PLATELL’S PEOPLE: Don’t go to the King’s Coronation, Harry, and simply wish your dad well 

Despite the horrific accusations of harassment and racism that Harry and Meghan have leveled at the Royal Family, the King has maintained a dignified silence throughout.

Like her mother, Queen Elizabeth, she never complained, never explained. But behind closed doors, Charles must have been deeply hurt, just as any loving father would be after such public attacks.

Perhaps even more inexcusable for Charles was the fact that Harry attacked his wife Camilla, as well as William and Kate.

Yet from the Oprah interview to the docu-series to Spare’s memoir, Charles the father never took back the olive branch.

Insiders say the King has always insisted that although Harry and Megan are no longer royals, they are family and therefore welcome at any family event, including the Coronation.

But, as the Mail reveals today, we now know that Harry wants a private apology from his father and brother before he even considers attending. It is an outrageous demand. But a completely predictable one.

Excuse me, why? Is Harry really so emotionally stunted that he feels that, having poured out all his vitriol on his family, he is the victim? Do you lack an ounce of humility? The King’s heart has never hardened against Harry and he is prepared to talk to him: “he is his son, he loves him,” a source explains. But William doesn’t think about it and tells himself that he has no regrets, as he should be.

Well done Wills. Good for standing up to your bullying brother, because that’s what Harry is, a vengeful, self-obsessed bully absurdly wrapped in his sheep’s clothing to save the world.

Even in America, they’re sick of the Sussexes. A new Newsweek poll shows Harry’s approval rating has fallen 48 percent since December, and Meghan’s 40 percent. Her net approval rating is now -10, hers is -17. By comparison, Prince Andrew is -2.

Licking their wounds in their California mansion, these deluded narcissists seem hell-bent on making things worse. Demanding an apology will only make them more unpopular.

Of course, they could do themselves, and us, a great favor by recusing themselves from the Coronation and simply wishing Charles and Camilla all the best. But she is too vain and he is too stupid.

That’s a bad bet, Tindall.

It was bad enough that Zara and Mike Tindall’s bleak new kitchen resembled a washed up slaughterhouse, but they were also being interviewed for William Hill’s YouTube channel. Male role models like Tindall shouldn’t be promoting an online gambling operation that draws millions of people, often into a life of addiction and misery.

• It’s ridiculous that the King is privately paying for his brother Andrew’s protection when the only one who might want to hurt him is his ex Fergie, who still lives with him in the £30m mansion he fears he’ll be kicked out of. . . She must be furious, the days of taking advantage of her may be numbered.

Jezza frustrates the wokies

After Jeremy Clarkson weighed in on the muck with totally unacceptable comments about Meghan, streaming giants Netflix and Amazon Prime, and even ITV, threatened to cancel it. The brigade woke up triumphant. Now, his farm show has broken all records as the most-watched original show on Amazon Prime, surpassing Tolkien’s spin-off The Rings of Power. The real power lies with the viewers, and Clarkson is reaping them by the millions.

Not loading the dishwasher properly and not turning off the lights are among the top ten domestic disputes that drive couples crazy. Try to be single, when you want to fight with someone about glasses being placed incorrectly in the dishwasher so that water splashes on you when you flush it.

• The latest word on ISIS girlfriend Shamima Begum being denied entry into the UK after she boasted that the Manchester Arena bombing was ‘fair’ comes from Jade Clough, who was injured in the explosion: “Those innocent pop fans never came home.” . . So why should you?

Schoolgirls in Merseyside cried after their teachers checked the length of their skirts. Heck, at my old school they made us kneel on a concrete floor to check ours, one teacher to measure the length and another to make sure we wore regulation green bloomers. Just remembering it gives me PTSD!

Lily-Pose! What a sad photo of Depp’s girl

Johnny Depp’s daughter, Lily-Rose, poses for iD magazine in a replica of her father’s ex-girlfriend Kate Moss’ infamous ‘naked dress’, and even imitates the image of the ’90s supermodel languidly puffing on a cigarette .

A little creepy and a little sad. The image of the superstar Kate circulated all over the world in all the newspapers and magazines. Lily-Rose is clearly desperate to expose herself.

westminster wars

Bob Geldof, 71, is hit with a storm of snowflakes after repeatedly confusing Sam Smith by not calling the non-binary singer they/them on ITV’s This Morning. Given that Geldof worked with Smith in 2014 when they were still identifying as a dude, maybe people should give Bob a break.

• When the never-before-seen photos from 1982 of Princess Diana holding newborn William go up for auction, I hope the Prince of Wales will buy two of them: one of his mother gazing adoringly at him, and also one of a beaming Charles with his first child in the lap. . A reminder that his parents were once truly, madly, deeply in love and happy.

Welby in the wrong…again

Archbishop of Canterbury Justin Welby says that in the event of a Ukrainian victory, Russia must not be ‘crushed’, punished or forced to pay reparations for destroying half of that country and killing thousands of its civilians and soldiers.

Is there any topic where deaf Welby doesn’t fall on the wrong side of the argument?

To the dismay of loyal Radio 2 listeners, maudlin Vernon Kay—the younger half of Strictly’s Tess Daly—will replace the brilliant Ken Bruce. Overwrought BBC executives say he has “a wealth of new ideas and content”.

Would that content include tips on how to sext women other than your wife?

Friends say Brad Pitt, 59, is so in love with his girlfriend Inés de Ramón, 29, that on Valentine’s Day he sent her a beautiful bouquet of flowers and a baguette. How strange: a hint that willowy Ines should eat more?

Pass the smelling salts if this is a reference to something more, er, intimate!