Mum who STOP buying Christmas gifts for her two children when they were just eight and 10 claims the decision made their holidays better than ever – and helped them overcome a devastating family tragedy
A mother who stopped buying Christmas presents for her children when they were eight and ten after realizing the family already had enough says she has no regrets.
Maya Manseau, 61, and her family decided to stop buying each other gifts and instead donate $1,000 to charity every Christmas.
She says her children – Lindsay and Megan – fully supported the decision and were never angry.
Since the tradition started in 2001, the family has donated $1,000 a year to various charities.
Maya Manseau, 61, of Maine, and her family stopped buying each other Christmas presents in 2001 — and instead donated about $1,000 each year to various charities
The tradition started after Maya became ill just before Christmas 2000 and was unable to get her family presents in time for the holidays. Maya is pictured with her youngest daughter Megan
Instead of opening a pile of presents on the big day, they eat and celebrate with family.
Maya, a business owner from Maine, said, “The first year we did this was right after the September 11 terrorist attacks.
“I sat my two daughters down and did the normal thing of asking what they wanted to do for Christmas.
“The girls said, 'Mom, we have so much,' and we started talking about how we could help others.
“We decided to donate $1,000 to the 9/11 fund instead of giving each other presents.
'The following year we found a charity where you 'adopt a family' and buy them a list of gifts they've asked for. The girls couldn't agree more,” she continued.
'When we got the list, we saw that the father had written that he only wanted socks and mittens, and the girls were stunned.
“It was a really great learning lesson for the girls, teaching them about basic needs and giving.
For the first Christmas without presents — just months after the September 11 terrorist attacks — the family chose to donate $1,000 to a September 11 charity.
Maya lost her eldest daughter, Lindsay (pictured), to leukemia in 2012
'We enjoyed walking around and picking out presents for the children and parents.'
Maya's family experienced a difficult Christmas in 2000 due to a sudden illness, and she says it gave them a new perspective on the holiday.
In early December, she was struck by a flesh-eating virus after cutting her foot while cleaning an old swimming pool in Florida.
She was in the hospital for two weeks and given antibiotics.
She recalled the difficult incident: “They managed to fly me back to Maine from Florida.
'But I hadn't done much Christmas shopping and I was afraid the girls would get angry.
“When I told them, my oldest, who was ten at the time, said, 'Mom, you're here and you're doing well, and that's all I wanted for Christmas.'
Maya and her ex-partner still made stockings for the girls and stuffed them – they called them “elaborate stockings” – so that the children didn't wake up with nothing that day.
“They would be filled with a few items of clothing, books, puzzles and stationery and maybe a more expensive gift,” she said.
After losing Lindsay, Maya says her grief “fueled my desire to continue helping throughout the year” — especially considering the number of people who showed up for her and her family
Tragedy struck the family in 2012 when Maya lost her eldest daughter, Lindsay, after being diagnosed with leukemia at the age of 23.
She says it has made the Christmas holidays much harder, but continuing to give to others has helped them cope.
“It fueled my desire to continue helping throughout the year, I've had many people step up to help me in a big way, and I'm always looking to give that support back,” Maya said.
'We always try to help as many people as possible at Christmas, and when we find out someone is spending Christmas alone, we want them to join us.'
Maya's favorite part of Christmas is cooking together as a family.
“My mother-in-law taught home economics in high school and she loved baking and cooking,” she says.
'As soon as my children were old enough to stand on a chair wearing an apron, they cooked with her.'
Christmas hasn't been the same for the family since Lindsay's tragic death.
But this year, Maya is publishing a book called Living Intentionally After Loss to help others cope with grief.
She said Authority magazine to move past the loss: “As I began to heal, I began to teach others the things I had learned.”