She was the queen with a huge inferiority complex.
Queen Mary was empress of all she could see, and was adored by millions of people around the world. She had to hide her insecurities – and there were quite a few – behind a stiff, formal demeanor and a beautifully exaggerated style of dress.
But inside she trembled. She was afraid of her husband, King George V, and ashamed of her mother, the Duchess of Teck.
She felt she wasn’t royal enough and was scared of her ‘sweet sister-in-law’.
Mary never showed any cheerfulness, for fear that people would hear her ‘vulgar’ laugh.
Although she was engaged to two future kings – George V’s elder brother Eddie, the Duke of Clarence, proposed first – she was forced to keep silent about the one man she truly loved.
She hated Balmoral and she detested her children, including the future Edward VIII and George VI.
In turn, she was hated by her granddaughter, Princess Margaret, who took pleasure in pointing out how unroyal Mary had been before she became queen.
She was the queen with a king-sized inferiority complex. Empress of all she oversaw, adored by millions the world over, Queen Mary was obliged to hide her insecurities – and there were many – behind a stiff, formal demeanor and a beautifully over-the-top style of dress, writes CHRISTOPHER WILSON. Above: Mary shortly before marrying King George V
George V’s older brother, Eddie, Duke of Clarence, proposed first, but he died at the age of 28. Above: Mary and Eddie together
Cold, selfish, dull and lonely, Queen Mary gave her life to her duty, never once showing the sense of disquiet that came from, as others saw it, her marriage to someone above her station.
She was born in London in 1867 and was of royal blood: her mother was a granddaughter of King George III.
But her father, Francis, Duke of Teck, was merely an Austrian-born nobleman, without great distinction and, worse still, without money.
The Duke lived off his wife’s royal allowance, but the couple were wasteful and at one point had to escape their creditors by hiding out in France for several years.
Upon their return, Mary’s mother, Princess Mary Adelaide, became famous for her obesity, rude behavior and constant lateness.
Their daughter – whom they named May – was shocked by her parents’ scandalous and often ill-tempered behavior and felt humiliated by their forced exile.
She was therefore surprised and eternally grateful that she had been chosen from a group of wannabe women to become the bride of the Duke of Clarence, a man of diverse tastes, including those in drink and other male tastes.
The choice was not appreciated by all members of the royal family, including her father-in-law, the future King Edward VII, who ‘took off like a shot’ when he heard of the engagement.
Lady Juliet Duff recalled that May was ‘fearful of and subject to’ Edward VII.
‘She was well aware that she was not royal enough by nature. When someone said that Emperor William of Germany would come to lunch, she once said: “Isn’t that nice of them?” Her lady-in-waiting made her angry about this.’
Princess Mary of Teck and the future King George V on their wedding day in 1891
The Duke and Duchess of Teck were terrible spendthrifts and at one point had to go into hiding in France to escape their creditors. Above: The couple with their daughter Mary
The Queen detested her children, including the future Edward VIII and George VI. Above: Mary with her husband and their son, the future King Edward VIII
King George V with his parrot Charlotte, who hopped over the bacon and eggs during breakfast while the King discussed state affairs with her and not with the Queen.
Mary’s biographer James Pope-Hennessy adds that other members of the royal family used to ridicule her for her dressing style.
But if it’s true that she adorned herself lavishly with diamonds and pearls, making her look like someone from a Gilbert and Sullivan operetta, then people liked her that way.
In a world where half the globe was still painted pink on maps, indicating the vast extent of the British Empire, Queen Mary, with her tall, corseted, coiffed, silk-clad figure, was an imposing presence, even if, as Lady Juliet said, she looked a bit like Liberace.
She moved slowly and gracefully, a distant figure that somehow added to the mystery of the monarchy, and her king was grateful for it.
But did he love her? It is said that George had his eye on another girl until his brother Eddie died at the age of 28 and he suddenly found himself a king-in-the-making.
As was the custom in royal circles, it was decided that May would be a more suitable bride than he had chosen himself. George dutifully went along with this plan.
“My husband wasn’t in love with me when we got married,” May confessed to her friend Margaret Wyndham, “but he fell in love with me later.”
Only to a certain extent. The person George liked best, in a non-romantic way, was his younger sister Princess Victoria, the spinster daughter of Edward VII and Queen Alexandra.
They spoke extensively on the phone every day, and at weekends Mary had to make the long drive to Iver in Buckinghamshire, where Victoria lived. She would sit and listen to the brother and sister talking endlessly as if they had not spoken for weeks.
Victoria was snobbish about Mary’s parentage.
According to the Duke of Windsor (the former King Edward VIII), Princess Victoria was “ab**** of the first order” when it came to her sister-in-law.
Mary’s daughter-in-law Elizabeth, the future Queen Elizabeth the Queen Mother, kept her distance and was consequently much hated by her
She hated Princess Margaret with an intense hatred, and the feeling was mutual.
“Margaret couldn’t stand her. She always said her grandmother was jealous of her because, as the daughter of a king, she was more regal than May, who had only married one,” wrote Margaret’s biographer Tim Heald.
It didn’t help that Mary made it clear that she thought Margaret was “spoiled” and far too short (she was barely over five feet tall). Margaret never forgave her for this.
It is clear that Mary was not used to close family relationships.
According to the Duke of Windsor, his mother and father had a strained marriage: ‘My father had a terrible temper. He was downright rude to my mother.
‘I’ve seen her leave the table many times because he was so rude to her, and we children would all follow her out – not when the staff was around, of course.’
And at breakfast, Mary had to play second fiddle to Charlotte, the King’s parrot, who waddled among the bacon, eggs and marmalade on the table while His Majesty discussed state affairs with her, and not with his Queen.
And according to equerry Lord Claud Hamilton, ‘The King and Queen were just terrible parents, the most terrible parents. They really didn’t care for the children at all.’
This only added to Mary’s unexplained unhappiness, because she saw queenship as a job. And that job was to serve and support the king. There was no time to worry about the minor issues of raising children.
“She prized the throne above all else,” said her friend Margaret Wyndham.
Queen Mary had a particular ‘hatred’ for Princess Margaret, and the feeling was mutual. Above: Mary with Margaret and King George on their way to Balmoral, 1930s
It was said that Queen Mary hated Balmoral. Above: Mary at a garden party at Balmoral in September 1927
In her pursuit of this sense of duty, she even put aside her love for a young officer of the guard: Arthur, 5th Viscount Hood.
“She had really been in love, the only time in her life,” wrote biographer James Pope Hennessy.
According to Margaret Wyndham, Mary had ‘then used up her power of love – for though she was as in love as she could be, he was one she could not marry’ – because Arthur was only a viscount, not a duke or prince.
But May of Teck served her king and country with devotion, despite her doubts and shortcomings.
She was queen consort from 1910 until her husband’s death in 1936. She then continued her duties as a symbol of the World War I generation until her death at the age of 85 in 1953.
Queen Mary was tall, austere and, to the end, disturbingly regal. She may have felt unworthy, but she fulfilled her task – and sacrificed much of her personal happiness in the process.