Kill me, I’m lonely: Mother, 60, requests euthanasia in Canada after becoming isolated from friends and family due to condition that causes aching bones
A mother of two has applied for euthanasia in Canada because she is lonely and estranged from her family and friends.
Jacquie Holyoak, 60, does not have a terminal condition but suffers from a sensitivity to pain which she says has left her bedridden, depressed and looking for ‘a way out’.
She spoke to DailyMail.com as Canada considers expanding its assisted dying laws to include people suffering from mental illness, which would give people like Ms Holyoak the ability to legally commit suicide.
Ms. Holyoak has fibromyalgia, a condition that affects 4 million Americans and causes muscle and bone pain and is treated with painkillers. She has also been diagnosed with depression.
The former nursing assistant – who has been unemployed for a decade and is on disability benefits – says the pain of her condition leaves her unable to do anything but lie in bed and watch television all day – leaving her extremely lonely.
Jacquie Holyoak, 60, does not have a terminal condition but instead wants to end her life because she lives in pain and poverty and would like to find a way out
Mrs Holyoak, pictured above with her two daughters, Haley (left) and Michelle, is estranged from her family and lives alone in social housing.
Ms Holyoak told DailyMail.com: ‘I don’t really have anyone in my life… there’s absolutely no quality – there’s not even money to go out and get a cup of coffee.
“So I just sit at home and watch football games.”
“My life is gradually getting worse and worse, but society dictates that I have to stay here.”
She is estranged from both of her adult daughters.
These days, she relies on deliveries and rare visits from friends as her only social interaction in her social housing in Fergus, Ontario.
Ms Holyoak told DailyMail.com that she applied for assisted death in mid-2022 based solely on her fibromyalgia, but the request was rejected.
She planned to reapply this year as Canada would relax requirements to include the opportunity for people struggling with mental health issues.
But that decision was delayed while officials began training psychiatrists to ensure it was offered only to the right candidates.
The chart above shows the number of people who have undergone an assisted death in Canada each year since the option became available in 2016. In 2021, the rule was relaxed to give the option to people with an ‘incurable condition’ rather than a terminal condition.
Oregon in the US is now seeing record numbers of people end their lives in the state after it became America’s first suicide tourism destination in 2022
Ms Holyoak said she was “angry” about the delay, adding that she is already refusing to take her high blood pressure medication because she does not want to continue.
In Canada, assisted death was made available for the terminally ill in 2016, but was then revised in 2021 to make it available to people suffering from an ‘incurable condition’ and suffering from a ‘low quality of life’.
To request an assisted death, Ms Holyoak will first need to submit a written request to her doctor – signed by a witness, such as a social worker.
Two independent doctors, such as psychiatrists, will then review her application and decide whether it meets the threshold for assisted death due to mental health.
Patients must have suffered from a mental illness for an extended period of time that is ‘severe and irreparable’.
If her request is approved, Ms Holyoak will be given the opportunity to withdraw her request and will also be referred to mental health services for further guidance.
If she is fully cleared, she will receive a lethal dose of anesthesia.
Since assisted dying became available in Canada in 2016, the number of people choosing this route has risen to as many as 13,000 by 2022. 5,600 people in 2019.
A small proportion of these – less than three percent in the past year – are among people who do not have a terminal condition.
Ms Holyoak described the happiest years of her life in the 1980s, when she had a husband and lived with her two children and two dogs in a house in St Thomas, near the US border.
But then she was diagnosed with fibromyalgia and also suffered from depression, which led to the peaceful family unit falling apart.
Mrs Holyoak added: ‘When you’re a mother, you were meant to be a mother – and suddenly I’m not.
‘I just fell, I kept falling every year, I fell further and further every year.
“This is eating away at me, so of course I would choose (assisted dying).”
Above you can see her pantry and refrigerator. Ms. Holyoak says she gets about $1,300 a month from the Canadian government, or the equivalent of about $200 a week after rent.
This image shows her social housing where she lives. In this image it was decorated for Christmas. She said she didn’t decorate for the holidays this year
Mrs Holyoak had previously worked as a nursing assistant and managed to buy her own townhouse before being struck by depression which left her unable to work
Mrs Holyoak later retrained as a nursing assistant and got a job at a local clinic, where she eventually managed to buy her own townhouse.
But then fibromyalgia and depression struck again, causing her to gradually lose everything and go on welfare.
She now receives $1,300 from the government every month to cover everything, including rent, which she says is not enough.
“I don’t have enough to eat well, to have coffee with anyone,” she said.
‘For the longest time I had to survive on one and a half meals a day, one of which was cereal and the other a boneless chicken thigh in a bun.
‘When I get up, I wait three hours before I eat. And then I wait, wait, as long as I can, until I have my dinner. The whole day is about trying not to be hungry.”
Fibromyalgia is a condition believed to be caused by damage to the nerves in the body.
Doctors diagnose the condition through a process of elimination, with no direct test to identify patients.
Symptoms include severe body aches and pain with activities such as walking, sitting upright, or even hugging.
Announcing the delay to the law change in February, Health Minister Mark Holland said: ‘The issue here is one of readiness.
“What we want to make sure is that the system is trained.”
Approximately 13,000 people in Canada use assisted dying for medical reasons each year. It is unclear how this number would shift if it were also approved for mental health care.
Assisted death is also available in ten US states – two of which, Oregon and Vermont, now allow out-of-state people to travel there to end their lives.
There are currently no plans in any US state to expand eligibility to people suffering exclusively from mental health conditions.