A mother has been fiercely defended after revealing her daughter-in-law refused to accommodate her nut allergy.
The anonymous woman took to Reddit to share her frustrations with her son’s wife, whom she says her child has been married to for three years.
She explained that she had always cooked special meals for her son’s husband because she was a vegetarian. But when her son and his wife decided to host a dinner party, they refused to make her meal nut-free and requested that she bring her own food.
The mother wondered if she was wrong in the thread titled: ‘Am I the hole?,” because she refused to attend the dinner if her daughter-in-law wouldn’t make adjustments.
A mother has been fiercely defended after revealing her daughter-in-law refused to accommodate her nut allergy (stock image)
She explained: ‘I’m very frustrated. My son has been married to my DIL for three years now. I have always made extra dishes without meat to accommodate her.
“No matter how hard it was to do, I always made sure she had something to eat when I was hosting or when she was over. She is a vegetarian and at one point tried to go vegan.”
The mother noted that her son never got to eat them because his apartment was small.
However, when he bought a house for his wife, he invited his father and mother.
“My son and her never housed because they lived in a small apartment, but that changed since they just bought a house.
“They’re having a dinner this week and I called her to remind her that I’m allergic to nuts,” she said.
The Reddit user revealed that her daughter-in-law refused to make adjustments and told her to bring her own food.
‘She then told me she didn’t have time and that she had to bring my own food. She told me that she cooks a lot with different nuts and that she cannot change her menu,” the mother said.
The anonymous woman took to Reddit to share her frustrations with her son’s wife, whom she says her child has been married to for three years
The mother noticed that this made her angry and she started acting like a ‘villain’.
‘I told her I’m not going, and neither is my husband. That I’ve sheltered her for years and not once let her bring her own food. This led to an argument where she thinks I am being unreasonable,” she added.
And while her husband is by her side, her son and his wife have yet to see her perspective.
At the end of the post she said: ‘My husband is on my side, but my son and she are very upset.”
People flooded the comments section and slammed the daughter-in-law while supporting the Reddit user.
One person said, “I wouldn’t say anything other than to make dinner ALL MEAT. And make it meat with faces.”
Someone else added, “I’m the default hostess in my friend group, which also means I have to keep track of everyone’s allergies, and honestly, that’s not that big of a deal!” It can actually be quite fun because it forces me to be creative and try recipes that I otherwise wouldn’t have.”
People flooded the comments section and slammed the daughter-in-law while supporting the Reddit user
“NTA… nut allergies are serious. Taking care of allergies is basic hospitality during a dinner party. Maybe your daughter-in-law isn’t ready to play host yet. She CAN customize her menus, especially for close family members. They shouldn’t be surprised that you’re not coming,” another user added.
“This was my thought… she’s just a lousy host,” another person commented.
“Yes, it’s ruined. I had a roommate with a peanut allergy, so for 5 years I just did that. I didn’t make peanut chicken. We didn’t even have peanut butter in the house. You take allergies into account as part of your civilized humanity.
“Oh well, I’m going on a business trip and we were just asked about dietary restrictions and now thanks to me no one will have access to whole oranges (I’m allergic enough to citrus because being in the same room as someone peeling an orange makes me sneeze profusely) . Probably no one will even notice this limitation since there will probably be other snacks, but I’m glad I’m safe because of the quality administration.
And here the DIL is just pulling out of that whole part of the social contract,” another user wrote.
Someone else added: “NTA. I would never dream of asking an invited guest to bring their own food. Especially if I know in advance whether the allergy is present. Your son and DIL are being unreasonable. ‘
“Yes, as a host I would be ashamed if I couldn’t feed my guests,” said another user.
Another user said: ‘How many dishes can she make with different types of nuts? Is this an “I Love Nuts” party? This is strangely confusing on her part. Not that hole.”