Why you should aim LOW for your New Year’s resolution for the sake of your sanity – and the key mistakes to avoid

Many of us are guilty of setting unrealistic New Year’s resolutions and abandoning them after just a few months.

While goals are an important part of setting your intentions for the coming year, life coach and advisor Linda Magson is convinced that we are going about it all wrong.

“We get a sense of failure when we set goals that are too ambitious and too high, and convince ourselves that other people will think we are a failure,” Ms Magson told Daily Mail Australia.

‘Then we end up thinking, “I just shouldn’t have tried it” and go back to our baseline.

“More often than not, it’s not the person who didn’t get their fix. It’s their plan to get there, or the goal itself.”

It’s also important to think about the reason behind your goal, Ms. Magson said.

The most popular New Year’s resolution has long been to lose weight, but will losing X number of pounds really change your life? Mrs. Magson doesn’t think so.

“Often there can be a kind of pressure that makes you think, ‘Wouldn’t it be nice to be healthier?’ or ‘I want to fit into the clothes that fit me ten years ago,'” she said.

“They come to mind because health-related goals are the most popular, but they’re not specific enough.

‘Why is it so important for you to lose weight, what is its value? How does this affect your life, health and relationships?

‘Usually it comes down to wanting to feel more confident. That’s the most important thing.’

So instead of focusing your New Year’s resolutions on insecurities or “negative” aspects of your life, Ms Magson urged people to pay more attention to adding positive things to their routine.

Here are some goals she believes can help improve everyone’s lives and how to achieve them.

Make a joy list

One thing Ms Magson strongly urged people to try is making a ‘joy list’.

A joy list is a catalog of all the activities that make you happy. It can be anything from practicing a certain sport to enjoying a specific meal.

“Anything that brings you joy, gives you energy, or is fun can be added to your joy list, and you can keep building throughout the year,” Ms. Magson said.

“Then you can start making time—whether daily or a few times a week, depending on your schedule—for moments of joy.”

Making time for yourself regularly as part of your routine will help you feel happier and refreshed.

“It can make a small contribution to making a difference, but it can also make a significant difference,” Ms Magson said.

“By doing something on your joy list, you will have more joy in life at the end of each month. It can make everything else feel lighter.”

Gratitude

Gratitude has become a buzzword for self-improvement, but Ms Magson is convinced the attention is warranted.

‘Happiness can feel fleeting. “When you have a new job, a new device or a new relationship, it can make you happy for a while, but then it fades away and you’re looking for the next thing,” she said.

“Whereas if you practice gratitude every day, that feeling lasts longer because you’re reminding yourself of those positive achievements.

“It can be very powerful to mentally run through a list of the things you are grateful for when you wake up in the morning. Those first five minutes of the day are so important.

“By doing this simple thing we can boost our mood and sense of identity and feel more on top of things.”

Clean up

We’ve all heard it before: “Messy space, messy mind.”

Yet many of us still overlook the effects our environment can have on our well-being.

“Decluttering doesn’t generally make it onto the New Year’s list, but the idea that life is too complex and stressful is something everyone experiences,” Ms Magson said.

“Many people just want a simpler space, but it can be too overwhelming to get started.

‘I recommend picking one space at a time (it could be your workspace, entryway or bedroom) and focusing on decluttering it.

“Ask yourself, ‘What would really make this beneficial for me? What would it feel like home?’ and work towards that.’

It’s also important to make sure your environment doesn’t become too simple or doesn’t fit your routine.

‘You may need free surfaces to feel relaxed. Other people may need more personal items around them,” Ms Magson said.

‘Some need visual reminders that the world is a beautiful place, others are too easily distracted.

‘Put yourself first and find what is comfortable for you.’

Try something new

“Try something new” sounds like a goal that Ms. Magson would disapprove of because of its vagueness, but she wants people to think of it in the simplest terms.

Every week, or every month, we should try something new. Whether it’s something as big as starting a hobby, or something as small as driving a different way home.

“While it’s good to have a routine, it’s essential to break that routine at least once a week, if you can,” Ms Magson said.

‘It helps give you different perspectives and keeps you open and flexible when faced with new ideas and changes.

“You might learn something new, or feel refreshed and energized.”

How to set achievable goals

So you have your goals, now how do you achieve them?

Ms Magson believes the first step is to frame your resolutions as something exciting, rather than a chore.

“It’s not about ‘I can’t do this anymore,’ it’s about finding a positive replacement,” she said.

‘Suppose you want to improve your eating habits. Instead of thinking, “I can’t eat unhealthy food anymore,” think of some healthier meals that you enjoy and look forward to eating.

‘It takes a lot of energy to break bad habits and it can make you feel bad if you do them at all.

“Instead, reframe your goal as a change or replacement—something you feel good about.”

Despite offering advice on New Year’s resolutions, Ms Magson doesn’t believe the New Year is always the best time to put new habits into practice.

“It’s not the right time for a lot of people because it’s already such a busy period,” she said.

“However, there is a great sense of structure, and sometimes pressure, to having a New Year’s resolution.”

‘Think about the things you want to change and make plans for them. Then, at the right time, you can start introducing your plan.’

She also urged people to use planning frameworks, such as SMART or POWER, to properly prepare for their modified routine.

“I like to use the analogy of buying a car,” Ms. Magson said.

‘You wouldn’t just buy a car without trying it out first, you would research it and test drive it.

“Goals and resolutions are similar, we need to plan and test them before we commit.”