Madison Beer, 24, reveals she contemplated suicide at 16
Madison Beer gets vulnerable in her upcoming memoir The Half of It, due out April 25.
In an excerpt shared with Peoplethe 24-year-old music artist – who was spotted at Coachella – describes a moment when she contemplated suicide at the age of 16 in 2015.
Part of the excerpt reads, “Once, on a particularly rough day, I climbed over the edge of my balcony in LA and stood there, a million thoughts running through my head as I stared at the floor, my eyes going in and out of attention.’
The harrowing experience happened when she split from her record label and her private, explicit photos leaked online.
The pop star told the publication earlier this year, “I really wanted to write this book right now because I thought sharing the ups and downs in my life could help other people navigate and relate to each other.”
Beer rose to fame as a teenager when Justin Bieber posted a link to one of her covers. In 2013 she released her debut single Melodies. In 2018 Beer released her debut EP As She Pleases.
Revelation: Madison Beer gets vulnerable in her forthcoming memoir The Half of It, out April 25, in which she chronicles a moment when she contemplated suicide at age 16; seen in March
Madison wrote in a volume of the literary work, “While negotiating the details of becoming independent was difficult, the emotional turmoil of being dropped was harder to work through.”
She was transparent as she continued, “Not only was it a bump in my career, it was a blow to my personal life.
“Combined with the trauma of having my nudes leaked, it completely shattered the image I had of Los Angeles and the industry.”
The excerpt published by Harper Books continued: “These two major, life-changing events that happened one after the other knocked me off my feet, flipped my world on its axis, and left me feeling like I had no idea who I was.
“I didn’t know who to trust anymore, and I didn’t even know I needed help for how I felt.”
In another part of the writing, Madison explained what happened when she was discovered on the balcony.
“One time, on a particularly rough day, I climbed over the edge of my balcony in LA and stood there, a million thoughts running through my head as I stared at the floor, my eyes going in and out of focus. I don’t think I would have jumped.
“It was more about knowing I could do it—that I had a way out if it got too much. Still, I hung there for a long time, numb from the fact that I wasn’t so afraid of being so high.’
Dark: The harrowing experience happened as she split from her record label and her private, explicit photos leaked online
Motivation: “I really wanted to write this book right now because I thought sharing the ups and downs in my life could help other people navigate and relate,” said Madison
She wrote that her brother discovered her and immediately called their parents.
“My little brother found me and screamed for my parents, and when I climbed back over and listened to them, I was just confused as to why they were making such a big deal of it.
“The thought of committing suicide was so normal to me at the time that I forgot it wasn’t something everyone thought about on a daily basis,” she wrote.
Elsewhere she reflected, “It was a lot of conflicting emotions for a girl just sixteen years old trying to carry them on her own. I felt like I was my own worst enemy.
“I became more and more withdrawn into myself, and it was the beginning of some of the darkest years of my life, starting at sixteen and going into my twenties.
“There were many times — like the night my nudes were leaked — when I felt so cornered that I thought the only way out was to end my life.”
The book was first announced in February, when Madison said, “I hope by sharing my honest journey that maybe someone who wants to hide behind a keyboard to be mean or poke fun at someone else’s expense will be twice think before clicking ‘submit’. ‘
She added, “I hope we can find the strength to support each other and work to treat others the way we want to be treated.”
Cozy: Madison posed with a copy of her book in a recent Instagram post
Dedication: Madison dedicated the piece to her family and her younger self
In her most recent Instagram post, Madison wrote to her 35.8 million followers, “less than two weeks. Half of it will be yours so soon. my memoirs, my story, my life and conversations I am finally ready to have. pre order in bio!!! X.’
Her mother Tracie Beer supported her as she wrote in the comments, “This book will truly help so many people in so many ways!”
The proud parent added, “So proud of you for being so vulnerable.”
In February, Madison took to the photo-sharing platform to post the dedication page and front and back covers.
She said in a heartfelt caption, “My memoir, The Half of It, will be yours April 25th. it really feels surreal announcing this book and I’m so excited to share my story with you in a way I’ve never done before.
‘from the reality of being scarred at the age of 12, to all that followed, where I am today, and my journey to reconcile with all that came before. it has taken me many extremely dark times to get here, but I feel incredibly ready to tell you these chapters of my story. i hope you like it. I can’t wait to introduce myself to you again.
you can pre-order my book now via the link in my bio. can’t believe this day has arrived. thank you in advance.’
All set: The singer-songwriter posted a photo of a shelf with copies of her book
Back cover: The back cover of the book featured a close-up photo of Madison’s closed eyes
The Biebs Link: Beer rose to fame as a teenager when Justin Bieber posted a link to one of her covers. In 2013 she released her debut single Melodies. In 2018 Beer released her debut EP As She Pleases. Seen in 2022