A pizza thief’s stomach turns after a naval base manager undertakes an unconventional war to catch a thief stealing food from the communal refrigerator.
Navy members from HMAS Cerberus, a base 70km south of Melbourne near Crib Point, were notified after food kept disappearing from the fridge on Friday.
The base’s accommodation manager warned everyone to stop stealing food from the ‘1 Deck Fridge’ in an online group chat called ‘8 block bottom’.
“There have been many reports of food theft from the communal refrigerators recently,” the manager said.
‘The Deck ICs have kindly asked more than once that the guilty parties would stop. They didn’t do that and I’m absolutely fed up with it.’
To prevent further theft, the property manager made an example of a bad apple that had eaten a spoiled slice of pizza the night before, which had been used to mop around a toilet.
“To the lucky boy or boys who ate the pizza with the caption ‘Please don’t eat me, I’m not yours’: it was used to soak up the p*ss on the tiles around three of the toilets,” said them. added.
“If the stealing continues, I’ll get more and more creative with different foods and drinks on different decks on random days until it stops.”
An accommodation manager at a naval base in Victoria was tired of mopping the floor around a toilet with a slice of pizza to catch a food thief
A communal refrigerator at HMAS Cerberus Naval Base (pictured) kept being attacked by one or more people looking to steal another Navy member’s marked food
The accommodation manager had no sympathy for their victim.
Instead, according to the manager, it was simply “karma” for the “greedy thief.”
“Don’t take the chance or touch food that isn’t yours,” they warned.
Screenshots of the group chat were shared on The Pineapple Express, a social media page dedicated to veterans and current members of the armed forces.
All the comments on the post praised the property manager for punishing everyone who continued to steal food.
“Complex problems require innovative solutions,” said one man.
“Good to see nothing ever changes, it’s been 22 years,” celebrated another.
‘8 block is bad enough! Well, it certainly was when I was there,” a third added.
“I’m so glad I’m not a doctor dealing with that anymore,” someone else said.
Some people even started coming up with creative ways to find their own thieves.
“Just cook some food laced with laxatives. I’ll find out who it is soon,” one man suggested.
“Dishwasher soap next time,” a second recommended.