The grandmothers who go to court to gain access to their grandchildren, revealed by top lawyer – who says they pay up to £30,000 and tells the tactics that work

I am a grandmother of six beautiful children and I cannot believe how lonely this summer will be for millions of grandparents, who are unable to see their grandchildren of divorcing parents.

The number of grandparents seeking legal advice on this issue has exploded. Grandparents who were the backbone of a family, who had a close, loving relationship with their grandchildren, are being brutally cut off as a result of a divorce.

When a rift gets out of hand, they can pay a high price and be punished brutally.

And the sad victims, I regret to say, are also the millions of children who suddenly find themselves in an emotional tundra, deprived of the beautiful bond with their grandparents.

My company’s research has shown that in most cases of divorce, the conflict is between the woman and her mother-in-law. The conflict is mainly the result of attempts to punish the sons and future ex-husbands.

Grandparents with large budgets, who often pay school fees and care for children without pay, do not take it lightly.

When they come to me, they are willing to spend tens of thousands of dollars to regain access.

One of my clients, whom we will call Agatha, had lost her husband Andrew. As a relatively young widow, she found solace in her close relationship with her three grandchildren – Chloe, Samantha and George. They adored her. She spent time with them most days and they often stayed with her. She took them to museums and the theatre and enjoyed spending time researching fun activities she could do with them.

She was the cheerful grandmother, who always paid attention to their needs and always treated them appropriately.

Imagine the unbearable stress it caused when their mother announced she wanted to divorce their father and within a week refused to see their grandmother again.

To make matters worse, she applied for a “restriction order” against her husband and his mother, which prevents someone from making decisions about the upbringing of a child. She falsely claimed that Agatha posed a risk to the children.

Agatha refused to run away, but she paid a high price. She had to provide detailed evidence that her daughter-in-law’s claims were completely untrue. It cost around £30,000 to prove that her daughter-in-law had lied to gain an advantage in the divorce.

The case dragged on for over a year and the grandchildren became so alienated from their mother’s destructive plans that Agatha has not seen them since.

She is devastated that the children have suffered a double loss – through their parents’ divorce and the loss of their relationship with her – and the impact that will have on them.

In another heartbreaking case, it didn’t matter that Sarah and Manny provided childcare and housework for their two grandsons so their daughter could work three days a week. When the divorce took place, they were no longer allowed to see the boys.

They sought legal advice and began a painful, expensive process, which involved seeking permission from a court to see the children, followed by an application for child support.

Children can suffer a double loss, through the divorce of their parents and the loss of their relationship with their grandparents

Sarah and Manny provided evidence that their grandchildren would secretly call them to tell them they missed them and beg them to visit their grandparents. Every moment, Sarah told me, was torture for her grandchildren—especially one with ADHD, for whom change is particularly painful. Not seeing his grandparents was so stressful that he was doing poorly in school.

The court agreed to let them see the children every week. It cost most of their savings, but they say the joy of cuddles from the boys has been worth every penny. But Sarah and Manny are the lucky ones. The UK is lagging behind in this regard. The European Convention, to which Britain is a signatory, recognises the right of every grandchild to have grandparents in their lives.

But at the moment it costs too much money to realize this for the many big names.

parents who are involved in the divorce proceedings of their adult offspring.

Did you spend a fortune to see your grandchild? Email: money@mailonsunday.co.uk