Money can’t buy love. And when it comes to the furnishings of your home, it can’t buy proof that you’re classy.
Of course, you might want to outfit your home with the kind of flashy, look-at-me decor usually shown in celebrity magazines. But the real signs of a home owned by someone with a chic pedigree are much more subtle.
We spoke to leading industry professionals, including interior design experts, kitchen designers and business owners, to reveal the subtle cues in a home that convey luxury and privilege.
From cutlery and pillows to the size of your TV, here’s our ultimate guide to ensuring your home makes the (top) cut…
Bars of soap
Real upper-class people are also often impeccably frugal (our beloved late queen is a good example of someone who hated waste). A good one-bar soap will last for countless washes, while fancy – i.e. regular – liquid bottles dry quite quickly. And the plastic is bad for the planet.
Multiple dogs (probably cocker spaniels)
A group of noisy, ankle-high dogs smell of country chic, a reflection of those happy, outdoorsy types who love nothing more than to stride out into the fields with a collection of barking companions around their boots.
‘Open the door of any posh home and there’s no doubt you’ll be greeted by a number of dogs, the majority of which will be some sort of working breed, often used on weekend hunts,’ says Ruth Beeton, co-founder from Home Sale Pack. “Though inevitably there will be a smaller, ‘popular’ breed running the show.”
It’s also worth noting that the house may smell like wet dog, while dog hair sticks to the couch. But that’s part of the chic package.
Sheets and blankets (no duvets)
When a chic person gets sick from work, he doesn’t have duvet days, but curls up under crisp Egyptian cotton sheets and elegantly woven blankets. It is true that duvets make it easier to make the bed, but the country house’s return to sheets and blankets is the hallmark of true breeding.
Silver photo frames
In posh homes there are many of these, often passed down or given to relatives for important birthdays and anniversaries. They literally frame an upper class heritage – whether it’s a class photo from a small public school or something involving horses.
Butter dishes
Good breeding is beautifully expressed in a lump of butter left stranded in its own dish. To be honest, it’s quite common to leave that smell of mass-produced packaging in plain sight. A commercially spreadable variety served in its packaging is an abomination to the posh household. Far better to unwrap a bar and place it in a butter dish. Ditto for a jar and spoon for mustard or other condiments (get that ketchup bottle ‘on the table’).
Boot rooms and worn vests
Ah, the chunky sleeveless padded vest. Is there any other piece of clothing – other than the family tiara – that truly conveys upper-class credentials? Especially if it hangs in a boot room – not in the hallway – next to boots that are so covered in mud that you can no longer distinguish their color (green).
‘The specific term boot room is a fancy giveaway. Think exposed brick walls, a worn rug perfect for wiping muddy paws, and maybe a Barbour jacket or two hanging casually on hooks,” says Sylvia James, interior design expert at HomeHow.co.uk.
Counterintuitively, outdoor clothing is no place for designer labels. The more battered and weathered the garment is, the more authentic its chic features.
Dirty Land Rover
Mud screams class, which is why a filthy 4×4 on the driveway is also a major signal. There’s a strange kind of relativism at play here. The classier you are, the less clean you need to be (as long as it’s mud). Porsches and Mercedes sports cars scream money – but not class. ‘You can expect to see a splash of Land Rovers from recent years, mostly Defenders, ranging from brand new to the classic shape in Ascot green,’ says Ruth Beeton.
Walk-in closets
A hallmark of the truly chic and as such usually a place where elegantly labelled homemade jams and jars of chutney are kept.
“Walk-in closets are a hallmark of luxury homes, subtly conveying a level of affluence and refinement,” says luxury kitchen designer Tom Howley. Unlike standard kitchen cabinets, he points out that “these very much reflect a homeowner’s attention to detail and dedication to a well-appointed lifestyle.”
Freshly cut flowers
Real posh homes reflect a love of the land. Not least a well-tended garden and the need to bring its fruits inside to brighten up the home – that’s why freshly cut flowers are likely to fall out of vases if the owner of the house is well-mannered. A wilted bunch of flowers from the gas station just won’t do. Posh people will never say it with these kinds of flowers.
Open hearth
The roar of a fireplace is the key to a well-bred home. It exudes (sorry) so many chic elements. The hard work of tilling the land and chopping logs, the return to cold stately homes and a natural focal point to gather around, drawing room-style, and play charades. A crackling log fire will even outshine fancy underfloor heating when it comes to showing off upper-class credentials.
The Aga
The same goes for an Aga: the older and rustier, the better. Authentic chic is about being timeless (although it’s often cold as you wait impatiently for the damn thing to heat up).
Family cutlery
Look, buying cutlery is so reasonable these days, with many big box stores selling utilitarian packs of knives and forks en masse. But it doesn’t compare to the legacy of family cutlery, which usually requires two hands to lift one fork, and is likely made of pewter, engraved and laden with history.
And by the way, buying food-specific cutlery is not a sign of good breeding. There haven’t been fish knives in royal palaces since Edward VII declared them ‘very common’.
…and don’t forget the soup terrine
A gleaming silver tureen, nestled among everyday tableware, could well be a family heirloom, discreetly nodding to generations of chic lunches and dinners.
Cushions made from family tweed
Softly toned decorative cushions from Next or a beautiful throw from John Lewis are rarely seen in upper-class homes. A chic family may well have its own seat, either in the form of a mansion or something to sit on. And if that includes tweed, why not turn it into a pillow?
Small radio in the kitchen
You won’t find Alexa in the kitchen (posh people bark at servants, not gadgets). Instead, there will be a small wireless radio tuned to posh shows like Gardeners’ Question Time and The Archers (even after that sexy, swampy shower scene – so much more palatable when delivered only through sound effects).
The same goes for a small TV in the living room. Flat screens the size of billboards are for chavs. Anyway, who needs 60-inch TVs: these people don’t watch Bridgerton. They’re Bridgerton.
Fabric napkins and napkin rings
You can bring out the beautiful napkins for special occasions. But those who are well-bred use cloth napkins even if it is only a modest kitchen supper.
Posh people don’t use ugly floral paper napkins – and folding them into a nice shape and stuffing them into a glass is absolutely out of the question. Instead, it should be cloth, with the napkin rolled up like a tube in a napkin ring.
Anything else shows horrible table settings (and manners). ‘Even the most informal meal is adorned with neatly folded linen napkins. Bonus points for monogrammed borders, a subtle display of family,” emphasizes interior design expert Sylvia James.