Tesla update brings 12 fun features to its EVs – including a ‘screaming goat’ lock sound
Rumors have been swirling around Tesla's Holiday Update 2023 in recent weeks, with friendly hackers on
Traditionally, Tesla's festive software update usually includes some new features, and this year's rollout is no different. The company has now confirmed no fewer than twelve updates that should keep Musk's EV customers satisfied.
While it doesn't appear that any real-time routing functionality such as “avoid roadworks on route” has been added this time around, Tesla owners will at least be able to make their vehicle sound like a goat when they lock it. Here are all 12 of those updates for Tesla's electric vehicles (some of which may be limited by the model you own)…
1. Custom lock sounds
The update provides the option to choose a custom sound that sounds when locking the car – if your car is equipped with an external speaker (not all).
Are you tired of the typical “beep, beep”? Well, Tesla offers things like an old-fashioned horn, a round of applause, and the sound of a goat screaming. It's probably funny once, but then very embarrassing. Anyway, this is the car you can fart in, so what do you expect?
2. New Arcade Features
There have been a number of updates to Tesla's in-car Arcade offering, which is easily the best gaming experience found in any vehicle right now.
Tesla says the update unlocks new vehicles and tracks Beach buggy racing, Polytopia And Vampire survivors both get new modes and PS4, PS5 and Xbox controllers now offer a rumble effect when paired via Bluetooth.
3. Party in the back
Tesla vehicles equipped with a rear screen can now also play games from the Tesla Arcade.
A message from Tesla on X, formerly Twitter, has the headline “LAN Party on Wheels”, implying multiplayer functionality, where the front occupants can battle the zombie apocalypse with those in the back. That's one way to do it kill a trip (sorry).
4. Drowning out the kids
As for the rear screens, Tesla has also ensured that rear passengers can now use wireless Bluetooth headphones when watching shows or playing games on the rear screen.
This is an absolute boon for parents, who previously had to endure the soundtrack of what came out of the screen. Probably Blippi.
5. Apple podcasts
A fairly basic one, but Tesla's infotainment now hosts the Apple Podcasts app, allowing users to seamlessly pick up where they left off on any Apple device.
6. Speed cameras on the road
As predicted, Tesla is adding a number of 'Waze-like' features to in-car navigation, including the ability to show speed cameras and red traffic lights on the road.
Strangely enough, the selected images even resemble those from Waze. However, it has not yet been confirmed whether this update will include mobile speed cameras or just fixed speed cameras, nor is it stated which regions it will be rolled out to.
7. Trip planning from your smartphone
It's surprising that it's taken Tesla this long to offer this feature, considering many of those old-school automakers have offered the ability to plan a route in a smartphone app and send it straight to the vehicle's infotainment screen. . The Kia EV6 can do it, and now Tesla owners can too.
8. Automatic 911 calls
Again, this feels very much like an update for North America, as it's still unclear whether this will work in other markets. But if you unexpectedly have an accident in which the airbags are deployed, your Tesla will now automatically connect you to the 911 emergency services.
9. Sentry mode gets extended views
Sentry mode is perfect for catching the person who bumps a shopping cart into your parked Tesla. Sentry mode streams images from the numerous built-in cameras to the smartphone app when the vehicle is parked.
Thanks to this update, owners can now access the left and right pillar cameras, bringing the total corner coverage to seven.
10. Park Assist becomes hi-fi
Following the software update, Tesla's Park Assist can now create a 3D construction of the vehicle's surroundings and then display it on the infotainment display, making parking in busy environments easier.
11. Let there be light
As far as we know, Tesla is the only vehicle that lets you program a custom light show, upload it to a USB drive, and then have the car flash its headlights, taillights, and turn signals in a rhythmic display of technological prowess.
This update brings with it a pre-programmed light show that flashes to the tune The arrival by Irving Victoria. Why? Because.
12. Loading location filters
Finding those fast Supercharger stations just got easier with this update. Owners can now filter between two charging speeds.
Three lightning bolts indicate locations offering speeds of 70 kW or more, while the single lightning bolt indicates stations with outlets of 70 kW or less.
Analysis: Tesla is the GOAT of software updates
Say what you like about Tesla as a company, criticize the holes in its vehicle's panels and slam the CEO for his online outbursts, but it's very hard to blame the company when it comes to OTA updates. These 'patches' leave traditional automakers in the dust with their ability to add increasingly fun and often very useful features.
Again, it looks like the Holiday Update will bring a number of features that will make even older Teslas easier to use. We've added twelve major updates above, but the software download brings many more, including an automatic blind spot camera, the ability to shuffle playback in Tidal, and the addition of search in the built-in digital owner's manual.
These may sound like minor changes to some, but compared to those of VW, Ford and many more, it's a night and day difference. To put it in perspective, Tesla tends to release an update almost every month, while VW's ID series is now almost five years old and we are on ID software 3.0.