SNL Cold Open Features Exclusive Globe Interview: ‘I Can’t Believe I’m Joe’s Osama’

Saturday Night Live mocked the nation’s fixation on a Chinese spy balloon that has been flying over the country for the past few days.

In a hastily written and arranged sketch, the show’s audience joked about their obsession with the object and its subsequent appearance on Saturday.

A missile attack sent the balloon into the Atlantic Ocean off the coast of South Carolina.

SNL kicked off their show with a mock news report on the latest developments with MSNBC reporter Katy Tur, played by Chloe Fineman, trying to provide viewers with analysis.

Tur also had the chance to exclusively interview the balloon himself, played by none other than Asian cast member Bowen Yang.

‘Our long national nightmare is over. We have the balloon,” Tur announced.

“The discovery of the massive surveillance balloon earlier this week inflamed already volatile US-China relations, with many on the right calling the Biden administration’s response soft.

Tur mocked the right-wing hysteria by pointing to Donald Trump Jr. joke tweets that read: “If my dad was president there would be no balloons!!!!!!” and one by Marjorie Taylor Greene saying, ‘Look, it’s the real moon!’

Tur first interviewed Pentagon officer and aviation expert General William Hamilton, played by Kenan Thompson, who deadpanned, “We popped the balloon.”

‘General, we have never seen an object like this enter our airspace before. How did that happen?’ Tur asked.

Hamilton responded: ‘That’s an excellent question, Katy. Somehow the balloon was able to get past our West Coast anti-balloon defense system: the Seattle Space Needle.

“But once it was here, we were able to keep an eye on it with our sophisticated tracking technology to do this,” he said as he looked up, drawing laughter from the audience.

The General showed a 3D rendering of the balloon which turned out to be an inflatable toy balloon.

“I want everyone to know that we will not tolerate any form of Chinese espionage,” the general said. ‘But to be honest, they have everything you need from TikTok, so scroll on kids!’

Tur then addressed the wreckage of the balloon itself, with whom the network had secured a live interview.

‘Well, you’ve got me! Congratulations, you shot a balloon,’ Yang’s balloon sneered.

“Well, I’m sorry you’re in the water, but thanks for talking to us,” Tur told the balloon, which was being attacked by seagulls.

‘I entertained them for four days, but then Biden shot me down! I can’t believe I’m Joe’s Osama,’ wailed the balloon.

What were you doing flying over Montana? Tur asked.

‘I love the Yellowstone show, so I was there. It’s like Succession, but on the outside. Now I’m all wet, so… what a day! answered the globe.

In fact, I’m surprised you’re still floating. The experts said that you are the size of three buses,” Tur said.

‘Well. Oh. I’m a balloon, so that’s my body. How would you like someone to measure your width on buses? Sorry, I’m not ready for the camera,” the balloon replied tersely, apparently offended by the comment about the weight.

“I’m sorry, people were worried they were being spied on,” Tur said.

‘For me, a balloon. Everyone is constantly being watched, but it’s always “shoot the balloon”, and never unplug Alexa! If you care so much about your data, why do you keep your bank password in your notes app?

“Well, we just did what we had to do to protect the security of our country,” Tur explained.

‘Because? Is everyone freaking out because I’m a Chinese balloon? Because where I come from, I’m just a balloon,’ Yang claimed in her peculiar guise.

You’ve made it very clear that I’m not welcome here, so good job. Let me tell you something. You’re going to miss this Chinese spy balloon… I mean, a regular balloon!

Back in the real world, just hours before SNL was set to air, the US military announced how it had shot the balloon off the coast of Carolina after it passed through sensitive military sites in North America.

China insisted the flyover was an accident involving a civilian aircraft and threatened repercussions.

President Joe Biden issued the order, but wanted the balloon shot down even earlier, on Wednesday.

It was told that the best time for the operation would be when it was over the water, US officials said.

Military officials determined that shooting it down on the ground from an altitude of 60,000 feet would pose an undue risk to people on the ground.

China responded that it reserved the right to “take further action” and criticized the US for “an obvious overreaction and a serious violation of international practice.”

In its statement on Sunday, China’s Ministry of Foreign Affairs said that “China will resolutely uphold the legitimate rights and interests of the relevant company, and at the same time reserve the right to take additional measures in response.”

The balloon’s presence in US skies this week dealt a heavy blow to already strained US-China relations, which have been on a downward spiral for years.

prompted Secretary of State Antony Blinken to abruptly cancel a high-risk trip to Beijing intended to ease tensions.

“They successfully shot it down and I want to congratulate our Airmen who did it,” Biden said after getting off Air Force One en route to Camp David.