspicious answer and be prepared for him to react nervously or defensively.

HIS ‘TIME REPORTING’ IS BAD

You might be suspicious if quick meetings always run late, he repeatedly misses his train, unexpectedly has to extend a work trip, or is constantly stuck in traffic. He might be blurring the lines to extend his time with someone special. The only way to know for sure is to ask him directly.

He may have legitimate reasons, he may even be a terrible timekeeper, but he should always be reachable by phone – preferably FaceTime (so you can see exactly where he is). Working late and being unreachable is a big red flag.

REPEATEDLY REFERENCES TO A WORK COLLEAGUE

It’s okay to talk about people at work even if you’ve never met them. But if one name keeps coming up, there may be cause for concern.

Men can be surprisingly unimaginative and lazy when it comes to who they set their sights on, and they can be influenced by someone they see every day in the office.

Whatever the work-related story – challenges, tasks, deadlines, jokes – if all roads lead to this specific person, you could be in trouble.

Be extra alert to boring details (maybe her dog is sick or she’s having a fight with a plumber) that might come up as a highlight of the conversation or a point of contention.

If he tells a lot of stories that you don’t find interesting at all, but they are always about one particular woman, then he is looking for an excuse to talk about her. That could be a sign that he has become obsessed.

He suddenly became smarter

Keep an eye on his work wardrobe and be curious if your suit-wearing man suddenly starts paying more attention to his appearance, upgrading his shirts and shoes, checking himself in the mirror before he leaves the house. Yes, he may be looking for a promotion, but he could also be dressing to impress another woman.

He is suddenly very enthusiastic about his work

If his previously boring and stressful job now seems fun and rewarding and he walks out the door with an upbeat stride, this new enthusiasm may come from a stronger bond with a coworker.

A high-stress work environment can cause coworkers to interact in ways they normally wouldn’t. If he’s putting in a lot of extra effort at work, it’s worth asking what’s causing his sudden change of heart.

He is unexpectedly strangely protective

Watch for signs that he has become unusually protective of a coworker and shows concern for him/her when he/she feels disconnected from his/her family at home.

If this is bothering you, express it with a well-meaning question such as, “I’ve noticed you’re becoming increasingly concerned about XXX, she’s clearly going through a hard time, can you tell me why you’re so concerned? Is there anything I can do to help?”

AN OVERFRIENDLY COLLEAGUE

He may appreciate a warm and friendly work environment that encourages regular family interaction, but it may be wise to be a little suspicious if a coworker becomes overly friendly with you and your children.

It could be a subtle sign that the object of his professional love is fantasizing about a home life with your husband. Lavishing affection on your children could be a sign that she is “auditioning” for a potential role as a future stepmother.

• As told to LOUISE ATKINSON