Massachusetts couple in four-way open relationship with second couple say their unusual romance is only way to get on property market, with foursome now set to buy home together, as throuple say their arrangement has slashed childcare costs
A Massachusetts couple who are in an open four-way relationship with another duo in Maine have revealed how polyamory has made their financial lives easier — while other groups say their unorthodox living arrangements have lowered childcare costs.
Polyamorous couples have felt the financial benefits of having more than one partner – as they can re-foreclose on their home, pay less rent, and also properly budget how much money they spend on their third, fourth and fifth partners.
Willie Burnley Jr., a polyamorous Somerville city councilman, told the Boston sphere: ‘The meme is that being polyamorous is the only way to pay the rent these days.’
Some couples have even reduced their childcare costs, as having more than two adults in a home means there is always someone to look after the children.
Polyamorous couple Scott Legault, 58, and Petra Jackl are happily married but also live in their home in Warwick, Rhode Island with Legault’s girlfriend
Willie Burnley Jr., a polyamorous Somerville city councilman, told the Boston Globe, “The meme is that the only way to pay rent these days is to be polyamorous.”
Polyamorous couple Scott Legault, 58, and Petra Jackl are happily married but also live in their home in Warwick, Rhode Island, with Legault’s girlfriend.
As a result, they refinanced their mortgage to include all three names on the document – which ultimately worked out better in terms of their personal finances.
The trio identifies as a “cattle,” with one person, in this case Scott, being a link between two other people who are not dating.
Sparrow Alden, 59, has been married to her wife of 33 years, and the couple has figured out how to deal with not wasting too much money on their extra partners’ dates.
Alden also dates other boyfriends out of state as part of her polyamorous marriage.
She and her wife put all their earnings into a shared bank account, and then Sparrow receives a monthly allowance of about $100, a special budget she can spend on her other dates.
Alden told the Globe, “It was just total transparency.”
Rhode Island resident Matthew Burdick shares a girlfriend with his wife, Melanie Carrazzo — and is in several other relationships on top of that.
Burdick said, “Love is infinite, but tTime and finances do not. You just have to decide what your priorities are.”
Carrazzo said of money in multi-person relationships, “It’s still a difficult conversation, but part of polyamory is having difficult conversations and actually having them.”
Kaden McPherson, 30, and her husband live in an apartment in Fall River, Massachusetts, where rent is expected to rise this year. Because their salaries are under pressure, they are in discussions about moving with another married couple in Rhode Island and buying a house.
The second couple of the foursome lives in Maine – and is described as their ‘other’ half. She said having more partners works “really, really well” financially.
McPherson explained: ‘My mother said, “I can barely handle your father sometimes, how do you cope with three people?” I said, “It’s going to be quite interesting, but from a financial point of view it’s going to work out really, really well.”
Heather Reid-Barratt, 38, from New Hampshire, is feuding with her husband and another partner – whom the duo share.
Kaden McPherson, 30, (left) and her husband live in an apartment in Fall River, Massachusetts, where rent is expected to rise this year. Because their salaries are under pressure, they are in discussions about moving with another married couple in Rhode Island and buying a house.
Marissa Barlow, 36, is one of McGirr’s new poly partners. She describes herself as “soly poly,” meaning she lives alone. Because she hasn’t divided her finances, she always pays for half of her dates
Reid-Barratt and her husband have an 11-year-old together. They have realized that now that the new partner has moved in with them, they do not have to worry as much about the costs of childcare.
She told the Globe, “That’s such a relief from having to pay for someone to come over.” She said the financial help from a trio was “a benefit I didn’t expect.”
Fritz McGirr was monogamously married to his partner until 2021. After their divorce, he wanted to try polyamory. Now “all topics” are on the table, including money, which was a controversial topic in his marriage because his wife was a higher earner than himself.
Marissa Barlow, 36, is one of McGirr’s new poly partners. She describes herself as “soly poly,” meaning she lives alone. Because she hasn’t divided her finances, she always pays for half of her dates.
She said it’s crucial to have an open conversation about money with her partners.
Meanwhile, a polyamorous woman who lives with her husband and her boyfriend has also shared a fascinating insight into the trio’s finances.
Jennifer Martin of Richmond, Virginia, told Business Insider how opening up her marriage finally helped her achieve financial freedom when she and her two partners bought a house together.
She and husband Daniel, who married in 2008 before welcoming two children, were struggling financially due to the cost of living, student loans, high inflation and wages.
But the mom told the outlet, “While other people my age dream about owning their own home, sacrificing children and a career they love, one trick up my sleeve has helped me more than anything: polyamory.”
Fritz McGirr (photo) was monogamously married to his partner until 2021. After their divorce, he wanted to try polyamory. Now ‘all topics’ are on the table, including money, which was a controversial topic in his marriage because his wife was a higher earner than himself
The couple decided to try dating other people for the first time in December 2013, choosing partners who were already in a “primary relationship.”
‘We didn’t think we would live with future partners. But when I met Ty in 2018, my perspective began to change. The five of us have become very close, like a family,” she explained.
Jennifer made the distinction that the group is not a group, in that Daniel and Ty are not dating each other – she instead dates the men separately in an arrangement she calls a “vee.”
Two years after meeting Ty, the group decided to take the plunge and rent a house all together, with finances being a key factor.
Jennifer previously earned $70,000, but decided to quit her full-time writing job to go freelance and find time to work on her own book about polyamory and Christianity.
This meant that her earnings were now more inconsistent, earning just $25,000 a year.
Daniel makes $55,000 as a private school teacher and Ty makes $75,000 as a process manager at a bank.
Jennifer and Daniel share a joint bank account, savings account and credit card and file their taxes jointly.
But the mother of two also shares a savings account and several credit cards with Ty “to show financial attachment in case we run into legal issues with polyamory.”
The trio split the $1,537 per month rent between them: Jennifer and Daniel paid $837 and Ty paid $700.
The couple pays for the trio’s cell phone bill and groceries, with Ty covering the costs of utilities and WiFi.
Jennifer Martin and husband Daniel (left), who married in 2008 before welcoming two children together, were having financial problems before meeting Ty (right)
Healthcare costs and supplies for Jennifer’s children are covered by the group, but items like cars and clothing are paid for individually.
Jennifer claimed that the trio have yet to have a “substantial disagreement” over money, but the process of buying a house as a group has proven to be a bit complicated.
‘It hasn’t been finalized yet, but Ty and Daniel are working on the mortgage application.
‘I don’t do that because my income as an independent freelancer is too recent for the mortgage provider; this requires two years of self-employment.
“But lending Daniel and Ty together is another way to ensure we are legally and financially connected.”
Jennifer has said that if she and Daniel die, the couple will want Ty to continue raising their children.
If Ty were to die, he would also want his assets to go to Jennifer and children.
She concluded, “Polyamory has been a life-saver for me financially, especially as someone who married and had children at a young age.
“Until a third person contributed to my family’s budget, I never dreamed of owning a home. With three incomes it is easier to make ends meet.
“Sharing your resources with loved ones, whether romantically or not, may seem scary, but it’s a great way to support each other.”