Tennis legend Jelena Dokic shares impassioned message about asking women about having children as she urges people to ‘be kinder’: ‘Don’t let anyone shame you’
Jelena Dokic has shared a passionate message about conversations surrounding women having children, urging people to have more ’empathy’.
The tennis legend, 41, shared a lengthy post on Instagram on Thursday detailing her numerous experiences of people asking her if she wants to have children.
In the heartfelt post, Jelena urged people to ‘be kinder’ as she revealed she had to deal with people’s ‘shocked’ reactions when they learned she doesn’t have children.
She told how she has “made peace” with the fact she doesn’t want to have children, but slammed the “shame and stigma” in society around women who don’t have children.
Jelena criticized people for asking women “inappropriate” questions about the sensitive topic and urged them to have “empathy” as they never know what someone has been through.
Jelena Dokic has shared a passionate message about conversations surrounding women having children as she urged people to have more ’empathy’
Alongside a photo of herself, Jelena wrote: ‘Women who have children and are mothers!!! Some people need to be nicer when it comes to asking women about having children.
‘I don’t mind the questions about whether I have children or whether I want children. Not at all. But I do mind the shocked faces of people, especially men, when they find out that I am 41 and have no children.
“First of all, be kind, because you don’t know why I don’t have them, won’t have them, or can’t get them.
“Maybe I couldn’t do it, maybe I tried and it didn’t work out, maybe I wasn’t lucky enough to find someone to do it with, maybe I’m afraid of it because of my youth or I’m afraid of having a raising a child as a single mother.
“And sometimes people can’t even afford to have children, or they’ve just tried everything and it didn’t work, which is very painful.
The tennis pro, 41, shared a photo of herself (above) on Instagram alongside a lengthy post detailing her countless experiences of people asking her if she wants to have children.
In the heartfelt post, Jelena urged people to ‘be kinder’ as she revealed she faced people’s ‘shocked’ reactions when they learned she doesn’t have children
‘You never know what happened to someone, what the reasons are and what he has been through.’
Jelena then slammed the “stigma” surrounding women who don’t have children, criticizing people for still valuing a woman’s “worth” based on whether she is a mother.
She continued, “Second, does it really matter? Does a woman who has children and is a mother define who she is? Is a woman worth less if she has no children? And the answer is a big NO.
“But unfortunately we still live in a world where that defines us, women, whether we are worthy of it or not. We have to be mothers to be worthy or to meet a certain standard.
‘This has to stop. The story, the shame and the stigma must stop. So be kind and show a little empathy when you ask women about having children and motherhood.
Jelena criticized people for asking women ‘inappropriate’ questions about this sensitive topic and urged them to have ’empathy’ as they never know what someone has been through
‘It is a very painful subject for many and you never know what someone has gone through and how much pain they carry with them.
‘I won’t have children, that won’t happen to me and I’m fine with that. I’m okay with that, but I’m not okay with people’s shocked faces.
‘As if you want to say why, what is wrong with you and how come you haven’t had children? What have you been waiting for? That’s what I and every woman don’t deserve. So have some empathy and kindness. Point.
“This is for all the women who have to put up with inappropriate questions and looks about motherhood, and for all the women who for one reason or another don’t want or can’t have children.
“You are worthy and don’t let anyone shame you for not having children.”
She told how she has “made peace” with not wanting to have children, but decried the “shame and stigma” in society surrounding women who don’t have children
In the comments, she was flooded with messages of support from her followers and other women, detailing the similar experiences they too have had to go through.
They wrote: ‘Beautifully written. It’s hard when people ask questions, make inappropriate comments, or just assume you have kids, or just don’t understand why you don’t. Not their business.’;
‘Inspirational Jelena, keep doing it! Your amazing, strong, resilient, beautiful, smart and one of the most understanding hearts!’;
‘Thank you Jelena. Your words really made my night for personal reasons’; Thank you Jelena. This is just right.’