Like WandaVision for it, one of the nice quirks of Agatha all the time puts a new spin on it thing in every episode. In this case, rather than a TV show format, it’s the song “The Ballad of the Witches’ Road,” which for a while gave us about one new cover per episode.
Coming from songwriters Robert Lopez and Kristen Anderson-Lopez – known for ‘Let It Go’, original song ‘Agatha All Along’ and other similar earworms – it’s no surprise that ‘The Ballad of the Witches’ Road’ is infectious is. good and keeps replaying in my head.
But which Witches’ Way (ba-dum tss) is best to search? Well, after many, many, a lot of listening, here are my official rankings (will be updated as we collect more covers).
Disqualified: The D23 cover
I don’t know what it is about the live version, but even though it’s really just the Sacred Chant version, out of context it feels a bit weird! I don’t know why! Anyway, I’m not officially counting it because it wasn’t performed in the text of the show, and having that context lifts it out of that weird liminal space.
5. ‘The ballad of the witches’ road (cover version)’
Okay, Kathryn Hahn does an admirable job helming this cover, but that’s not it rather the 70s soft rock version that was supposed to be Lorna’s version of the ballad. There’s still a lot of Musical Theater™ in Hahn’s voice, and while the song itself is inherently good, it still feels like the show choir version of a Fleetwood Mac song. I appreciate that in the context of the episode it’s a very powerful moment where Alice acknowledges that the song was written to protect her, but while the instrumentation is good, the vocals undermine the rock energy.
4. ‘The Ballad of the Witches’ Road’ (pop version)
I love a Japanese breakfast as much as the next half-Asian, half-white girl who cried while reading Crying in H-Martbut unfortunately this cover doesn’t really do it for me. It’s definitely better than the “cover” cover; the vocals feel more cohesive in terms of the genre the song is trying to emulate. However, it doesn’t really do anything to really sell it as the “pop” version, or even enough to differentiate it from the Lorna Wu version, other than having a new singer. It’s fun! But not as distinctive as the other versions of the song.
3. ‘The Ballad of the Witches’ Road (True Crime Version)’
I didn’t even fully clock this one as a cover of “Witches’ Road” when it popped up on my Spotify shuffle recently (in my defense, they’re confusing “witches” with “squiggle”). Rock singer Matthew Mayfield adds a beautiful and raw quality to the song, and it really just fits the genre it’s intended for. This could definitely be the intro to a detective drama! Still, it deserves its place here on the list, because it really isn’t witchy enough.
2. ‘The Ballad of the Witches’ Road (Lorna Wu’s version)’
Now this is the 70’s soft rock/Fleetwood Mac vibe I was looking for! The bridge in particular gives Stevie Nicks in the 1976 live recording of “Rhiannon” right when she gets all intense. This version is sung by South Korean singer Seo Moon Tak, who is known for her powerful voice and wide vocal range, and damn, it shows! We don’t really hear the full version of this in the show, which is a shame because it really evokes the musical genre it should be.
1. ‘The Ballad of the Witches’ Road (Sacred Chant Version)’
It’s horrifying. It’s creepy. It has all the actresses fully flexing their singing chops in beautiful and haunting harmonies. It’s also the wittiest of all the versions! This is the one that gets added to Halloween party playlists, the one that’s on a Spotify daily list called “spooky witchy sunday afternoon” or something like that. It’s beautiful, but also disturbing as witches should be! Even Mrs. Hart, who doesn’t know the lyrics, can join in here! It’s the quintessential version of the song – and deservedly the best. At least for now.