Kate Ferdinand reveals she ‘didn’t plan to have a baby’ as she opens up about her pregnancy

Kate Ferdinand revealed that she had no plans to have a second baby when she opened up about her pregnancy and the struggles of being a stepmother.

The former TOWIE star, 32 – who is expecting her second child with partner Rio Ferdinand – said she had “ups and downs” during her pregnancy.

Still, the TV personality revealed that she “feels free” after realizing she needs to take care of herself and the baby and “finally let go of everything” to please everyone.

Kate said on Spinning Plate with Sophie Ellis-Bextor, “You’re not exactly planning on having a baby, it just comes when the time is right and I feel like everything came at once.

“I’m not complaining, although I’m excited about all three things, baby and my two books.”

Already mum to son Cree, two, Kate is also a stepmother to Rio’s children Lorenz, 16, Tate, 14, and Tia, 12 – who he shared with Rebecca Ellison before she died of breast cancer in 2015, aged just 34.

She continued, “Pregnancy is really good this time but it is trial and error, some days are good, others I can’t get out of bed.

“I finally feel like I’ve let go of that feeling of doing everything, it’s freed me up a bit, I realize I have to take care of myself and the baby.”

“Cree hasn’t quite figured out that he won’t be the center of attention anymore. He has three older siblings and he gets all the attention, so I think it’s going to be a big shock to the system.”

Kate went on to discuss the “difficulty” of finding things to do with her son Cree and her stepchildren due to the large age difference.

She admitted that she gets a “serious sense of guilt” about not being able to please everyone, but sometimes said “you have to leave some kids behind” to make things work.

The reality star added: “The older kids are all the same age and they do the same things. There are 10 years between Tia and Cree and 14 years between Lorenzo and Cree. The things one wants to do, the other can’t.

“I find myself feeling very guilty about that. Of course Cree takes up more of my time, because he’s two, he’s not going to just chill in his room like a teenager.

“I have to save it and make sure everyone is okay. All I can do is go for a walk or into the park. Cree goes on his bike and we all talk. It’s quite difficult.

“There are pros and cons to having a big age gap, like Cree brings so much joy and laughter, but then on a weekend when the older kids want to go shopping, Cree starts going all out in Zara and I’m like of, “we can’t go shopping with a toddler”.

“Sometimes you have to leave a few kids behind, like Cree’s babysitting today, so I’m going to do something with the big kids.”

Kate revealed that after she gave birth to her firstborn Cree, she found it “really confusing” because she was “already a mother” but had only aged from six years.

The podcast’s host admitted that she “don’t feel so anxious this time around” as she prepares to welcome her second child in the coming weeks.

She continued, “It was really confusing having a baby, I think it’s fine parenting from the age of six, but then a baby came along and you’re in a bubble and it’s all about the baby.”

“I didn’t get the first baby experience and I had no idea what I was doing because I was already a mom, not a biological one, but it took me a while to get my head around it.

“I had three big kids who wanted help, I had to learn on the job. Hopefully it will be easier the second time around because I’ve been through it.

“It’s still juggling even though we have the new baby with Cree and still doing the PE kits and not doing well because I’m all over the place. I don’t feel so anxious this time.’

Elsewhere in the episode, the soon-to-be mother-of-five reflected on the first meeting with Lorenz, Tate and Tia while still appearing on The Only Way Is Essex.

She admitted that she has a “memory block” from her TOWIE years because it feels like a lifetime ago and she “didn’t feel safe.”

Kate had no idea what she wanted to do with her life, but gushed that she and husband Rio “saved each other.”

She explained, “It feels like a lifetime since I was a completely different person back then. I was still on TOWIE when I met the kids, my life was the complete opposite.

“I wasn’t prepared, I was doing my own thing on a reality TV show. I didn’t know what I wanted to do, but I went with the flow.

“Becoming a stepparent was a shock to the system, but it also saved me. We all saved each other, which is special. I feel like I didn’t know what I was doing.

“Rio and I saved each other, he lost his wife and his mother shortly after and I was with my ex on a reality show in this turbulent world for drama that didn’t feel safe.

Rio and I started a new beginning and that’s what we needed. It’s funny because I never thought I’d be here right now.

She added, “I feel like I have a different life. Because my life changed so drastically, I seem to have a memory block.

‘My whole being has changed completely. I always wanted to be a mother and start a big family because I was an only child. It has come to me in a way I never thought it would.’