My son will squander grandpa’s inheritance. Can I pay his university fees with that instead?

I am currently working on my deceased father’s estate. He left 90 percent to me and the rest to my two sons.

One of them is estranged from us. We saw him at the funeral, but he was extremely drunk and upset. He is taking a year off from medical school due to financial problems and is working on saving for the next year.

I worry that he is drinking heavily (one of the reasons we asked him to leave the family home) and that he will waste the money he has left.

Can I pay it directly from his university fees or accommodation? PW, via email

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Harvey Dorset from This is Money replies: I’m sorry to hear about your father, and also about the problems with your son.

Regardless of your current relationship, it’s good to hear that you want to make sure the money left to him is well spent and that he benefits from it, whether he sees it in the short term or not.

This is especially true given the current problems you believe he is experiencing with alcohol, and your concerns that he will squander the money your father passed on to him.

Unfortunately, as discussed below, you are largely tied to what your son inherits and what he decides to do with the money.

In some ways, your problem is not a financial one, but an emotional one. To ensure that your son benefits from the money left to him, it may be important to address your relationship with him.

For him to see that it might be best for the money to go toward his student loans, he needs to understand that you want what’s best for him.

We spoke to two financial advisors to find out what you can do to ensure your son spends your father’s inheritance wisely, and what you should consider when drawing up your own will.

Jonathan Halberda, specialist financial advisor at Wesleyan Financial Services, answers: First of all, my condolences on the loss of your father and I’m sorry to hear about your situation.

Dealing with an inheritance can be an unsettling experience, especially when complicated family relationships are involved.

In this case, you may have some legal options to manage the inheritance for your son, if you are concerned about his well-being and how he might use the money.

Here are four key points to consider:

1. Your role as executor

If you are the executor of your deceased father’s estate, you are legally obligated to distribute the assets according to his wishes, as set out in his will.

This usually means that you must follow the instructions given and give your son his share directly, unless a different arrangement is included in the will.

2. Consider a deed of amendment

However, you may want to consider a deed of variation. This allows beneficiaries to change the way their estate is administered or distributed.

It is simply a legal document that allows you to change your father’s will, but it is important to emphasize that this cannot be done unilaterally – you must also have your son’s consent.

If your son agrees, you can work together on a deed of amendment that redirects his inheritance toward his college tuition or housing.

3. Trust arrangement

If the will allows this, or a deed of variation has been signed, it may be possible to set up a trust to manage your son’s estate.

This could specify that the funds placed in escrow are to be used solely for his educational expenses, living expenses, or other specific needs.

This trust can limit his access to the funds and be structured to protect against potential misuse.

4. Legal advice

In situations like these, it is highly recommended that you consult a lawyer experienced in wills and trusts as they can help you set up legally sound arrangements to achieve your objectives.

In addition, if you are concerned about potential disputes, legal advice can help you protect the interests of the estate and ensure that UK inheritance laws are complied with.

It is worth noting that, without specific permissions in the will or an agreement such as a deed of variation, any alternative use of your son’s share of the estate may involve a risk of breach of your duties as executor.

This only opens up opportunities for further challenging situations.

Paul Crossan, senior financial planner at Hargreaves Lansdown, replies: A will is essential for planning your later life because it provides certainty and ensures that those you want to benefit from your estate do so at the right time.

Since your estranged son is over 18 years old, there is no other option than for him to inherit his share, which was your father’s intention.

Sometimes wills can be changed after death by using a deed of variation. All beneficiaries must agree to the change and in this case it is unlikely that your son will agree to be removed from the will.

You have the option to pay your son’s tuition fees and/or accommodation costs directly from your own money.

You should also think about your other son and whether you want to give him or her a gift of equal value. If they don’t need the money, they can pay off their mortgage, save or invest for their own future.

It also opens up a longer-term question; If your son’s behavior continues and he continues to be reckless with money and lifestyle, you may feel uneasy about him ultimately inheriting from your own estate.

Real world scenarios such as addiction or these types of emotional issues are not uncommon and this is where a trusting relationship could be an option.

A trust holds inheritance or gift money for the benefit of your son, but is managed by trustees appointed by you.

You can also advise the trustees on when and how to make payments to your son.

For example, only pay income, or only distribute capital in specific circumstances such as purchasing a home.

There are numerous factors to consider as to whether or not a trust is suitable. A financial advisor or attorney can discuss these options. Trusts can be established during your lifetime, or upon your death through your will.

There may also be estate tax benefits for the person setting up the trust (the settlor), which is a common reason for people considering such trusts.

Putting money into a trust can mean that your estate will save inheritance tax on the full amount if you live another seven years.

Any investment growth above the initial amount can also be immediately protected from inheritance taxes that would have to be paid from the parents’ estate.

This is a complex area and there is no one size fits all when it comes to inheritance tax planning. Therefore, a detailed assessment and understanding of individual situations by a suitably qualified and experienced financial advisor or lawyer would first be required to discuss all options. .