Malin Andersson shared details of her battle with postpartum depression this week while appearing on Giovanna Fletcher’s podcast Happy Mum Happy Baby.
The 30-year-old former Love Island star gave birth to daughter Xaya in February 2022, but suffered from pre- and postpartum depression during that time, which came after the tragic death of her daughter Consy in 2019.
Admitting that she had a feeling of ‘not being good enough’, the reality star explained the difficulty of fighting to be happy for the newcomer while grieving for her daughter and her late mother.
She split from Xaya’s ex-boyfriend and father, Jared, just months after the birth, sharing at the time that she felt “shocked.”
But sharing this week that the door is not closed for the couple, Malin added that “you can’t say no to the future” for the former couple.
‘There was a feeling of not being good enough’: Malin Andersson detailed her battle with postpartum depression this week and admitted she’s still holding out hope for a romance with ex-boyfriend Jared
Tough: The 30-year-old former Love Island star gave birth to daughter Xaya in February 2022, but suffered from pre- and postpartum depression during that time, which came after the tragic death of her daughter Consy in 2019
Malin has previously shared that she suffered from “bad suicidal thoughts” at her darkest while battling mental health issues after giving birth.
She lost her first daughter, Consy, in 2019, a month after a premature birth, which left her worried during the first months of raising Xaya, as she feared something would go wrong.
While it also became difficult to balance the new arrival as it brought up hurt feelings for his mother whom he lost in 2017.
Speaking on the podcast, Giovanna asked Malin what her postpartum depression was like.
The TV star shared: ‘I feel anxious, stressed and crying randomly. Looking at Xaya, thinking, oh my God, she’s beautiful and she’s mine, but oh, my God, she could die tomorrow.
“Am I doing this right? Where is my mother?” I mourn for my mother. Not wanting to get out of her, or not wanting anyone to know her, she didn’t want to see anyone.
Continuing on how this affected their relationship, Malin added that she wanted Jared to be there all the time and became “codependent.”
Adding: ‘Being too scared to be alone, because I didn’t think I was capable enough to care even though I fully was.
Difficult: Although it also became difficult to balance the newcomer, as it brought up hurt feelings for her mother, whom she lost in 2017.
Host: Speaking on the podcast, Giovanna asked Malin what her postpartum depression was like.
The TV star shared: ‘I feel anxious, stressed and crying randomly. Looking at Xaya, thinking, oh my God, she’s beautiful and she’s mine, but oh, my God, she could die tomorrow.
‘Breastfeeding, and then it became too much for me. I did 8 or 9 days, and then I decided to stop. There was a feeling of not being good enough because I wasn’t breastfeeding. There are so many things involved in it, it was a collection of everything.
In the spring of 2022, Malin shared with her Instagram followers that she and her boyfriend Jared had split, just months after welcoming their daughter.
But nearly a year later, the reality star is now in a healthy co-parenting relationship with her ex and sees hope for a possible reconciliation.
Explaining that she would never speak ill of Jared, due to the public nature of their relationship and family, Malin shared that she wouldn’t want her daughter to grow up and see her problems.
She told Giovanna: “I love him very much and he loves me, we were good friends for a long time and it just didn’t work out as a relationship.” But you can’t say no to the future, because now we get along well and things are going well.’
Download Giovanna Fletcher’s Happy Mum Happy Baby podcast every Tuesday at 6am from acast.com
I still hope: Malin also shared that the door isn’t closed on her relationship with ex Jared, Malin adding that ‘you can’t say no to the future’ for the ex-couple