DR GINNI MANSBERG: Sudden bouts of rage at work? Snapping at your husband? This is why women get angry in their forties – and what you can do about it
You are angry, irritable and feel like you are going crazy – and that never used to be the case. If this sounds familiar, you may be suffering from ‘peri-rage’.
Perimenopausal anger refers to outbursts of anger related to the hormonal changes a woman experiences during the transition to menopause.
During ‘the change’, estrogen naturally decreases, which affects the production of the mood-regulating, happiness-promoting chemical serotonin.
As a result, it is normal to feel out of balance, and this may continue until your body adjusts to the lower estrogen levels.
Like hot flashes, migraines, insomnia and low libido, anger is caused by hormones and amplified by hormonal spikes – and the key to surviving this, according to Dr Ginni Mansberg, is to equip yourself with knowledge.
‘The most important thing is that you receive training. Women don’t realize that their anger is caused by hormonal spikes and not stress at work,” says Dr. Mansberg, author of The M Word: How to Thrive in Menopause and co-founder of the Perimenopause Education Hub Don’t sweat it.
The moment you realize that the mood swings that sabotage your relationship and make you irritable at work are actually caused by hormones—and are treatable—is the moment you take back control of your life.
It is also an important realization for the husband of a perimenopausal woman. They will no longer take those tough moments so personally.
You are angry, irritable and feel like you are going crazy – and that never used to be the case. If this sounds familiar, you may be suffering from ‘peri-fad’, says Dr Ginni Mansberg (right), co-founder, with Shelly Horton (left), of menopause education hub Don’t Sweat It
“We don’t want women in their 30s and 40s to change careers because of their anger,” adds Dr. Mansberg.
“And we don’t want relationships to break down because you fly into a rage again.”
Sometimes anger during perimenopause is misdiagnosed as depression and anxiety and a woman is unnecessarily diagnosed with antidepressants.
Dr. Mansberg says women who experience mental health problems during perimenopause – usually in their 40s – are often led astray by doctors, even though special menopause treatments are “76 percent more likely to work” for them.
These treatments include hormone replacement therapy (HRT), testosterone, estrogen-based creams and supplements.
‘People are shocked when it works. They come in a week or a month later crying because they finally feel like themselves,” she tells me.
Dr. Mansberg’s friend and colleague Shelly Horton suffered from massive mood swings and depression when she first started perimenopause.
The usually cheerful redhead told Dr. Mansberg about her feelings and got the help she needed to ‘get back to normal’.
Together the two women founded Don’t Sweat It, an educational center that advises workplaces on how to help their female staff make life changes..
The moment you realize that the mood swings that sabotage your relationship and make you irritable at work are actually caused by hormones – and are treatable – is the moment you take back control of your life (stock image)
Many perimenopausal women already feel uncomfortable in the workplace due to their other symptoms, making peri-rage all the more uncomfortable.
Dr. Mansberg says it’s not unusual for women to give up their careers because they’re tired of the struggle.
Perimenopause can last from twelve weeks to ten years, with most women experiencing symptoms for about four years. It usually happens after a woman turns 40, but can occur as early as her mid-30s.
One in five women comes away without any negative complaints; another one in five suffer from serious symptoms that affect their daily lives; and three in five experience mild to moderate symptoms.