LLike many, I have watched reports of the violent attack on Bondi Junction with shock, horror and disbelief. My heart goes out to the people involved, the courageous first responders and to those who lost loved ones in this tragic event.
I also sympathize with those who witnessed the horrors and I will figure out how they can get through the initial shock and put it behind them over time.
Pain and strong emotional reactions are common after these types of mass violent events.
But different people will have different emotional responses – and some may experience a range of varying emotions.
The first few days and weeks
In the days and weeks after traumatic events like these, people often experience… range of emotions: from fear and anxiety, anger, sadness and grief to disbelief and numbness, guilt and safety concerns. They may be nervous, more irritable or tense, or it may affect their sleep.
For many, their sense of risk may be heightened, especially since such random violence occurred during such an ordinary event: shopping on a Saturday afternoon. This can lead to an increased awareness of danger and concern for safety.
What is likely to happen over time?
For most people, as they begin to process and understand what happened, these feelings will gradually decrease in intensity and people will begin to recover. Research shows the majority of people recover from mass violent events within the first few months.
But for people who have been more directly exposed to the trauma, these events and reactions can be more difficult to process. Some people may develop mental health problems, most commonly anxiety, depression and post-traumatic stress disorder.
Understandably, those who are more at risk are people who were present during the trauma and experienced an immediate threat, as well as those who witnessed the violence or aftermath, first responders (paramedics and police), and those whose loved ones were injured or were lost during the event. .
People who have had more intense emotional reactions during the trauma, or who have had previous psychological problems or traumatic experiences, may also be at greater risk.
What helps – and hinders – your recovery?
To help process these traumatic events and promote recovery, social support is particularly important.
Spending time with trusted family and friends can help people process the events and their emotional reactions. Talking about your feelings with supportive people can help you understand and accept them. But even if you don’t want to talk about your feelings, spending time with loved ones is helpful.
It’s also okay to need some time to be alone, but try not to isolate or withdraw.
If you can’t talk about your feelings, don’t try to bottle them up and deal with them by using alcohol or drugs. Find another way of expressing them – whether through writing, art or music, or through practice.
Give yourself permission and time to feel these emotions. Remind yourself that you just experienced something extremely traumatic, take things day by day and don’t expect too much of yourself. Try not to judge yourself by your actions or how you handle them.
Provide some structure in your day, set small goals and increase your self-care: eat well, rest (even if you can’t sleep well), try yoga or relaxation. When you are ready, try to return to your normal routine.
Seek information from trusted sources, but try to do just that avoid becoming full through images or stories about the trauma, especially explicit images or speculation that are common on social media.
What if children saw it too?
If your children are affected, reassure them that they are safe and loved. When they are ready, talk to them gently about the trauma, acknowledge it, and answer their questions.
Encourage them to express their feelings and spend more time together in family activities.
Importantly, you try to limit their exposure to graphic images and depictions of the events in the media and on social media.
When should you seek mental health care?
Seek professional mental health help if you experience persistent problems with your emotional responses, or if you have unpleasant memories of the trauma, sleep problems or nightmares, or if you want to avoid things that remind you of the traumatic event.
Not everyone needs professional mental health care, but if you are experiencing these types of post-traumatic stress reactions a few weeks after the trauma, it is important to talk to your doctor and seek professional help from psychologists or counseling services.
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Kim Felmingham is chair of clinical psychology at the University of Melbourne. This article was originally published in the conversation