Breaking news for the Duke and Duchess of Sussex that neither they nor their children Archie and Lilibet have reportedly been invited by King Charles to commemorations marking the first anniversary of Queen Elizabeth’s death.
Since Harry and Meghan’s only currency is that they are members of the royal family, the stupidity must feel particularly bitter. It also suggests that the king has finally found his courage.
We were all desperate that the royals didn’t fight back after the extraordinary accusations Harry and Meghan hurled at them while the late Queen was still alive.
Now it’s payback time. And for that we should all shout, “Three cheers for the king!”
The message is clear: they are not welcome here. Quite right too – the rejection means the couple won’t be able to take advantage of the most harrowing royal ceremonies since the Queen’s death next month, for their selfish documentaries.
Scenes from the fifth episode of the Netflix documentary Harry and Meghan
To make matters worse, even the disgraced Prince Andrew and his ex-wife Sarah have been invited to the family gathering in Balmoral on September 8.
And Harry and Meghan can’t claim their absences are due to conflicting calendar appointments, as they launch the Invictus Games the next day just a stone’s throw from Britain in Dusseldorf, Germany. They have already left Frogmore Cottage in Windsor, meaning they have no home in Britain.
Now they are publicly shunned by the royal family. They must realize that they could face a bleak future. Perhaps this explains why we’ve seen a very different Harry and Meghan in recent public appearances together.
They used to hold hands and stare into each other’s eyes.
But in their vain video this week, in which they thank the winners of a youth tech prize they’ve funded, they never made eye contact or touched.
And in photos celebrating Meghan’s 42nd birthday in Montecito on Wednesday, she walks straight out of the restaurant in front of a miserable-looking Harry.
No holding hands, no back stroking. Is the royal show over for the Sussexes?
Millions of us fervently hope so.
Amanda’s Spicy Revenge
Lots of outrage when Amanda Holden was shamed on Twitter by misogynist influencer Andrew Tate after she posted a photo of herself in a bikini.
Tate said, “You’re a wife and a mother and you’re past your teens.” Amanda, 52, then shared this even racier photo – while still awaiting trial on human trafficking charges (despite being released from house arrest yesterday).
Revenge is sometimes a dish best served hot.
Much outrage when Amanda Holden was shamed on Twitter by misogynist influencer Andrew Tate
When TikTok star chef Thomas Straker proudly posted a photo of the mostly young staff at his successful London restaurant Straker’s, he was hit with a wave of swear words online for being all-white, all-male and lacking in diversity.
Crikey, when did young hard-working white dudes with jobs become a target for ridicule?
Ken is the greatest
Readers may think I’m writing my column listening to Rachmaninoff and other high-profile tunes from the BBC. Sorry to break the news, but I’m a Ken Bruce fan and – along with a million others – have abandoned the Beeb and followed him to Greatest Hits Radio.
Yesterday Craig Crouch was sentenced to life in prison for the murder of his 10-month-old stepson Jacob.
The baby’s mother, Gemma Barton, was found not guilty of her son’s murder, but was given 10 years for causing or allowing his death.
Half of the sentence will be served on probation, so she will only be in prison for five years. I can’t help wondering why the mother, whose duty it is to protect their child, so often gets away with a lower fee in cases like this?
Yesterday Craig Crouch was sentenced to life in prison for the murder of his 10-month-old stepson Jacob
Singer Lizzo returns to a lawsuit from three of her ex-dancers, with allegations of sexual harassment, bullying and fat shaming. She denies the claims, saying they are “heartbreaking” – an exquisite expression given her famous plus-sized girth.
Broad appeal
English cricketer Stuart Broad is in talks to take part in Strictly Come Dancing. Famous for his white headband and intoxicating masculinity, the 6ft 6in ace scored a six with his last shot and took a wicket with his last ball, in his final test before retiring.
I can’t wait to see Broad in sequined tights and a button-down shirt open to his navel. Pass on the smelling salts!
Bin Barbie. . . not the boyfriend
A new TikTok craze is encouraging young women to dump their boyfriends if the men don’t embrace the core messages of female empowerment and the evils of patriarchy after watching the Barbie movie.
Only a Barbie brain could be this crazy. As for the dumped boyfriends, I’d say it’s a lucky escape.
A new TikTok craze encourages young women to dump their boyfriends if the men don’t embrace the core messages of female empowerment and the evils of patriarchy after watching the Barbie movie
Meanwhile, the website Bairbie.me – which transforms real people into their Barbie or Ken image – produces this Ken version of no, not Brad Pitt, Ryan Gosling or Jude Law, but Boris Johnson.
Who said Barbie didn’t have a sense of humor?
Strictly judge Shirley Ballas posts photos from her sun holiday in Portugal, where she enjoys “four juices a day, intestinal irrigations, yoga, long walks, spin classes and gym workouts.”
As her fellow judge Craig Revel Horwood might say, that sounds “absolutely disastrous honey” – and the kind of vacation that would get zero points from me.
Freddie Mercury’s lifelong friend Mary Austin has auctioned off his prized possessions, including a cat waistcoat with his favorite felines on it.
Freddie wore it in his last video with Queen.
I had to tell my moggie Ted – who thinks it’s the cat’s whiskers – that, at £30,000, another bites the dust when it comes to his wishes.
Westminster wars
Physician assistants are ‘very angry’ that Rishi Sunak blames their strikes for the increase in waiting lists, which now reach 7.47 million.
Yet it’s hard to deny the facts as NHS England’s own figures show that more than 600,000 hospital appointments have already been affected by their strikes.
It is certainly time we reviewed the justice system, given that lawyers for the man who killed Tory MP Sir David Amess in front of witnesses in his constituency were awarded £100,000 in legal aid – although the self-declared jihadist admitted he had stabbed this sweet man to death.
How could it have taken police two hours to even realize that Greenpeace protesters had raided the Prime Minister’s home in Yorkshire and another five hours to arrest intruders? Does it have no security? Were lazy cops caught napping?
Had it been the US, they would have been arrested on the spot – or possibly shot.
Trainee doctors are ‘very angry’ that Rishi Sunak blamed their strikes for rising waiting lists, now 7.47 million
Melania Trump is nowhere to be seen when The Donald returns to court, nor has she seen a campaign with him.
Meanwhile, his very loyal legal spokeswoman Alina Habba stubbornly defends him outside the courtroom.
Melania must surely be happy to see her man in such safe hands – as any devoted woman would be.