JANA’S SEALED SECTION: In shockingly candid confessions, women who married ‘Mr OK’ instead of ‘Mr Right’ reveal the REAL cost of settling

“Why are you still single, Jana?” is one of the most common (and annoying) questions I get.

The answer is very simple: I have a deep-seated fear of settling down.

I’ve seen friends, family members, and acquaintances who hit a certain age, panic about their ticking fertility clock or the dwindling dating pool and, in their desperation, grab the nearest semi-decent guy and marry him without really thinking about it.

About a year later, they’re sitting in a divorce attorney’s office sobbing about the sad state of their marriage — or worse, still stuck in a marriage they’re no longer interested in.

At least, that’s how I always saw it from the outside. It’s a tricky subject and honestly, few people are willing to admit that they’ve settled for someone beneath them.

But I wanted to dig deeper, so I popped the question to my Instagram followers — who are always shockingly candid when it comes to matters of the heart.

“Have you ever settled for Mr OK instead of sticking with Mr Right? I’m looking for women who want to share their honest stories about what it really costs to be in a relationship,” I asked.

And oh, how the responses poured in.

If I’m honest, they were grim. It was a stark reminder of how many people have learned the hard way that settlement rarely leads to happiness.

Here are some of the most striking stories people shared with me…

‘I was 25 and had never had a boyfriend; I didn’t think I would meet anyone. When we met, we had many mutual friends. Yet I felt from the start that this might not be right.

‘Five years later we got married: when I walked down the aisle I had a terrible sinking feeling. Another five years later – ten years together in total – and after having two children, I made the decision to stop drinking. A month later I left him.

‘I realized that the only thing we had in common, besides our children, was drinking. I’ve always struggled with following my feelings, but since leaving my husband I’ve always been brutally honest with myself. If there is no connection, I will not settle.’

Another woman didn’t mince her words as she summarized her nearly decade-long marriage to a man who couldn’t satisfy her in the bedroom.

‘After nine years of snoring in the bedroom, I finally discover that there is better. I’ll never settle for bad sex again!’

One man also responded with a sad story about settling for a disrespectful partner because his self-esteem was so crushingly low.

‘I used to be very obese and I had weight loss several times.

‘I stayed with a girl for two years, despite her verbal abuse and mental abuse. I lived in her house and helped raise her two sons, even though she threatened to get the children’s father to “pick me out” if we argued. Her mother also stole my belongings to sell them for smoke or booze.

‘I finally had the courage to leave when I found out my partner was sleeping with my best friend.’

A woman revealed her sister is living with regret after leaving the man she ‘settled’ for – because he went on to do great things after their divorce.

‘This is my sister in a nutshell. Before her, her husband was an average man, and now she is single and alone after divorce and has no job. Meanwhile, he is now CEO and loves life. She always wanted more because her perfect man didn’t exist.’

When I asked if her sister regretted not staying with her husband, she replied:

‘Big time! My former brother-in-law was a saint for staying with her for 10 years. She had several affairs and honestly I’m just glad he’s out. She now realizes that the grass is not greener on the other side. He goes on all these “eat, pray, love” vacations, has a brand new house – and she got nothing in the divorce because they never bought any property together and his career didn’t really take off until after their wedding.

“She’s bad with money, so he never committed to joint bank accounts or buying a house with her because he knew she couldn’t be relied on. After the divorce she lives far beyond her means. Botox, hair, nails, clothes, a huge ute for God knows what reason, UberEats every night, weekends away alone.

‘She didn’t know what she had [with her ex] until he was gone. He was loyal, hardworking, a family man, yet she felt like he was beneath him. Silly, girl.”

And finally, this painfully pragmatic confession from a woman who, after having two children, realized that she had married a man simply because he offered her a comfortable life:

‘He came from a good family, tall, intelligent, ambitious and I was approaching thirty. I knew that with him I would have a fairly relaxed life and smart children.

‘I was happy enough, but I always felt like I came second to his ambition. We got married, traveled and lived all over the world. We had two children and then I realized I shouldn’t have married him and waited for someone else.

‘Eventually he ended things, so I didn’t have to file for divorce. He met someone through his work who had no children and shared his ambition.

“I got a good settlement in the end, so I have no hard feelings. I now have financial security and can find my true love. So in that sense, I don’t necessarily regret marrying for money and ‘breeding purposes.’

…I mean, congratulations?

So, what’s the moral of the story?

Getting settled may get you on the right track, but it doesn’t guarantee you’ll live happily ever after. Whether it’s bad sex, mismatched ambitions, or the realization that the only thing you had in common was alcohol, the cost of a settlement is high – and not just financially.

A recent study found that the happiest and healthiest women are those who remain single and have no children, proving that marriage isn’t the golden ticket to fulfillment you might want to believe.

Before you lock yourself into a life with Mr OK, ask yourself: is this a love worth building a future on, or should you wait for someone who will rock your world (and bed) every day? sets?

My advice? Wait a minute, ladies, wait a minute.