Queer Eye star Jonathan Van Ness has revealed that they underwent therapy after suffering from depression at the age of 25 following an HIV diagnosis.
Jonathan, now 36, discussed their journey with a man named Speedy, a wheelchair user who had become paraplegic after an accident and lost both his mother and aunt.
Jonathan, who is non-binary, asked Speedy if he ever had therapy and then revealed their own mental health issues and encouraged Speedy to talk to someone to come to terms with what he had been through.
Jonathan said, “There is so much power in asking for help. I live with HIV, I got it in my mid twenties, and I was very depressed and felt like I wasn’t in a good space.
Struggle: Jonathan Van Ness (far right in picture) has revealed they received therapy for depression following their HIV diagnosis
Jonathan said, “There is so much power in asking for help. I live with HIV, I got it in my mid-twenties, and I was very depressed and felt like I wasn’t in a good space’
They continued, “I needed therapy and I didn’t want to ask for help, and when I finally did, things started to get better.”
Jonathan, who is married to Mark Peacock, went on to talk about their feelings at the time, revealing that they often questioned the point of life while in the throes of depression.
The star, who married Mark in 2020, said: “I thought a lot about, at that time when I was depressed, like ‘what’s the point?’
“What I think life is is it’s about taking your biggest pain, turning that into a goal, and if you had a professional to talk to, it might help you work through some of the feelings that you’re going to go. Through.’
They also discussed the fact that seeking help for mental health problems is often seen as a sign of vulnerability, but disagreed with that view.
Jonathan said, “I think sometimes we think this idea of asking for help or being vulnerable is a sign of weakness, that’s actually the strongest thing we can do.”
It comes after the star first revealed their HIV diagnosis in their memoir Over The Top in 2019.
They also discussed their struggles with drug addiction and history as a sexual abuse survivor.
Candid: It comes after the star (pictured earlier this month) first revealed their HIV diagnosis in a 2019 memoir, in which they also discussed their struggles with drug addiction and sexual abuse
Jonathan said at the time, “I’ve had nightmares every night for the last three months because I’m afraid of being so vulnerable around people.”
They added in the interview with New York Times“It’s hard for me to be as open as I want to be when there are certain things I haven’t shared publicly. Those are things that need to be discussed.’
Van Ness said the abuse happened when they were younger and an older boy from the church took advantage of them during a mock play session.
They said, “For a lot of people who have survived a sexual assault at a young age, we have a lot of compound trauma.”
The television personality struggled with self-esteem due to the abuse and also struggled with life in the conservative Illinois town.
Jonathan went on a self-destructive path as a result, spending hours in AOL chat rooms and meeting up to have sex with older men.
They even shared that one man “became whiter than Ann Coulter’s fan base” when they revealed they were underage.
Jonathan even started bingeing after their stepfather’s death, gaining 70 pounds in three months.
Horrific: Jonathan shared that the abuse happened when they were younger and that an older boy from the church took advantage of them during a mock play session
Speaking out: The information about the sexual abuse and the HIV diagnosis was in their memoirs
Eventually, Jonathan left Quincy to attend college at the University of Arizona in Tucson a year early and began blowing their $200 monthly stipend worth of cocaine.
Not wanting to ask their mother for more money, Van Ness began advertising herself for sex on Gay.com.
They left college at age 19 and returned to their home before taking an 11-month cosmetology program at the Aveda Institute in Minneapolis.
They eventually moved to Scottsdale, Arizona, to be with their dying grandmother.
Jonathan then moved to Los Angeles to become a hair assistant at the Sally Hershberger.
But the hair stylist’s addiction to sex and drugs only got worse. They started using meth after meeting a couple they met on Grindr.
Their use resulted in Jonathan going to rehab twice and relapsing both times.
And when they turned 25, Jonathan passed out in a salon while highlighting a client’s hair. They tested positive for HIV shortly after going to Planned Parenthood for their flu-like symptoms.
“That day was as devastating as you could imagine,” they said in the book.
Jonathan has since sobered up and become a household name, only drinking and smoking occasionally.
They hoped to highlight the “beautiful moments of beauty” from their memoirs and sought to address the misconceptions about living with HIV.
“When ‘Queer Eye’ came out, it was really hard because I was like, ‘Do I want to talk about my status?'” they said.
And then I thought, “The Trump administration has done everything it can to allow the stigmatization of the LGBT community to thrive around me.” I do feel the need to talk about this.’