‘We can’t be expected to be cool all the time’: Kate Ferdinand details the importance of mums putting themselves first after putting their needs at the ‘bottom of the pile’ in a blended family
Kate Ferdinand detailed the importance of moms putting themselves first after putting their own needs at the “bottom of the pile” when navigating their blended family.
The former TOWIE star, 31, who is pregnant with her second child, shares Cree, two, with her footballer husband and is step-mother to their three children Lorenz, 16, Tate, 14 and Tia, 11.
Speaking with child psychotherapist Emily Samuel, in a new episode of her podcast Mixed on Wednesday, she opened up about the pressure that comes with having children.
The duo shared their advice on “taking time for yourself” and setting a “good example for the kids” in a clip.
Kate began: ‘Coming into a blended family. and not being her mother, she wanted everything to be perfect, but sometimes that meant she would be at the bottom of the heap.’
Candid: Kate Ferdinand, 31, detailed the importance of mums putting themselves first after she put her own needs at the ‘bottom of the pile’ when navigating her blended family
Family: The TOWIE star, who is pregnant with her second child, shares one son Cree, two, with her footballer husband and is a step-mother to their three children Lorenz, 16, Tate, 14, and Tia, 11
She continued: “I think it’s natural when you have kids, but there has to be a certain level where you’re okay with it too.”
Now I have prioritized myself, I know it sounds selfish because my kids are my priority, but I have prioritized doing certain things to myself.
Kids can tell if I say, “Wait, I just need a minute because I’m feeling a little clumsy.”
“She’s a really good example for the kids because they know that when they need that down time, that’s okay too.”
“You can’t expect us to be there for everyone all the time and be great all the time.”
Psychotherapist Emily agreed, adding, “Totally, you’re also a person with needs and those needs need to be met as well.”
It comes after Kate admitted that her son Cree has “brought closer” to their blended family after initially being “nervous” about how he’ll fit into their blended family.
Though they’re a folded, happy family now, Kate admitted that before Cree was born, she was worried about introducing her first biological child into the mix after spending a few years with only her stepchildren.
Thoughts: Kate explained, “We can’t be expected to be there for everyone all the time and we’re expected to be great all the time.”
Psychotherapist Emily agreed, adding, “Totally, you’re also a person with needs and those needs need to be met as well.”
Speaking to Zoe Blaskey for a live edition of the Motherkind podcast during The Baby Show in London on Saturday, Kate told her that although son Cree has brought the family closer as a unit, he admitted there were initial concerns before his arrival.
“When Cree came along, we were a little nervous because he’s my first biological child, so we didn’t know how he would fit into the mix, but he’s been great and brought us all closer,” she explained.
She continued: “It’s just a crazy house, it’s full of fun and laughter and madness.” I can’t take a bath in peace, I look at Tia when I say that.
“So now, I announce when I’m going to shower and say ‘maybe I’ll come in when you’re taking a shower’ and that usually makes them stop.”