A woman has told the moment her ‘perfect’ life came crashing down when she realized her husband of 13 years was secretly sleeping with one of her friends.
Charlotte*, 33, first met her husband, Rob*, when she was just 18 years old and the couple married two years later.
She claimed Rob was the “best” and supported her financially as she pursued her passions – without complaining about their lack of money or the extra hours he had to put in to fund their lifestyle.
But everything changed when Charlotte innocently grabbed Rob’s phone to look at photos from their niece’s birthday party.
Charlotte immediately felt something was wrong when she realized the phone was on airplane mode and felt her heart skip a beat.
“A few minutes later two suspicious messages came through – it was the name of a man I didn’t know, but the number belonged to one of my friends,” Charlotte revealed.
A woman shared the moment her ‘perfect’ life came crashing down as soon as she realized her husband of 13 years was secretly sleeping with one of her friends
The woman first provided some context for their relationship before the infidelity.
‘I always dreamed of being a dancer, but my parents couldn’t afford it – but Rob told me he was going to help me. HI paid for my dance lessons when we were in our twenties and we had to wrestle for a while.
‘He got an extra job and we moved to a smaller apartment. He helped me make my dream come true. I was grateful and always will be.”
The situation of the couple at this time was very different: they have their own house and planned to have children soon – therefore, the betrayal hit her like a truck.
“We have each other’s passwords, so I grabbed his phone to look at the pictures from my niece’s birthday.”
That’s when Charlotte took the phone out of airplane mode and saw the text messages pouring in.
She revealed the first message: “Honey, are you home yet?” followed by ‘Write to me when you can.’
She checked the contact number and realized it was from her friend Carol*.
‘I confronted him that same evening and he started asking for forgiveness and crying. He admitted that it had been going on for five months.
‘It started right after Carol got divorced, but her husband left her only because she was having an affair with another husband in our friendship group.
‘Rob and Carol work together and have become increasingly close after the divorce. He said he would cut off all communication with her and find a new job if I was willing to give him a second chance.”
Charlotte said she was torn and didn’t know how to move forward.
‘I have lost trust in him and part of me wants a divorce, but another part really loves him and I am so grateful to him for supporting me years ago.’
She revealed that after the confrontation, Rob was a perfect gentleman and started coming home early with flowers and chocolates in tow.
‘Should I forgive him and move on in the marriage? Can that trust be restored? I have seen many marriages heal after infidelity, and that this is possible with marriage counseling, but I am not sure.”
Charlotte said she was torn by the situation and didn’t know how to move forward
Many urged her to leave her husband after his horrific betrayal.
‘He cheated with a known cheater, he knew her track record. Nothing will come back from that. Don’t fall for the love bombing and guilt trips,” one person said.
Another added: ‘He’s now giving you chocolates and flowers to win you back, you can have them yourself. Don’t forget the months he spent treating this mistress special, when he could have spent his time, energy and effort on you.’
But some saw the other side of the story.
‘Everyone deserves a second chance if they sincerely apologize and show understanding for the extent of the harm done to their spouse. It’s entirely up to you if you can move past this and forgive him,” one woman said.
‘Infidelity is one of the worst things, but it’s not impossible to move past it. And if they’re really happy together and he’s supportive and kind, I don’t see the problem,” a second added.
*Names have been changed for privacy reasons.