My husband isn’t the dad I thought he would be and now I’m questioning our marriage
A new mother has begged people online for advice as she admitted her husband isn’t the father she thought he would be.
The unnamed mother – who gave birth to a baby boy 10 weeks ago – confessed that she began to resent her husband – of eight years – for his lack of care as a father.
She took to Reddit to reveal that she felt “alone” because she was doing all the work, adding that she wished her partner would “act like a real parent.”
In a thread titled ‘Parenting‘, the new mother opened up about the difficulties of single parenthood, as she revealed that her husband wouldn’t even make dinner for her when he cooked for himself.
The mother-of-one begged people for advice as she revealed she was frustrated with the way her life had turned out.
A new mother has begged people online for advice as she admitted her husband isn’t the father she thought he would be (stock image)
She captioned the post: “My husband is not the father I thought he would be.”
The mother revealed that she and her husband – who she did not name – have been together for eight years, but have only been married for one year.
And while in the past she always felt like the housework was shared equally, she noticed that her husband’s personality changed after they welcomed their son.
She revealed: ‘We had a baby boy ten weeks ago and his colors have really shown since then. His only child syndrome especially shone real.
“When he’s home, I have to ask if he can shower, let him hold the baby, ask him to change a diaper, ask, ask, ask. And then when he does what I ask, he acts like it’s a burden.
‘Then when I do things like take a shower all I hear is our baby’s crying and when I come upstairs to check on him he’s on the phone while the baby is crying in the bouncer. And as soon as I get back, he’ll give me the baby.’
The mother further explained that her husband did not even take her into account when preparing food.
She revealed that if her husband made or picked up dinner, he would only earn enough for himself.
She took to Reddit to reveal that she felt “alone” because she was doing all the work, adding that she wished her partner would “act like a real parent.”
‘He eats all our food too. When I place a grocery pickup order, all the food is gone within three days. He picks up food for himself or makes food for himself and I don’t.
‘I’m breastfeeding and because I’m constantly holding, feeding, rocking and loving our baby boy, I don’t have much time to get food for myself or hydrate myself.
“I just wish he would. I wish he would act like a real parent. I never in a million years thought it would be like this.
‘He goes to the gym every day before he works ten hours. So he only sees his son for about 30 minutes, but even then he doesn’t pick him up or anything,” she added.
The mother admitted that she felt extremely “lonely” and began to resent her husband.
At the end of the post she said: ‘I feel so alone. I’m starting to resent him. I can’t bear to hear about his life outside this house. I’m drowning and he has absolutely no idea what I sacrifice every day. I love our baby so much, but I wonder if I should have ever had him with my husband. This is not what I signed up for.
People on the Internet flocked to the comments section and offered a wave of advice to the new mom
‘What should I do? I feel like I’ve expressed my frustrations, but nothing changes. I know I can’t leave him, but I don’t want anything to do with him right now either. I’m so lost.’
People on the Internet flocked to the comments section and offered a wave of advice to the new mom.
One user said: ‘I would tell him that straight away. “You are not the father I thought you would be and your behavior makes me dislike you.” You then decide how much and for how long you want to tolerate this. ‘
Someone else added: ‘It’s hard when reality doesn’t match expectations. Have you shared heart to heart how you feel? Sometimes guys just need a push to take things a step further. Communication can help bridge that gap.’
‘Now is the time to be direct. Find out if he’s willing to change and put in the work, if not, you’re literally better off on your own,” another user added.
“You can absolutely leave. You can leave whenever you want,” someone else commented.
“Cut the dead weight loose. He’s a man-child. Kind regards, husband and father,” one person wrote.