John Fetterman reveals he felt ‘desolate’ after opening up about depression and feared admission would end his career
Senator John Fetterman has revealed his concerns as he admitted his struggles with mental health would 'end' his political career.
The Pennsylvania Democrat said he believed the revelation that he was undergoing treatment for clinical depression “would be the end of my career.”
Fetterman, 54, checked into Walter Reed National Military Medical Center last February for depression.
“I was desolate for the first few weeks” after the story broke, Fetterman told NBC host Kristen Welker.
“I don't know what impact that would have on my family or anything like that.
Senator John Fetterman (left) revealed he was worried as he admitted his struggles with mental health would 'end' his political career
“So I really didn't know what was going to happen at that point,” the lawmaker explained.
The first-term senator, who was later fired in March, recalled a “very dark” episode in December 2022 when he could not get out of bed.
“People hear about 'I can't get out of bed' all their lives, and you really don't understand what that really means. You can't get out of bed until it happens to you. And that happened,” he explained.
Fetterman's mental health deteriorated after he suffered a stroke in May 2022 during his Senate campaign.
He described his depression as “kind of a slow burn, how it kept going.”
“And then, after the stroke, I was on the other side, and it was a different kind of challenge, because I knew that anything and everything would be weaponized by the other side,” he said.
After winning the 2022 Senate race, he said his depression “accelerated and got worse.”
“And I really scared my kids, and they were like, 'You won, Dad.' Why are we not enough? Why are you still so sad? Why are you even sadder?' And it was hard to explain why that was me.
Fetterman (pictured) checked himself into Walter Reed National Military Medical Center last February for depression
Fetterman's mental health deteriorated after he suffered a stroke in May 2022 during his Senate campaign.
“And of course a nine-year-old wouldn't understand that,” he said. “And it was horrible, and then it got more and more intense.”
While in hospital, the politician was 'shut down' and had no access to TV or internet.
Initially he had no contact with his family, but eventually his children were able to visit, a moment he described as a “turning point.”
“I was overwhelmed that they hugged me and they were so happy to see me,” he said.
“It was like a breakthrough,” he added.
Fetterman recently publicly broke with the grassroots activists who brought him to power since the war in Gaza broke out. Now some of these progressives have labeled him “#GenocideJohn” for his airtight support for Israel.
“What I've discovered over the last few years is that the right, and now the left, are hoping I die,” the Pennsylvania Democrat told the New York Times.
“There are those who are looking for a new blood clot.”
Fetterman recently publicly broke with the grassroots activists who brought him to power since the outbreak of the war in Gaza
Fetterman (right) with Rabbi Jeffrey Myers of the Tree of Life Synagogue (left) during the commemoration ceremony marking the fifth anniversary of the attack on the Tree of Life Synagogue on October 27 in Pittsburgh
John Fetterman at a March for Israel rally earlier this month
Fetterman said he hates progressives and their “purity tests.”
“It's just a place where I'm not,” he said. “I don't feel like I've left the label; it's just more that it has left me.'
Ceasefire protesters have flooded his office on Capitol Hill, and yet their former torchbearer has refused to give in and join calls for Israel to end its bombing campaign.
A deep intraparty divide has erupted among Democrats as the death toll in Gaza continues to rise and even President Biden has accused Israel of an “indiscriminate bombing campaign.”
Fetterman, meanwhile, taped photos of Israeli hostages to the wall outside his office and draped himself in photos with an Israeli flag.
“I find it confusing that the very left progressives in America don't really seem to want to support the only progressive nation in the region that really embraces the same kind of values that I would expect we would want as a society,” Fetterman said. .