A woman who ‘never blamed’ her father after he accidentally killed her mother by running over her with a tractor has opened up about her pain after he took her own life.
In 2019, Theo Boyd, 51, of Dallas, Texas, received a call to say there had been an accident on her parents’ farm and was told to hurry to be with her father, Joe, 78 years old.
When she arrived, she was told that her father had accidentally hit her mother, Sue, 74, with an old farm tractor – crushing her to death instantly – just six months before their 50th wedding anniversary.
Theo said she also lost ‘her father that day’ but never blamed him for losing her mother.
For the next three years, she visited and phoned him every day before turning up on Father’s Day in 2022 to discover he had killed himself.
Theo Boyd, 51, of Dallas, Texas, ‘never blamed’ her father Joe, 78, (right) after he accidentally killed her mother by running her over with a tractor.
Theo began to resent both her parents, but now feels ‘honoured’ and ‘grateful’ to have been the one to find her father ‘at peace’.
Theo, an author and former English teacher, said: “They explained that my father had accidentally run him over with a farm tractor.
“His foot was in the clutch. He reached and his left leg slipped.
He thought it was in neutral, but many of the older tractors go into gear.
“Mom was right in front of the tractor tire. It just ran through it. Everything was crushed.
“I never blamed him – I knew how much he missed my mum. I saw him in peace.
“I feel honored to have been the first to see pain-free.”
Theo received the call on June 29, 2019 and was told to come to the farm to be with her father.
She believed something had happened to her father and jumped into the car and texted her mother on the way.
Joe had accidentally run his wife Sue, 74, (right) into an old farm tractor – crushing her to death instantly
Theo pictured with her father Joe when she was a little girl on their farm in Texas
The horrific accident happened just six months before their 50th wedding anniversary (pictured on their wedding day)
She said: “I noticed my mum wasn’t texting me back. My mum was deaf – we text all the time so it was weird.’
Theo was told about the accident when she arrived and broke down.
Her parents had been checking the battery on the tractor when the incident happened.
Theo said: ‘My dad was just screaming and upset. They were soul mates.
It just totally killed my dad. I felt like I lost my dad that day too.’
At the morgue, the funeral director showed Theo where the tractor had run over her mother and they spent 13 hours working on it.
She said: ‘It went through his face, neck and shoulder. Everything was crushed.
“They spent 13 hours working on her – she was beautiful. So elegant.’
Theo and her sister saw their mother at peace, but decided to keep a closed casket for the funeral.
Theo spent the next three years seeing her father every day and saw his mobility decline.
Theo said the day before Joe took his life, her father had ‘put on weight’ and ‘put on weight’ (pictured as a baby with her father)
Theo when she was younger on her parents’ farm in Dallas, Texas
Theo said writing helped her grieve her parents and now she has written a book called My Grief Is Not Like Yours – which she hopes will help others dealing with the loss of loved ones ( photo: Joe and Sue’s grave)
She said: “He just couldn’t see his grief. He cursed a lot. It was a miserable life for him.’
The day before Joe took his life, Theo said he was ‘heavy’ and ‘put on’.
She said: “I never dreamed he would do this. I went to find him that morning.
“I woke up and thought, ‘I have to go see dad and surprise him.’
“He looked like he had fallen. Then I noticed all the blood.
“I kept going in and out to call for help. I was in shock. I’m so grateful to be the one who found him.’
Theo immediately went into funeral planning mode, but found she couldn’t stop crying.
She said: “I didn’t grieve my mother – I couldn’t cry in front of my father. I cried and cried when my father died.”
Theo said writing helped her grieve her parents and now she has written a book called ‘My Grief Is Not Like Yours’ – which she hopes will help others dealing with the loss of loved ones.
She said: ‘Lord the sorrow. It’s okay to feel sad.
“It’s so important for them to have someone who’s trained in grief counseling to talk to about it.”
Theo remembers her parents by thinking about her childhood memories on the farm – such as learning to drive a tractor and eating her mother’s cooked food.
She said: “I had a wonderful mum and dad. I hope this book will be a friend to people.’
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